Buzz
When it comes to giving a check as a wedding gift, finding the right balance can be a challenge. A check may seem impersonal compared to a carefully chosen present, lacking that personal touch that makes a gift special. However, it's entirely possible to give a check in a thoughtful and meaningful way. In fact, many newlyweds appreciate monetary gifts, as they can use the funds for whatever they need most. To make your check gift special, consider personalizing the gesture to show your heartfelt sentiment.
Steps to Follow
Choosing the Best Method to Present Your Check
Mail the check to prevent it from getting lost during the wedding festivities. Unlike physical gifts that are hard to miss, such as a set of dishes or kitchen gadgets, a check can easily be misplaced amidst the chaos of a wedding reception. To ensure your gift reaches the couple safely, consider sending it by mail either before or after the big day.
- Following proper wedding etiquette, it's acceptable to mail the check before the wedding or promptly after. Avoid delaying beyond three months post-wedding.
- When sending the check by mail, address it to a permanent address where either of the spouses can receive it.
Consider Travel Constraints. If you're traveling a long distance to attend the wedding, bringing a large gift may not be practical or cost-effective. In such cases, a check offers a more convenient option.
- For destination weddings, giving a check can alleviate the challenges of transporting a bulky gift.
Opt for a Gift Card Instead. Think about giving the couple a gift card to a place that holds significance for them. It could be one of their favorite stores or restaurants. Gift cards eliminate the need for the recipient to physically deposit them, making them highly convenient.
- If you're aware of where the couple has registered, such as Target or Bed Bath and Beyond, getting a gift card for that store allows them to use it for items on their registry if they wish.
Adding Personal Touch to the Check
Include the Check in a Thoughtful Card. Avoid simply slipping a check into an envelope and sending it off. This can seem impersonal and lacks effort. Instead, enclose the check in a nice greeting card and write a personal message inside.
- Address the card to both the bride and groom, offering congratulations and perhaps recalling a shared memory.
Specify the Recipient on the Check. Make the check payable to only one of the individuals getting married. This way, they don't have to wait for a joint account to deposit it. For instance, instead of 'John AND Jane,' make it 'John OR Jane.'
- This is particularly useful if the couple hasn't established a joint account yet. The named individual can cash or deposit the check without delay.
- If one member is changing their last name, use their maiden name on the check to avoid waiting for legal name changes, which can take months.
Consider Adding a Touch of Elegance. For a more sophisticated presentation, instead of simply putting the check in an envelope, consider gift-wrapping it. Place the check inside a small box, wrap the box in decorative paper, and tie it with a ribbon.
- Unlike envelopes that may get misplaced, a wrapped box is less likely to be lost or thrown away accidentally.
- Even if you choose to gift-wrap the check, don't forget to include a note card with a heartfelt message.
Determining the Appropriate Gift Amount
Give a Meaningful Amount. Instead of writing a check for a standard sum like $15, $25, or $50, consider giving a more specific amount that holds significance for both you and the couple. This demonstrates thoughtful consideration rather than mere convenience.
- For instance, if you've shared dinners with the couple in the past, consider giving them enough for another dinner at your favorite restaurant, clearly stating this intention in your card message.
Stay Within Your Budget. Avoid straining your finances to impress the marrying couple. Determine a reasonable amount based on your financial capability, their potential needs (e.g., if they're planning a home purchase), and your relationship with them.
- Consider your level of closeness with the couple; closer relationships may warrant a more generous gift.
Refer to Traditional Etiquette. While it's crucial to consider your own financial situation, you can also look to traditional etiquette for guidance on appropriate gift amounts. Here are some suggested amounts based on your relationship with the couple:
- If you're a co-worker or distant family friend: $50–75.
- If you're a friend or relative: $75–100.
- If you're a close friend or family member: $100–150.
Useful Tips
- If you're placing the check or gift card in a box as suggested, consider tying a stylish ribbon around it and trimming the ends into “V” shapes for a polished look.
- In some cultures, expectations regarding wedding check gifts, including acceptable amounts, may vary. If unsure, seek advice from someone familiar with the couple's cultural norms.
Important Warnings
- While gifts are sometimes opened at the wedding reception, they're often opened later. Keep an eye on your bank statement; if the check remains uncashed after a few weeks, reach out to the couple to ensure they received it.
