Buzz
A mother's words wield immense power in shaping a child's psyche, profoundly influencing the development of their personality. Positive affirmations empower children to be confident and nurture a robust character.
How are you feeling today?
Dr. Brandi Russell, a pediatric therapist and member of the International Association for Child Counseling and Parenting, advises parents to engage their children in conversation by asking questions, as 'Questions open the door to dialogue with your child.' Simple questions like 'How are you feeling?' help children identify their own preferences and share their emotions with parents more easily.
You're such a kind-hearted boy/girl!
Melissa Divaris Thompson, a psychotherapist from Manhattan, USA, points out that sometimes simply saying 'You're such a kind-hearted boy/girl!' can have a positive impact on a child's psyche. When children are acknowledged for their good deeds by their parents, they become enthusiastic and continue to exhibit kindness, fostering a more humane approach to life.
Express gratitude to your beloved child!
Dr. John DeGarmo, a leading expert in parenting and child care in the United States, emphasizes that parents who seek respect must also give it, even to their own children. Dr. DeGarmo further advises, 'As a father and former teacher, I encourage parents to regularly express gratitude to their children.'
Apologize to your child!
When parents apologize, children realize the importance of taking responsibility for their actions. This also helps build trust in children because no one is exempt from making mistakes without apologizing.
You've done so well!
When your child does something well, don't hesitate to praise them with 'You've done so well!' Timely praise and encouragement will boost your child's morale, encouraging them to continue to excel and strive for more good deeds.
Mom feels delighted when you...
Kimberly Hershenson, a psychotherapist from New York, USA, suggests that parents should highlight specific examples of their child's behavior, talents, and character traits every day. 'Mom feels happy when you help with the housework,' 'Mom is really pleased because you remember to brush your teeth without being reminded,'... These serve as a morale booster for the child, bringing positive meaning and creating an excited mood for the child.
Tell me about your day at school today?
Sometimes parents don't realize that they've spoken too much without giving the child a chance to express themselves. Instead, parents should ask the child, invite them to share how their day went, what they did, and what results they achieved. Surely, the child will be open and ready to talk with Mom. But Mom also needs to turn off the computer or phone to focus on the child, or else the child might think Mom doesn't really want to listen to them.
Mom knows you can do it
Allowing children the opportunity to experience failure is one of the experiences parents should pay attention to. Teaching children how to solve problems when they are young will lay the foundation for them to handle problems as adults. To achieve this, Mom can tell the child 'Mom knows you can do it,' which is seen as a message to the child that they are fully capable of solving the difficulties they are facing, and Mom knows they can do it.
You don't have to be friends with everyone, but be polite
According to Dr. Jennifer Soos, a psychologist from Texas, USA, parents should let children know that making friends with everyone is unnecessary. However, teaching children to have a kind heart, behave civilizedly, and respect others is always the top criterion for her family in raising their children. 'You may not need to be friends with everyone, but you must respect and behave politely, that's important.'
Everything will be okay!
This is what parents say to encourage their children when they fail or don't achieve what they desire. According to Tesha Dames Smith, founder of the Klass Counseling program in the USA, parents should teach children about failure and let them know that 'Failure is not the end, try again. Everything will be fine.' This will guide the child throughout life about the meaning of failure and the effort to overcome difficulties.
What do you like to do/play?
Jennifer McCarville, an American researcher specializing in child development, suggests that parents can learn about their child's interests by asking or observing them. Nowadays, many parents only focus on how to help their children achieve high grades in school, how to quickly complete homework without knowing what their children are thinking or what they want to do according to their age. Knowing this, parents should change and regularly ask their children what they want to do, what games they like to play, or what they like to eat.
Are you happy/satisfied?
McCarville also suggests that when a child asks, 'Do you think my drawing is beautiful?' the answer is also a reverse question, 'Are you satisfied with your drawing?' Before giving feedback, let the child evaluate first and then respond in a way that hits the key point and clearly explains the issue for the child to understand, 'I see you've tried really hard on this painting, I like how you've mixed the colors.'
Mom loves you!
Last but not least, this might seem obvious, but are children sure to hear their parents say it every day? Parents can express their love for their children through actions, but sometimes expressing love through direct words will help children understand that love most accurately. Children's thinking is still simple, telling them words of love will make them realize the value and important position of themselves in their parents' hearts.
(Source: afamily)
