Top 10 Effective Strategies to Encourage Reluctant Children to Go to School

For young students in preschool and elementary school, the first days of school are special. It's the first day they leave the embrace of their parents, step into a completely new and unfamiliar environment. It's also the first day they meet friends, teachers, and more. That's why they need thorough preparation.

The first impression of the school is crucial. Through storytelling, especially from a trustworthy person, the listener can have either a positive or negative perception. In the hearts of our little angels, parents are the wisest and most reliable. Mother's stories about the world at kindergarten will stimulate curiosity and inspire the child's desire to go to class.

Parents try to talk to the child with enthusiasm and joy, discussing prominent features of the school, play areas, gardens, bookstores, teachers, friends, and more... so the child imagines that there is not only learning but also many enjoyable activities.

Take advantage of your child's relaxed and comfortable mood when picking them up in the afternoon for a chat. Spend some extra time at school, let your child play freely with the teacher, classmates, and engage in activities like drawing or puzzles. While your child is playing, take the opportunity to talk directly with the teacher to monitor and guide your child's learning and daily activities.

If your child doesn't want to leave and is still engrossed in unfinished toys at school, tell them: Mom will talk to the teacher to let you borrow a toy to bring home, and tomorrow morning when you go to school, you have to bring that toy back to the teacher! Say this when both you and the child are present. Of course, your child will be delighted because they are happily playing with those toys.

The next morning, before going to school, if your child is still crying, remind them of the agreement from the previous day: Yesterday, you promised the teacher and me that this morning you would bring the ball back. Do you remember borrowing it to bring home to play? So, now, should you go to school to return the toy to the teacher? The child will recall the agreement made between you, the teacher, and them to obediently go to school and return the toy.

Through stories, your child has started to form a positive impression of kindergarten. Strengthen these impressions by taking your child to visit the new school. The image of the school, magnificent like a palace, friendly and caring teachers, and most importantly, stimulating the 'innate desire for fun' when seeing classmates laughing joyfully in the playground, mom.

You can guide your child through the classrooms and introduce the activities that may take place in the class. Describe to your child the activities they can join to create excitement. However, if your child seems uncomfortable, parents should stop this activity to avoid undesirable reactions. This method of getting your child to school without crying is quite effective. However, parents also need to note that only private schools allow such visits beforehand.

If your child has been attending school for a while, they probably have a friend, not necessarily a close one, but someone they enjoy playing with the most in the class. In fact, 2-year-olds can remember names and play with some classmates in their class.

Moms should find out which friend your child values the most and enjoys playing with. This way, when your child doesn't want to go to school, you can use this trick: Mom tells your child that if they don't go to school today, their friend Mita (for example) will feel sad. This trick is not only effective for yourself but also proves to be quite effective for some other moms. After hearing mom say that, children are often enthusiastic and positive about going to school.

Starting preschool early can make children feel disoriented and scared when away from their parents in a new environment. Having a familiar friend nearby might provide comfort, reduce uncertainty, and eliminate the sense of loneliness in an unfamiliar setting.

For instance, when playing with a teddy bear, a child may not need their parents around. A teddy bear serves as a playmate, offering comfort during naps, fostering independence. Therefore, parents can let their child bring their favorite teddy bear or toy from home. It becomes a companion for the child in the new environment.

When choosing a teddy bear, parents should ensure it is made from safe materials, avoiding chemicals, dust, or hard materials that may harm the child's skin. The teddy bear should have soft fur, filled with 100% clean cotton to prevent any health issues for the child.

Any beloved item or toy from home can provide a sense of comfort and familiarity during these initial days.

Every parent wants to know what experiences their child had at school. In the evening, before bedtime, allocate some time for you and your child to have a conversation. However, many parents greet their child with a pre-prepared standard question like: 'Was school fun today?' or 'How was school today?'. These vague questions often leave most children puzzled, and they might respond with a simple 'Fun – Not fun', 'Good – Not good'. It doesn't give them the chance to express and share more information.

Here's a list of a variety of interesting questions that can be helpful for parents:

• What happened at school today that made you the happiest?
• Can you tell me the names of 3 friends you talked to today?
• If I were your teacher, what subject would you want me to teach you tomorrow?
• According to you, what's the biggest difference between this school year and last year?
• What are you excited to do in class tomorrow?

Ask your child about their friends, their teacher, and the activities they did during the day. If your child can't answer, don't be quick to feel sad or discouraged. See it as an opportunity for you and your child to engage in conversation, bringing them closer to the school. Sing songs about school, teachers, or recite poems your child learns at school.

Buy books with themes related to the above questions. The goal is to create joy, familiarity, and interest in going to school. This is a method that requires parents to be patient, with results becoming apparent after some time.

You can also say to your child: 'Now, mom and dad have to go to work. If you don't want to go to school, that's okay, stay at home alone!' Your child might nod in agreement, but after that nod, when they see mom and dad walking away, they will understand the situation and obediently climb into the car to go to school.

However, not every child will cooperate so easily. In the case of a more stubborn child, you should never scold or shout at them because this would be like 'adding fuel to the fire'. It not only makes the child stop crying but also makes them more stubborn and resistant. Try to coax the child, because sometimes, children really like to be comforted.

Many think that young children 'know nothing.' However, they are incredibly sensitive. Going to kindergarten marks the first milestone when a child is away from parents for an extended period. Parents always arriving late can make the child's heart tighten every time they see a friend leave before them, gradually feeling that parents don't love them. As darkness falls outside, the child's loneliness and anxiety increase. That emotional distress is not easily compensated for with a bag of snacks or a toy.

Before going to school, parents should let the child know when they'll be picked up. So, soothe the child's worries with phrases like 'Mom will pick you up right after work' or 'You just need to study a bit, then you can come home, be good.'

These phrases are considered effective ways to send a child to school without crying, calming their mind and making them more composed. The child thinks they'll see Mom again soon. This method is successfully applied by many parents.

Historian Xenophon once said: 'The sweetest sound of all sounds is the sound of praise.' This holds entirely true in educating children. Parents regularly offering praise will make the child happy, provide motivation for learning and skill development, and make them feel cared for and valued. Praising a child requires parents to observe and evaluate accurately and specifically.

Praising is not just saying a phrase like 'good job' or 'well-behaved.' It must be specific so the child knows their strengths. For example, when picking up your child from school, observe their actions and attitude, then praise them for being well-behaved and listening to the teacher. Such specific praise helps the child recognize their strengths and areas for improvement. The next day, the child will be more enthusiastic about going to school and less likely to cry.