People Are Sharing The Most Absurd Ways They've Hurt Themselves, And I'm Laughing Just As Much As I'm Wincing

We reached out to members of the Mytour Community and asked, "What’s the most ridiculous way you’ve ever hurt yourself?" and to our amusement (sorry), you all confessed to your most comical, unintentional injuries.

Be aware that some of these tales may include unsettling details. If you're sensitive to such stories, proceed carefully!

1. "I once slammed the trunk of my van right into my forehead. It wasn’t the back edge, but the side, so it left a cut running from my hairline to just above one eyebrow. The strange part? It didn’t even hurt. I was more frustrated and worried about getting my 24-pack of Diet Pepsi into the fridge (top priority), along with all the other groceries, and making sure I didn't ruin my favorite dress! The dress was fine, and so was I. Now I have a quirky four-inch scar on my forehead. Doesn’t bother me much though. It’s a pretty hilarious story I tell at my own expense!"

—kathryndownard

2. "I was tossing a small watermelon up in the air and missed. It landed right on my head, giving me a mild concussion."

—calypsocoin

3. "I was performing 'Part of Your World' at a Disney karaoke event. While singing, I was doing little 'princess hops' and ended up snapping my ACL. I collapsed to the floor but finished the song as a mermaid lying down, then, using the mic, I asked the bar to bring me a bag of ice. I work as a bartender at a nearby bar and still get teased about it three years later."

—katnap10

4. "I attempted parkour over my old wooden fence after placing a worm on my sister’s arm while gardening. She then chased me around the backyard with that worm in hand. I ended up with a nasty gash and some heavy bruising. This happened recently, and we’re both in our early 20s..."

—marywester

5. "I had just cleaned and waxed the floor. While waiting for my mom to get home, I decided to try the Tom Cruise slide. I couldn’t stop and ended up crashing into a doorpost, splitting my lip wide open. My mom wasn’t thrilled about having to take me to the ER after a long day of work."

—jgcromwell

6. "I was working out with my friend, and he made me laugh so hard that I fell off the treadmill. He told such a funny joke that I couldn’t stay mad at him."

—opossumnamedcharlie

7. "I was living in a basement 'mother-in-law' unit that I rented from my mom. One morning, after chatting with her, I went to open the door to go downstairs, only to realize she had set a 9x13 Pyrex dish she’d borrowed right on the top step. The stairwell was dark, and my first step landed straight into the dish, causing it to start moving. I tried stepping over it with my left foot, but the dish kept sliding, and I ended up riding it all the way to the bottom — all while sitting on my twisted ankle, which was stuck in the dish. Long story short, I spent the next eight weeks in an air boot."

—jenstrobeck

8. I grabbed a beef skewer directly from a fondue pot and immediately popped it into my mouth. Without hesitation, I shoved the entire beef piece in and sealed my lips around the searing, hot metal skewer! The heat caused me to lose several layers of skin from my tongue and the roof of my mouth, while my lips began to bubble and blister! The swelling was so intense, I couldn’t speak for the rest of the day. The pain was unbearable, so I couldn’t eat solid food for the next two days. My taste buds were burned off, and for nearly a week, I couldn’t taste anything at all. That was over 20 years ago, and I’ve never touched fondue since then.

—jmacxjr

9. In art class, I fell off a stool and ended up pulling a muscle in my butt.

—sheridanbreeding

10. "A week before my freshman year of high school, I tried ice skating for the first time with friends. In my excitement, I attempted tricks that were too advanced for me. Unfortunately, I ended up falling awkwardly and injuring myself. To make matters worse, I started my first day of high school with a painful injury on my rear."

—vaestrada1

11. "I was playing a VR game when the boundary feature malfunctioned. To make matters worse, I was outside, barefoot. I accidentally ran straight into a wall and literally flipped over. I ended up breaking my foot."

—juliajoseph

12. "I didn't realize I had a small cut on my toe. After cleaning the litter box, I unknowingly got dirty litter stuck in my foot. My toe started swelling and I got terribly ill. Antibiotics didn’t help at first. Eventually, I had to go to the hospital for MRSA. A podiatrist finally numbed my foot and used an MRI to locate the litter. Once removed, the infection cleared up after the antibiotics kicked in. TL;DR: Always wear shoes when cleaning a litter box."

—lexikatz27

13. "I dislocated my knee by kicking a balloon. I was indoors, pretending to play soccer without an actual ball. My knee gave out when I made the kick. At that time, I was a pretty skilled athlete too."

—selenakylecalico

14. "I decided to poke a hornet's nest that was high up in the eaves of our second story with a long extension pole from a pool cleaning kit to see if they could tell I was the one bothering them, all the way down on the ground. They definitely knew, and as I ran around the corner of the house to escape, I tripped in my clogs and slammed my toes so hard into the wood that I thought I had broken one of them. All of them were bruised and purple. I never told my parents about it."

—ginnyjensen

15. "I stood on top of a beach ball and ended up falling straight into a coffee table."

—blissfullyswift13

16. "I tried to switch glasses while inside a revolving door, thinking that when it stopped, I could just walk out. I slammed my face into the glass with my Ray-Bans, cracking my nose, but luckily, my sunglasses survived without a scratch. Thankfully, I was at the VA hospital, where they gave me a cold pack for my nose and referred me to the ENT for my deviated septum."

—famouscoyote724

17. "When I was a kid, I once tried doing a handstand in our living room and ended up tipping over into the giant old stereo system. My sister nearly lost it laughing."

—bonedust

18. "I accidentally ran myself over with my husband's truck. I thought I had put it in park, so I got out to adjust the floor mat that was stuck on the accelerator pedal. I tried shoving it under the pedal, but ended up slamming the gas in reverse. The truck took me with it, dragging me for about 25 feet, with my body pinned in the door. I suffered a severe concussion and was bruised and bleeding everywhere. I do not recommend this."

—fancybutterfly89

19. "I once spotted a spider in the bathroom by the door. The doors in this apartment are a little elevated, creating about a two-inch gap between the floor and the door. I tried to step on the spider, but my foot slipped, and my toenail caught on the door, ripping it off. It was definitely not my best day."

—oregonduck90

20. "I stood on a barstool to pull a nail out of the wall, and the seat spun. I lost my balance and cracked my forehead, needing four stitches! Oh, and two years ago, I thought it would be a good idea to go down some steps in roller skates. I fell and ended up with 10 stitches in my knee!"

—jodildelucia

21. "When I was about 12, my sister and I decided to build a fort in the yard using the porch furniture. I grabbed a chair from the porch but misjudged where the railing was, and ended up slamming into it with the chair. I was knocked backward onto a metal ladder we had on the porch. The ladder ripped through my jeans and pierced my thigh. I ended up in the ER for stitches, and the nurse kept asking, 'Did you fall OFF a ladder?' and I tearfully kept answering, 'No, I fell ON one!'"

—wickedpear741

22. "I sprained my finger while taking a load of laundry downstairs at my old house. My cat loved to lay on the steps, but I didn’t realize she was there until I stepped on her. I tried to avoid stepping on her, but lost my balance and tumbled the rest of the way down. My middle finger got caught in the laundry basket and twisted painfully. To this day, my middle knuckle on that finger is crooked. Oh, and my cat came down to check on me at the bottom of the steps, then just walked away."

—grouchytable74

23. "I fell backwards onto gravel while wearing stilettos because the guy I was seeing greeted me at the door with a pet tarantula on his chest. I broke my toe."

—koalacat

24. "I couldn’t find my fork (yes, I only had one) and refused to use my roommates' silverware (I didn’t know them, and I wasn’t about to use a meat-eater’s utensils), so I was using a knife to poke holes in a potato for the microwave. I ended up slicing through the top of the potato and cutting my finger. Four stitches later, it was the first and only time I’ve ever needed stitches. Sigh."

—ghostgothgirl

25. "I was giving my kitten medicine at the bottom of the stairs, and when I needed to go up to grab something, my kitten was still sitting there. I tried to step around him, but my foot slipped. I was almost at the bottom, so I only fell about three steps. When I landed, I crashed my shoulder into the wall separating the stairs from the other room, and I ended up breaking part of the drywall."

—falloutpanicatthemychemicalboy

26. "A few days before Christmas, I was cleaning the house and quickly squatted down to pick up a dead poinsettia leaf. I ended up tearing my upper calf muscle. At the time, I had just started a new job, and my insurance didn’t kick in until January 1. I suffered through it for 10 days, but the swelling got so bad that my knee locked up and I couldn’t bend it. Finally, I saw a doctor on January 3, and I ended up on crutches for a month, followed by physical therapy to unlock my knee. Poinsettias are now banned from my home!"

—mike517

27. "When I was 7, I ran straight into a sliding glass door and ended up breaking my nose."

—hellocomputer1701

"I cut my finger open on a disco ball. Honestly, I’ve never seen so much blood in my life," I confessed.

—strawberrylumps22

"I attempted a high kick as a joke, but didn’t realize I had shifted my body forward in the process. When my leg came down, it slammed into the hardwood coffee table. I ended up with a massive bruise and limped around for the entire day."

—panda_13

"I was riding my horse when I noticed some long vines hanging from the trees. In a moment of poor judgment, I thought it would be fun to ride through them. They turned out to be thorny vines, and they scraped my arms up pretty badly. I still have the scars after more than 30 years. The following day, my mom wrote a note to my gym teacher that said: 'Please excuse Luna from class today. She was attacked by a killer bush.' I was in sixth grade and I’ve never felt so embarrassed. My parents found it hilarious, but I sure didn’t."

—lunallee212

"I couldn’t figure out how to remove the used capsule from my Nespresso machine, so I shoved my hand into it to try and pull it out. After about 20 minutes, one full-blown panic attack, and a hand that looked like it had been through a shredder, I finally managed to yank it free. Then I discovered the compartment for used capsules."

—sillytiger38

"I ended up injuring my knee while playing foosball."

—frenkiedebong

33. "My laundry appliances are hidden beneath the basement stairs. THREE TIMES I've managed to give myself a light concussion while attempting to toss something into the dryer, only to hit my head on the stairs when standing up."

—luxahoy

34. "As I was cycling through my neighborhood, I noticed some of my new neighbors had gotten a puppy. While I was riding past, the adorable puppy caught my eye, and as I turned back to watch where I was going, I was inches away from a mailbox. There was no time to adjust, and I ended up crashing into it. The mailbox still leans to one side, but it was worth it because I got to pet the puppy."

—ashhaha

35. "I was working at a pizza chain and stepped outside for a break to meet my boyfriend, who brought me some food. The police were there, investigating something that happened in the parking lot. Being curious, I watched them instead of looking where I was going. Suddenly, I stepped into a deep pothole and collapsed. The cops and my boyfriend had to help me into the car because I broke my ankle. None of my coworkers came to check on me, so I drove through the drive-thru to let them know I was leaving! Despite being a minimum-wage job, they wrote me up for calling out the next day, even though the job required me to be on my feet all day."

—grumpyvolcano632

36. "I walked straight into a stop sign. I was heading to school with a friend, and we were chatting, so I was looking at him. When I turned back to look ahead, I collided face-first into a stop sign. It left me with a pretty noticeable black eye for a while."

—flyerboy6

37. "I was blow-drying my hair on the edge of my bed before heading to high school and ended up breaking my tailbone. I'm not sure if it was aggravated by years of horseback riding since I was four, an odd sitting position, or a mix of both. I heard a sharp crack, felt a surge of pain, got the X-rays, and had to sit on an inflatable donut cushion for weeks during class."

—problematik

"I was rushing through my shower to meet some friends. While I quickly scrubbed my face, my pinkie finger accidentally went up my nose, causing a tear in the membrane and triggering an awful nosebleed."

—makgrey515

"In no particular order: 1. I broke my collarbone falling off a pillow mountain. 2. I split my lip when a softball hit me in the face. 3. I had to wear an eye patch for two weeks after my sister unintentionally jabbed me in the eye with a tree branch on the 4th of July. 4. I sliced my toe while changing the sheets. 5. I cut my finger while removing the pit from an avocado."

—beananddog

40. "I did a cartwheel right into the TV in my living room and ended up breaking my ankle."

—hannahs410b52435

41. "I broke my big toe while running away from a friend… who was chasing me with a wet sock. It was during my 13th birthday party. Seven years later, my toe remains permanently crooked."

—bcanestrini722

42. "When I was 12, I was playing 'The Floor is Lava' by myself. I climbed onto an old ottoman, but the cushion shifted slightly. Then, the base of the ottoman tilted, and I ended up landing on the heater. My pinkie finger got crushed under the pressure. I told my parents it happened at a playdate later that day. After suffering for a few hours, I finally told them and went to the ER."

—katycatone

43. Here’s a funny incident: "I was working as a bartender when I decided to fill up the ice wells. Instead of returning the ice bucket properly, I carelessly left it on the floor behind the bar. I ended up tripping over it and broke my elbow. Fortunately, my shift was over, and since workman's comp is a no-fault system, I could still use it even though the accident was entirely my fault."

—laurengfrost