Top 10 Imaginary Films That Deserve to Be Produced

The term 'fictional movie' refers to a film that doesn’t exist in reality. These movies often appear as background elements in other films or TV shows, such as posters, trailers, billboards, or theater marquees. Sometimes, they are only mentioned in dialogues between characters within a story. For instance, 'The Dueling Cavalier' in *Singin’ in the Rain* serves as a film-within-a-film. A real-world example is the Coen brothers’ *O Brother, Where Art Thou?*, which borrowed its title from a fictional movie in *Sullivan’s Travels*. While the plots of the real and fictional versions differ, they share similar settings and themes. On the special edition DVD, the Coen brothers even suggest their film is close to what Sullivan might have created after the events of *Sullivan’s Travels*.

Here’s a list of fictional movies that I think Hollywood should bring to life, either to fulfill my inner fanboy dreams or because I believe they could become genuinely entertaining films.

10. Thundercats

As I’ve aged, I’ve realized that many things I loved as a child weren’t as great as I remembered. Bazooka gum, Big Macs, Monopoly… and *Thundercats*. While I adored the show as a kid, rewatching it in college left me underwhelmed. I’m still skeptical about a movie adaptation being successful, as the core story is somewhat absurd and illogical. *Thundercats* earns its spot on this list purely because of the impressive fake trailer. That said, I don’t mind an occasional mindless action-adventure film, like *The Mummy*. With my lowered expectations and a strong dose of nostalgia, I could see myself enjoying this movie when it eventually hits DVD.

9. Angels With Filthy Souls - Home Alone

Recall that iconic moment where Macaulay Culkin’s character fools the pizza delivery guy with a movie? That movie is *Angels With Filthy Souls*. For years, I believed this was a real film. Designed to mimic classic gangster flicks in a film noir style, it features unforgettable characters like Acey and Snakes, along with lines such as, 'I’m gonna give ya till the count of ten to get yer ugly, yella, no good keister off my property before I pump yer guts fulla lead!' While I don’t necessarily want someone to create this movie, I wish it were real. A sequel, *Angels With Even Filthier Souls*, even appeared in *Home Alone 2*.

8. See You Next Wednesday

*See You Next Wednesday* is a running joke in many of John Landis’s films. Landis, the director behind classics like *National Lampoon’s Animal House*, *Blues Brothers*, *¡Three Amigos!*, and *Spies Like Us*, often includes references to SYNW through character dialogue or background posters. The catch is that SYNW’s plot and genre vary wildly across films—it’s been a war epic, a melodrama, a porno, and a horror film, among others. With no fixed storyline, Landis would have complete creative freedom, though it would likely lean toward comedy. Given his comedic genius, the result could resemble *The Kentucky Fried Movie*, but with a sharper focus on parodying Hollywood.

7. Firestorm - Seinfeld

Many entries on this list serve as parodies or tributes to specific genres or films. *Seinfeld* is packed with such fictional movies, including *The Flaming Globes of Sigmund*, *Prognosis Negative*, *Chunnel*, and *Blimp: The Hindenburg Story*, among others. *Firestorm* appears to be a spoof of action films, frequently mentioned across multiple episodes but never shown—only discussed. It features Harrison Ford, who reportedly 'jumped out of a plane and shot back at his pursuers while falling.' The film also includes an 'underwater escape' and a 'helicopter landing on a car.' In the show, it’s portrayed as a massive blockbuster, and I believe it would be just as successful in real life. It’s been a while since I’ve enjoyed a mindless, over-the-top summer action flick, and *Firestorm* seems like the perfect candidate. Seriously, why hasn’t this been made yet? (And no, the 1998 Howie Long movie with the same name doesn’t count—I want plane-shooting action!)

6. Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie - The Simpsons

*The Simpsons* frequently uses fictional movies for comedic effect, often featuring absurdly numbered sequels or pun-based titles. Some of my favorites include *Star Trek XII: So Very Tired* and *Das Butt*. However, *The Itchy and Scratchy Show* has been a staple since the early seasons and even got its own movie in season six. With *The Simpsons* already having a feature film, it’s time for Itchy and Scratchy to take the spotlight.

In today’s world, animated films should explore more mature themes. While I adore Pixar and DreamWorks Animation, the genre needs to evolve. An *Itchy and Scratchy* movie would undoubtedly be hyper-violent, but that’s part of its charm. I’ve always loved the *Spy vs Spy* segments from *MadTV*. *South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut* was a step in the right direction, but we need more and better. Japanese masterpieces like *Grave of the Fireflies* and *Princess Mononoke* have shown the potential of adult-oriented animation. While *Itchy and Scratchy* may not be high-brow, it could push the industry forward. With Matt Groening’s creative genius behind it, this film might exceed expectations.

5. Werewolf Women of the SS - Grindhouse

This mock trailer, crafted by Rob Zombie for Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez’s *Grindhouse*, boldly declares itself as 'A groundbreaking achievement in cinematic history. Finally, the truth behind Hitler’s sinister scheme to engineer a race of superwomen is revealed…' Among the five faux trailers created, including *Machete*, *Hobo With A Shotgun*, *Don’t!*, and *Thanksgiving*, *Werewolf Women of the SS* stands out as a tribute to 1970s exploitation films. Packed with werewolves, Nazis, mad scientists, scantily clad women, and Nicolas Cage as Fu Manchu, it’s a campy delight. While *Machete* and *Hobo with a Shotgun* are stuck in development hell, this one remains a fan favorite.

If *Werewolf Women of the SS* ever gets made, it’s crucial it avoids descending into torture porn, which would ruin its charm. The film’s appeal lies in its deliberate cheesiness. However, crafting a movie that’s so-bad-it’s-good is no easy feat, and audiences often miss the point. Recent attempts like *Snakes On A Plane* and *Shoot ‘Em Up* failed to impress critics or dominate the box office, highlighting the challenge of balancing camp with quality.

4. Rochelle, Rochelle - Seinfeld

Another gem from the *Seinfeld* universe, *Rochelle, Rochelle* earns its spot on this list due to its recurring mentions across multiple episodes. Like *Firestorm*, it was never shown but served as a key plot point in “The Movie” episode. It even got nods in *Curb Your Enthusiasm* and an American Express ad featuring Larry David. The tagline, 'A young girl’s strange, erotic journey from Milan to Minsk,' sums it up perfectly. While the film is supposedly unwatchable, its abundance of nudity was its main draw. Later adapted into a Broadway musical starring Bette Midler, its real-life potential remains unclear. Still, a cheeky, self-aware version could work—after all, *Striptease* grossed $113 million worldwide. As Elaine aptly put it, 'Men will sit through the most boring, pointless movie if there’s the slightest chance a woman will take her top off.'

3. The Legend of Zelda

*The Legend of Zelda* is a fake trailer that surfaced on IGN in 2008 as an April Fool’s prank. I stumbled upon it days later and was both amazed and disappointed to learn it wasn’t real. The original *Legend of Zelda* games on the NES and SNES are among my all-time favorites. Unlike other video game franchises (yes, *Mario* and *Luigi*, I’m talking about you), the world of Hyrule is rich and immersive. With countless games in the series, the characters, races, weapons, and settings are already well-developed. Anyone creating a *Legend of Zelda* trilogy (because one movie wouldn’t suffice) would have an abundance of material to draw from.

The primary reason *The Legend of Zelda* tops this list is its potential for massive success. While a film like *Thundercats* might only resonate with those who grew up watching the show, *Zelda* appeals to a broader audience, as both boys and girls play the games. Thanks to consistent releases on the Wii and DS, the franchise continues to grow its fan base, ensuring it doesn’t rely solely on nostalgia. An epic fantasy adventure akin to *Lord of the Rings* would have universal appeal, not to mention the chance for a rare video game tie-in that’s actually good. Peter Jackson would be the ideal director, but almost anyone could excel—as long as Uwe Boll stays far away. A *Legend of Zelda* trilogy could finally achieve what Hollywood has yet to do: create a great video game movie.

2. Aquaman - Entourage

The days when comic book movies made even the most devoted fans cringe are long gone. With advancements in CGI and a newfound respect for source material, these films are thriving. Recent hits like *The Dark Knight* and *Watchmen* have shown that comic book movies can also be intellectually stimulating.

As a series centered around a Hollywood star, *Entourage* introduced several intriguing movie concepts, including *Medellin*, *Smoke Jumpers*, and a Martin Scorsese-directed *Great Gatsby*. However, *Aquaman* stands out as the most notable, playing a pivotal role in Seasons 2 and 3. Kevin Smith even mentioned being asked about *Aquaman 2*, despite the first film never existing.

While Aquaman might not be the most compelling comic book character, the real draw here is James Cameron. What Aquaman desperately needs is someone who genuinely appreciates the grandeur and beauty of the ocean. Cameron’s post-*Titanic* projects, such as *Aliens of the Deep* and *Ghosts of the Abyss*, along with *Avatar*, demonstrate his ability to capture the awe and mystery of unexplored worlds. Known for pushing the boundaries of CGI technology, Cameron is uniquely suited to handle the underwater scenes that would dominate the film. Simply put, no one else is as qualified for this task. As for casting, Adrian Grenier doesn’t quite fit the bill, but Charlie Hunnam from *Sons of Anarchy* could be perfect—just add a hook to his hand, and he’s ready to go.

1. The 3 - Adaptation

*The 3* is a fictional spec script attributed to Donald Kaufman, the imaginary twin brother of Charlie Kaufman. The script is a stereotypical psychological thriller about a cop safeguarding a woman from a serial killer. The killer, a literature professor dubbed 'The Deconstructionist,' removes small pieces of his victims’ bodies until they perish. One standout scene involves a chase where the killer escapes on horseback with the girl, while the cop pursues them on a motorcycle, symbolizing a clash between technology and tradition. The twist? The killer, the cop, and the girl are all the same person. While *The 3* is clearly a satire of Hollywood’s formulaic output, I can’t help but want to see that chase scene. In my mind, it’s a surreal blend of *Identity* and *Memento*. Given *Adaptation*’s meta-narrative, how incredible would it be if Nicolas Cage—who played both Charlie and Donald Kaufman—also portrayed the protagonist(s) in this film?