Buzz
I don't have a favorite food. In fact, I can't quite figure out how to classify something as such, since what I feel like eating changes quite a bit depending on the situation. However, there is one food I’ve enjoyed with passion since I first got my teeth: steak.
When you read the word “steak,” you instantly know what I mean. You picture a thick piece of red meat, cut into a plank-like shape. You probably assume it’s from a cow. Perhaps, if you’re a hunter, you might think it’s venison. But at no point would you think I’m talking about cauliflower.
Words have meaning, and no matter how substantial, satisfying, or umami-packed a vegetable may be, it’s simply not a steak. Consider this: have you ever seen “chicken steak” listed on a menu? No, because even the juiciest, most expertly seasoned chicken breast with a golden-brown crust isn’t quite the same as a piece of red meat. (Tuna steaks are an exception, but that’s fine with me.) If I were to show you a piece of chicken and a piece of cauliflower and ask you, “which resembles a cow more?” you would say “the chicken,” because that's true on a cellular level. Yet, in many recipes and on countless menus, it’s the food that has the least in common with a steak that gets called a steak.
This is sheer madness.
This isn’t to suggest that vegetables don’t deserve to be the star of the meal. I’m all for a plant-based dish and don’t feel the need to know where the beef is. The most tiresome type of guy is the one who comments “maybe if you added some bacon” on an article about a perfectly good vegetarian meal. (And it’s always a guy.) What makes vegetables appealing is different from what makes meat appealing, and forcing a vegetable into a form that a “meat eater” would understand is insulting to both the vegetables and their fans.
A grilled eggplant will never replicate the taste of animal flesh. And that’s perfectly okay. In fact, if you don’t like eating animal flesh, it’s wonderful. The secret to crafting a fantastic vegetable dish is respecting and celebrating the vegetable as it is, without trying to force it into a role it wasn’t meant to fill. No amount of marinating, grilling, or rebranding will convince a meat eater that a thick slice of cabbage can replace their rib-eye. By using the term “steak,” you're setting up a comparison that is bound to fail. (A vegetarian, I imagine, doesn’t want their vegetable to remind them of meat, just as a meat eater would never accept a cauliflower plank as a substitute for an actual steak.) I’ve certainly made this mistake in an effort to convince others that a vegetable dish is worth trying, but I’m working on being better. I’m sure I’ve said “you won’t miss the meat” (and I’m sure no one was fooled, and it’s possible the meat was actually missed).
If you genuinely want to eat more vegetables—and encourage others to do the same—you need to appreciate them for what they are, rather than comparing them to what they’re not.
