How to ask the person you like out

Start a conversation with them. If you already know each other, it’ll be easier to invite them out, and they’ll likely say yes. Begin with a simple chat – just casually say "hello" and introduce yourself.

• If you’re in the same class, ask about homework or if they can explain something from the lesson that you didn’t quite get. If you’re in the same club, start the conversation by talking about the club’s activities.
• Ask them about themselves. What do they usually do in a day? Would they be interested in doing something this weekend? Simple, right?

Become friends with them. You don’t have to be best friends or share everything, but friendship builds trust, and you’ll have more credibility in their eyes. Try walking to class together or hanging out with your group of friends. If you both click, feelings could develop.

Be sincere and genuine! Don’t try to make your crush think you’re someone you’re not. Creating a false impression isn’t a good long-term strategy to get them to hang out with you. If you lie, it’ll eventually be uncovered. If you try to act ‘cool’ or mimic someone you think is ‘impressive,’ it could make them uncomfortable. Be yourself!

• When you’re true to yourself and do what you’re genuinely passionate about, your enthusiasm will shine through. Many people find passion incredibly attractive.

Be direct. If you want to ask for their phone number, don’t look for it elsewhere or ask someone else—just ask them directly. If you want to know what they’re doing this weekend, don’t investigate on Facebook, just ask. Following someone around or idolizing them isn’t the way to start a healthy relationship.

Ask outright. If necessary, you can talk over the phone or have a video call, but avoid asking them out through text. While texting might feel easier (especially with someone you like), you know that meeting face-to-face is far more romantic. If you want to make it feel casual and unclear, texting might work, but don’t expect them to be impressed.

Make everything feel natural. Choose a moment when you’re both together, without any pressure or rush. If possible, pick a familiar spot that both of you know, like a place you often hang out or meet. Try to create a smooth and easygoing moment.

Approach them alone. The conversation will likely go much smoother if you’re not confessing your feelings in front of too many people. Many struggle with expressing their emotions in front of others, especially when they become the center of attention. If you don’t have private moments together often, take the initiative to create one. This will be easier if you’re already friends or have a casual relationship.

• Ask them to take a walk with you: from school to home, between classes, or from one building to another. Casually suggest stepping outside for a bit. You could say: "Can I talk to you privately for a moment?" or "Want to walk with me to the next class?"
• Above all, don’t invite someone out in front of their friends! They might feel embarrassed or not want to talk about it in front of others. You might get turned down if you make them feel uncomfortable.

Start with brief conversations. It’s best to ask them out when you both feel ready to hang out one-on-one. Don’t rush into it before you’re comfortable. They might feel more at ease if you ask about their day, crack a joke, or just listen. Both of you should feel comfortable and relaxed.

Wait for the right opportunity. Even the best-laid plans can face setbacks. Maybe you tried to take a walk with them after class, but some mutual friends showed up and joined in. Be patient. You can always ask again tomorrow, but rushing it and creating an awkward moment will only make things harder. Try to pick the best timing.

Be brave! It’s tough to express your feelings to someone you really like. You might feel so nervous that you’re sweating, shaking, and anxious, but everything will get better once you push through. Ask yourself if you’ll regret not asking them out. If the answer is yes, don’t hesitate anymore.

• Think of this like jumping into cold water. You can spend all day staring at the water, feeling the cold through your toes, and imagining how it’ll feel when you jump in. Or, you can set those thoughts aside and just jump. Once you do, all that matters is swimming, adjusting, or getting out.
• If you can’t muster the courage, set yourself a goal. For example: “I have to ask [them] out before Friday, or I’ll be going to the party alone.” You need a reason to stop hesitating and face the fear.

Be straightforward and sincere. Try to simplify things by just stating how you feel. It might sound scary, but you may find it’s actually much simpler than you thought. Just say: "Hey, I want to tell you something. I really like you and would love to spend more time with you. What do you think of me?"

Invite them to do something specific. Don’t just ask them to "hang out" in a vague way. Also, don’t propose being boyfriend/girlfriend if you haven’t gone out together yet. Suggest something fun and casual that both of you would enjoy: going to a movie, hiking, or attending a school event or performance. If you invite them to a place with just the two of you, they might think it’s a date. However, don’t feel pressured to define the relationship just yet; right now, it’s just about asking them out.

• If your school is hosting a dance soon, invite them to be your dance partner. It’s a great opportunity to express your feelings. Keep in mind, unless you’ve already established a relationship, a dance invitation doesn’t necessarily imply a "date" for a couple.

Don’t rush it. Invite them to hang out and let things unfold naturally: as a date. If you’ve already hung out one-on-one a few times and you want to ask them to only "date" you, that’s a different conversation. If they’re still just your crush, don’t rush it; take your time and build a connection first.

Respect their "no". If you ask your crush out and they turn you down, respect their decision. It’s one thing to be genuinely in love with someone and persistent, but stalking, bothering, or making them uncomfortable is something else. Be considerate! The world is full of amazing people you haven’t met yet. Be open and confident, and give it your best shot. Whatever the answer, you won’t regret it.