How to Banish Sadness

Many people consider sadness a problem or a negative emotion. Usually, when someone feels sad, they try to ignore or hide their sadness. However, this is a natural emotional response to life's challenges. While feeling sad is a natural emotion, you should also learn how to overcome it. This will help you address the issues you're facing and improve your mood.

Allow yourself to cry. Let go of the sadness, frustration, and pain within you. Some people realize that crying helps them feel better, as it is a way to express emotions outwardly and improve their mood. Additionally, crying can make you feel lighter. Some studies show that tears can reduce stress hormones. After crying, lie down and reflect on what happened.

• If reflecting makes you uncomfortable, cry again. No one can see you, so don’t hesitate. Let yourself release your emotions freely.

Write a journal about your emotions. Find a quiet space where you can reflect. Try to describe in as much detail as possible your feelings, the situation unfolding, and how frustrated you feel. Don’t forget to note any emotions expressed outwardly. This could help you understand the underlying emotions behind your sadness. You can even write a letter to yourself if you struggle to express your feelings on paper.

Dance or listen to sad music. Recent studies show that dancing can improve mental health, including sadness, fatigue, anxiety, and other physical health symptoms. You can take formal dance classes or simply move to the music at home. Research also indicates that listening to sad music is very helpful when you're feeling down. Sad music connects with your emotions and helps you process those feelings.

• If you aren’t ready to release your emotions yet, music can help you temporarily forget until you’re ready to face the sadness.

Engage in creative art. Creating art is a way to express your sadness through colors, shapes, and sometimes structure. Art helps relieve sadness without the need for words. You should try:

• Mindfulness exercises: Start by visualizing your feelings. Close your eyes and imagine what your emotions look like, their colors, shapes, etc. Then open your eyes and draw that image on paper. Don’t worry about how it looks. Just let the emotions flow, no matter what the image is.
• Mandala art: This is a complex circular design that you can color or paint to release emotions. Search online for printable mandala designs. Some people are really drawn to this type of subconscious art.

Recognize negative thoughts. Negative thinking is often unrealistic and relates to circumstances, oneself, or future events. This type of thinking can overshadow positive thoughts and alter your view of yourself. If you fail to recognize negative thought patterns, it will be difficult to develop healthy coping skills. Negative self-thoughts can lead to depression.

• For example, you might feel sad after a breakup. Afterward, most people have negative thoughts such as: 'I’m not a good partner,' or 'I’ll always be alone.'
• If you start believing these negative thoughts, your actions will reinforce them. For instance, you may avoid dating again because you believe you will always be alone.

Identify the root cause of negative thinking. Reflect on the concerns behind your negative thoughts. For instance, if you feel you will always be alone, the underlying anxiety may stem from a lack of self-confidence when meeting new people. While becoming aware of your emotions might be uncomfortable, it's crucial to understand what is causing these negative thoughts in the first place.

• You could try keeping a thought journal by writing down situations you wish had turned out differently or moments when you could have acted better. Track any sadness or circumstances surrounding these emotions.
• For example, your initial negative thought might be "I’m a failure because I’ve never had a good date." The hidden cause of this thought could be your sadness over a broken relationship, and the loneliness you feel after your plans for a date fell through.

Fight and eliminate negative thoughts. Simply ask yourself whether that thought is truly real. This can help you realize that most of your thoughts are unreal and merely natural responses. You can also ask yourself the following questions to eliminate negative thinking:

• Why do you believe this thought is real? What triggers it? "I don't even know how to ask someone out on a date. I don’t know how to do it."
• How do you react to this negative thought (emotionally, physically, and in behavior)? "I feel scared and anxious when asking someone out on a date."
• How will this thought change your actions or behaviors? "I shouldn’t be scared. I should’ve asked someone out when I was ready."

Respect your emotions. It’s okay to feel sad, so don’t suppress your emotions. Accepting your feelings is the first step towards overcoming sadness. You may feel down for some reason, but it’s important to embrace your sorrow and pain. In doing so, you can begin the process of letting your sadness fade away. If you struggle to accept your emotions, try writing or saying out loud:

• "I’m very sad because ……………………….. But I’m going to be okay."
• "I’m allowed to feel sad about …...."

Don’t let anyone undermine your emotions. Often, family and friends try to comfort you with good intentions by saying that your sadness will pass or that there are still good things in the situation. Even when they mean well by trying to soothe you, this can still be a form of dismissing your valid sadness. Let them know that you appreciate their intentions, but you are feeling sad and need time to process your emotions.

• For instance, if you’ve just gone through a breakup and a friend tells you that now you’ll have more free time, it’s better to tell them that you need time to soothe your feelings.

Start speaking to yourself positively or make decisive statements. Remind yourself of your achievements and everything you love about yourself. Alternatively, recall some positive quotes or affirmations that resonate with you. You can write down a list of these quotes and keep them with you whenever you're feeling down. Research shows that carrying a reminder with your affirmations can help you encourage and protect your positive mindset.

• To keep a few positive or decisive quotes with you, write them on a checklist card and store them in your wallet, keep them in your phone, or set them as your computer background.

Spend time talking to others. Stay close to family and friends as they may understand your emotions. Explain how you're feeling and see if this helps you feel better. Most likely, they will try to comfort you. Don’t hesitate to tell them that you’re feeling sad and need time to process it.

• Try talking to someone you trust, perhaps someone older or wiser. They often have the life experience to help you work through your sorrow.

Let yourself forget the sadness by engaging in positive activities. It's easy to focus on negative emotions while overlooking the positive ones like happiness, comfort, excitement, joy, and motivation. Take time to write down happy and pleasant memories. This can help you regain a positive mindset. You can also distract yourself from negative feelings by doing something enjoyable and uplifting, such as:

• Coloring your hair
• Brewing a cup of tea
• Counting to 500 or 1000
• Solving puzzles or playing brain games
• Trying 'people watching'
• Playing a musical instrument
• Watching TV or going to the movies
• Painting your nails
• Tidying up items like books or clothes
• Folding paper to keep your hands busy
• Exercising, playing sports, walking, or working out

Know when to seek professional help. If your sadness lasts for more than a month, you might be experiencing depression and may need counseling or professional support. Symptoms of depression are more severe than sadness and include losing interest in daily activities, irritability, anxiety, decreased libido, trouble focusing, sleep pattern changes, and feeling constantly fatigued. If you notice signs of serious suicidal thoughts, seek help immediately. Go to the emergency room or call emergency services. Warning signs of suicide include:

• Threatening or talking about suicide, including searching for suicide plans online
• Comments implying you don't care about anything or don't want anyone around anymore
• Statements like you're a burden to others
• Feeling trapped
• Experiencing uncontrollable pain
• Giving away personal belongings, writing a will, or planning a funeral
• Purchasing a weapon or firearm
• Suddenly becoming unexpectedly cheerful after a period of depression
• Above all, remember to love yourself as you are.
• Do things that help you feel better.