How to Change Diapers for Teenagers

Observe the signs. Pay attention to indicators that the child needs a diaper change. If the child has a bowel movement, the odor is usually noticeable, the child may assume a recognizable “pooping” posture, and you might even hear loud gas sounds.

• The frequency of bowel movements depends on various factors (e.g., health conditions, etc.). However, be prepared to change diapers (or assist when needed) approximately 5 to 8 times a day.
• If possible, encourage the child to change their own diaper if they are capable. Schedule diaper changes and adjust as needed when the diaper becomes heavily soiled.

Head to the diaper-changing area. If at home, you can go to the bathroom or another spacious room. If outdoors, this can be more challenging. Take the child to a public restroom, preferably a spacious and accessible one, or a family restroom if available. The changing area should be clean and spacious enough for both of you. Many public restrooms also have diaper-changing tables.

• If you're with others, you can say, 'We’ll be right back, just need to step away for a moment,' and then leave.
• If possible, choose a restroom with hooks or shelves to place your diaper-changing supplies.

Maintain privacy. Always lock the bathroom door when changing the child's diaper. If someone is outside, politely ask for some privacy. Similarly, in public spaces, use a soft tone and avoid loud complaints to prevent embarrassing the child.

Organize necessary supplies. If not at home, carry a bag with the following items: diapers, disposable pads, wipes, diaper rash cream, a pair of gloves, and hand sanitizer. Keep these items within reach for convenience during the diaper change. If the child is capable, ask them to assist by holding the clean wipes or a fresh diaper.

• In addition to disposable pads, you can use a shower curtain, a waterproof picnic blanket, or a soft vinyl mat to lay down for the diaper change.
• To avoid forgetting or running out of supplies, double-check the diaper bag before leaving home to ensure nothing is missing.
• If in a public restroom without space to lay out supplies, keep them in the bag and retrieve items as needed, minimizing contamination.

Adjust the space as needed. Move objects around to create more floor space if necessary. Also, consider the room temperature. Extreme heat or cold can make diaper changes uncomfortable. Adjust the air conditioning if possible and needed.

Prepare the diaper-changing position. The appropriate position for changing a diaper depends on the child's mobility. Standing is the easiest, but if the child cannot stand or the diaper is too heavy, you can arrange to change the diaper while the child is lying down.

• When changing a diaper in a lying position, place a disposable pad on the floor or bed. If using a changing table, wipe the surface with a disinfectant wipe.
• If changing the diaper in a sitting position, spread the pad on a chair.
• For a standing position, place the pad on the floor near a wall if the child needs support.

Wash your hands or use hand sanitizer. Many people prefer wearing plastic gloves at this stage. The goal is to prevent the transfer of bacteria from your hands to the child and vice versa.

Change the diaper in a standing position. Generally, this is the best option for the child as it is less stressful and quickest. This position also requires minimal space, making it suitable for small restrooms or tight spaces. Start by laying the pad on the floor, ask the child to stand on it, and pull their pants down to their ankles.

• Keep the diaper in place and undo the side tabs. Use your other hand to clean the child's back. Once done, pull the diaper down, clean the front with a wipe, and dispose of the diaper and used wipes in the trash.
• If the child needs support while standing, let them hold onto a grab bar (if available), use a cane, lean against a wall, or hold onto your shoulder for balance.
• If the diaper is heavily soiled, be cautious when changing in this position to avoid staining clothes or making a mess.

Change the diaper in a sitting position. You can change the diaper in this position if there is a seat available (e.g., a chair in a family restroom) or if the child can lift themselves slightly while sitting (such as in a wheelchair) but cannot stand independently. Place the child on the pre-laid pad. If the child is already seated, lift them slightly to slide the pad underneath and pull their pants down.

• Let the child remain seated while you undo the diaper tabs. Ask the child to lift themselves slightly to pull the diaper down, clean the back and front, then remove the diaper and dispose of it along with the used wipes.
• Note that changing a diaper in a sitting position requires the child to have some control over their upper body movements. However, if necessary, the child can sit directly on the pad during the change.

Change the diaper in a lying position. This position can make the child feel vulnerable and embarrassed, as it resembles how infants are cared for. However, for teenagers with limited mobility or frequent bowel movements, this is often the most practical option, and some may even prefer it due to familiarity. Begin by helping the child lie down on a disposable pad placed on the floor, a changing table (if available), or a bed (if at home). Then, remove the child's pants, including any protective waterproof underwear. Loosen the diaper tabs but do not remove it entirely.

• Gently hold the child's knees with your arm and bring them closer to their chest. Clean the child from front to back, placing used wipes inside the diaper. Once cleaned, remove the soiled diaper.
• While removing the pants, check for leaks. If the pants are wet or soiled, replace them, including waterproof underwear if necessary. Place wet or dirty clothes in a plastic bag.

Ensure the child's bottom is thoroughly cleaned. Regardless of the position, use plenty of wipes to clean the child. If possible, encourage the child to do this themselves.

• Use alcohol-free and fragrance-free wipes to avoid skin irritation.
• After cleaning, place the used wipes inside the diaper and dispose of them in the trash.
• Wipe from front to back to prevent the spread of bacteria, especially for female and transgender male children.

Apply diaper rash cream. After cleaning, apply a zinc-based cream to the diaper area to prevent rashes. This is especially important for children who wear diapers regularly. Since this step involves direct contact with the child's body, those with sufficient mobility may prefer to do it themselves.

• Consider using a spray-on rash cream, which some children may prefer as it avoids hand application.
• If you notice dark red or raised rashes on the child's skin, consult a doctor. Prolonged rashes can lead to infections and other health issues.

Put on the new diaper and pants. Take a fresh diaper, position it between the child's legs, and secure the tabs on both sides. Ensure the diaper fits snugly without gaps around the legs or waist and does not restrict movement. Once done, help the child put their pants back on.

• In a standing position, use one hand to hold the diaper in place and the other to fasten the tabs.
• In a sitting position, lift the child slightly to slide the diaper into place and secure it.
• In a lying position, have the child bend their knees when placing the diaper and straighten their legs when fastening it.

Dispose of the soiled diaper and used supplies. Place the dirty diaper in a trash bin or a designated diaper disposal container. Clean up any wipes that may have fallen on the floor or other surfaces. Finally, do a quick check to ensure everything is clean and restored to its original state.

Wash your hands again. After completing the diaper change, wash your hands or use hand sanitizer, regardless of whether you wore gloves. Also, wash the child's hands or ask them to do it themselves.

Pack up the supplies. Don’t forget to place all the diaper-changing items back into the diaper bag before leaving. Sometimes, wipes can be easily overlooked in a hurry. You can ask the child to help by saying, 'Do you see anything we’re forgetting? Are we ready to go?'

Stay calm. To keep both yourself and the child calm, you can say, 'It’s okay, everything is fine,' or 'No worries, we’ve done this many times before.' If the child refuses to cooperate, give them a moment by saying, 'Alright, are you busy right now? Let’s do this in five minutes.'

• If you feel frustrated or tempted to speak harshly, take a deep breath and count to five to regain composure.

Show empathy toward the child. Understand that the child may feel embarrassed about needing a diaper change. Minimize this by changing diapers only in private spaces, such as a bathroom. Avoid discussing their need for diapers excessively and approach the topic of diaper changes tactfully.

• Engage the child in conversation and ask for their input on how to make the process easier and less stressful or embarrassing for them.

Handle aggressive resistance from the child. Some children may resist during diaper changes. If this happens, prepare yourself by staying calm and maintaining control. Avoid restraining or punishing the child, as this can lead to further issues.

• Redirect the child's aggression by asking them to help prepare supplies. For example, say, 'Wow, you’re so strong! Can you use that strength to help me? If you help, we’ll finish much faster.'
• Explain that you’re trying to help them and that they shouldn’t hurt you. You can say, 'I know you’re upset, but you can’t hit me. Please stop.'
• If you feel unsafe, pause the diaper change and try again in about 15 minutes when the child has calmed down.

Use positive reinforcement. If the child frequently resists diaper changes, praise them when the process goes smoothly. For example, say, 'Thank you for helping me! You made this so much quicker!'

• Encourage future cooperation. For instance, say, 'If we go a whole week without arguing during diaper changes, we’ll go to your favorite restaurant.'
• Make diaper-changing time more positive for both of you. Use this time to talk about other things instead of focusing on the diaper change itself.

Seek assistance. If you struggle to change the child’s diaper, especially during aggressive resistance, ask the child to help or seek support from others. For example, at home, call another family member to assist. Choose someone the child trusts and ask if they’re willing to help. Treat this as a last resort, as involving others may intrude on the child’s privacy.

• Typically, you don’t need to layer multiple diapers on the child. Most children only need to use the bathroom every few hours.
• Work quickly during diaper changes. Teenagers often feel that diaper changes disrupt their daily activities and prefer the process to be as fast and discreet as possible.
• If the child frequently urinates or has bowel movements, consider using waterproof underwear to prevent leaks. This also helps reduce unpleasant odors during bowel movements.
• Try to establish a fixed room for diaper changes and keep necessary supplies easily accessible. Create a safe, stress-free environment at home, making diaper changes a normal part of the family routine. If the child requires a changing table or chair, place it in a private area inaccessible to guests. Store clean diapers and clothes in the same room and use a large, sturdy bin for soiled diapers. Ensure the room is well-ventilated to avoid lingering odors.
• If the child will need diapers regularly in the future (due to medical or other reasons), teach them to handle some steps independently if possible. For example, they can learn to prepare supplies or clean up afterward, reducing their reliance on parents.
• When the child no longer needs diapers, consider donating any leftover supplies to nonprofit organizations that assist individuals in need, such as disability centers.
• Give the child some privacy during diaper changes. Avoid rushing to check their diaper; they will let you know when a change is needed.

• Avoid showing disgust during diaper changes, especially when dealing with bowel movements. Changing diapers for infants is already challenging for many, and it becomes even more difficult with teenagers. However, over time, you’ll almost get used to it, and it will become a routine task—similar to caring for a newborn.
• Do not punish or scold the child for needing frequent diaper changes. This can worsen the situation, create negative feelings, and make toilet training (if possible) more difficult and slower.
• Sometimes, the child may urinate or have a bowel movement during the diaper change. Use a waterproof pad underneath and keep a towel handy as a temporary liner to handle accidents without scolding the child.
  • The child will likely feel deeply embarrassed, as accidents during diaper changes are often seen as very childish. If the child can recognize their need to use the bathroom, encourage them to inform you before it’s too late.
• Note that many people find the term “diaper” offensive when referring to teenagers or adults. They prefer terms like “protective underwear.”
• If the child expresses a desire to wear diapers, it could be due to “paraphilic infantilism” (adult baby syndrome). If you suspect this or notice signs of depression or excessive anxiety, consult a doctor for advice.

• Diapers
• Diaper rash cream
• Waterproof pads
• Diaper bag
• Wipes
• Rubber gloves
• Hand sanitizer