How to Choose the Right Outfit for a Funeral

A funeral is a somber event, and it’s important to show respect by dressing appropriately. Funeral attire is generally dark and conservative. Choose dark-colored clothing and limit accessories. In some cases, the family may request a specific color for the outfit, in which case, it’s acceptable to bypass the usual customs. However, always remember that the wishes of the deceased's family take precedence during the ceremony.

Choose black or dark-colored clothing. Typically, funeral attire is black. However, not everyone strictly follows this tradition. You might see people wearing dark grey or navy blue to funerals. If you decide not to wear black, ensure your outfit is in a dark, somber color.

• Choose neutral dark colors instead of black. Navy blue, charcoal grey, dark green, and brown are all suitable options.
• However, it’s important to consider the type of funeral before selecting your outfit. For traditional services, it’s advisable to stick with classic black clothing.

Avoid bright colors. You should refrain from wearing bright-colored clothing to a funeral. Colors like blue, red, and yellow can be unsettling or may seem disrespectful. In certain cultures, red is associated with celebrations. Red, in particular, should be avoided.

• Never incorporate vibrant colors into your outfit. A black dress with a pink hem or a black suit with a red shirt underneath is inappropriate for a funeral.
• However, this rule does not apply in rare cases. Family members may request bright clothing as a way to honor the deceased. Always follow the family's wishes in these instances.

Follow the dress code unless otherwise specified. Funerals are somber occasions. You should dress as if attending a job interview, not as if you're going out. In some cases, the family may request more casual attire to honor the deceased. However, unless otherwise instructed, adhere to the traditional dress code.

• Black, dark gray, or navy are appropriate colors. A matching tie and dark pants are suitable. You may also opt for a dark shirt and tie.
• Women should wear long dresses or skirts to funerals. Avoid form-fitting outfits, as they may appear more suitable for casual outings rather than a serious occasion. A long coat and dark pants are also appropriate options.

Consider sleeve length. In general, avoid revealing clothing when attending a funeral. It's best to avoid sleeveless or short-sleeved shirts. Instead, opt for long-sleeve attire. If you wish to wear a sleeveless black dress, you can cover your arms with a shawl or long-sleeve jacket.

Opt for solid-colored clothing rather than patterns. Patterned outfits can be acceptable for funerals as long as they are not too bold. A floral dress or a dark-striped shirt may be appropriate. However, you should avoid bright, flashy patterns, especially if they include vibrant colors. For example, a black shirt with red polka dots would be unsuitable for a funeral.

• Nonetheless, always respect the family's wishes. In some cases, they may request specific patterned attire.

Choose formal yet comfortable footwear. This is especially important when attending a funeral or memorial service. Funerals often require standing or walking for long periods, so it's essential to wear comfortable shoes. High heels, for example, are not a suitable choice. Opt for formal shoes in darker colors.

• Black shoes or sandals are the best option. You can also wear dark green, navy blue, grey, or black shoes for funerals.
• If the service is less formal, dark-colored sneakers can be acceptable. However, always lean towards a more formal look.

Wear a simple tie. Avoid flashy ties. In general, you should steer clear of brightly colored or boldly patterned ties. It's best to choose a plain tie or one without any patterns for a funeral. Opt for darker colors such as dark green, navy blue, or grey.

• However, there are exceptions. If you are wearing a tie that was gifted by the deceased, the family might appreciate this gesture. It's best to check beforehand to avoid any misunderstandings.

Keep makeup minimal. If you wear makeup, keep it subtle when attending a funeral. Funerals are generally solemn events, and just like at work, you should avoid excessive or bold makeup for such occasions.

• A light foundation and nude-colored lipstick (flesh tone) are ideal. If desired, apply a thin layer of blush, as well as light eye shadow and mascara.
• However, exceptions may occur depending on the wishes of the family. For example, if you are attending the funeral of someone from the theater, the family might request more vivid and noticeable makeup.

Wear traditional jewelry. If you're uncertain about the appropriate type of jewelry, it's best not to wear any when attending a funeral. In fact, not wearing jewelry can make your outfit look more somber. If you do choose to wear jewelry, opt for traditional pieces. A pearl necklace, for instance, is a better choice than a loud, flashy necklace.

• If wearing earrings, choose a formal style. Dangling earrings with large sizes or round, bold earrings are too noticeable for a funeral. Instead, go for small, discrete stud earrings.

Pick a pocket square that matches your attire. If your suit includes a pocket square, it should also be in a dark color. Colors like navy blue, dark green, and grey are appropriate. Generally, a pink pocket square is not suitable for a funeral outfit.

Note religious beliefs. Religious ceremonies often follow specific guidelines regarding attire. You should research the religion of the deceased and check if there are any dress code rules for the funeral. Always show respect for the deceased’s beliefs.

• For example, some beliefs may require women to dress modestly for a funeral. Avoid wearing short dresses or skirts.
• You can look up religious customs online, but it’s best to ask a family member for guidance. They can direct you on the appropriate attire.

Respect cultural traditions. If the deceased belonged to a different culture, certain colors may be more appropriate. While dark colors are traditionally worn at funerals in Western cultures, other cultures may not follow this rule.

• In fact, some cultures prefer bright colors at funerals. In Korea, funeral attire is blue, while in Egypt and Ethiopia, yellow is seen as the color for mourning clothes.
• In Middle Eastern countries, white is the color traditionally worn at funerals.

Consider the weather. If the funeral or burial is held outdoors, keep this in mind. You may need an umbrella if it rains or a warm jacket if it’s cold. Ensure that these accessories are still respectful for the occasion.

• Even when choosing items like raincoats and umbrellas, remember you are attending a funeral. Bright pink umbrellas are not suitable for a solemn atmosphere. Dark-colored umbrellas and raincoats are generally the best option.
• It’s also best to choose a dark-colored jacket or coat. Wearing a white jacket to an outdoor funeral is considered inappropriate.

Follow the deceased's wishes. You should always respect special requests, even if they go against conventional norms. If the family asks for specific colors or patterns for the funeral, you should try to honor this request. If the family has planned a different way to send off the deceased, follow their wishes rather than traditional guidelines.

• If you're uncertain, it's a good idea to inquire about the family's dress code or seek someone else's opinion to ensure your outfit is appropriate.
• For highly conservative ceremonies, some women may wear a simple, elegant hat.
• The family might opt to hold a memorial. If you're unsure, don't hesitate to ask what type of attire would be suitable.
• If the funeral takes place in early November and you're living in the United Kingdom (or any Commonwealth country), you should consider wearing a poppy flower on your attire.
• Wearing yellow attire to a funeral is considered inappropriate in Egypt. Only all-black clothing is acceptable in Egypt and Arab countries. Avoid wearing foreign attire and choose dark or possibly grey colors. You should aim to avoid drawing attention to yourself.

• Opt for waterproof mascara and keep your eye makeup or eyeliner simple.
• Offer your seat or umbrella to elderly individuals or women with young children.
• High heels may make walking on grassy terrain difficult, especially if it has recently rained.