Buzz
Workplace bullying refers to repeated behaviors intentionally targeting an individual with the goal of humiliating, embarrassing, or diminishing their work performance. These acts may come from colleagues, supervisors, or managers and are a real concern for employees at all levels. It's not just a minor issue. By learning to recognize and address bullying behaviors in the workplace, you can help create a healthier and more effective environment for both yourself and your coworkers. Keep reading the article below to learn more.
Steps
Understand Workplace Bullying Behavior
Identify who the bully is and what they are doing. Much like schoolyard bullies, workplace bullies use threats and actions to bring you down. Learning to recognize their behavior is the first step to stopping the bullying and restoring a comfortable work atmosphere.
- Bullies get satisfaction from tormenting others. While you may not get along with everyone at work, it doesn't mean you should be bullied or become a bully. Distinguish between the two by recognizing the following—does the person seem to always cause trouble for you, sabotage your work, or try to put you down? Do they appear to enjoy doing so? If so, they might be a bully.
- Bullies often have deep-rooted psychological issues related to control. Knowing this can reduce their chances of interfering with your work and privacy while allowing you to spot their weaknesses.
Recognizing bullying behaviors. Review the signs below to distinguish bullying from simple misunderstandings or individual conflicts. Workplace bullying may include:
- Yelling, whether in private, in front of coworkers, or clients
- Calling someone out by name
- Disrespectful or degrading comments
- Excessive supervision or criticizing others' work
- Intentionally overloading someone with tasks, making them overwhelmed
- Sabotaging someone's work to cause their failure
- Deliberately withholding information, preventing them from doing their job effectively
- Purposely ignoring someone during a meeting or at the office, making them feel excluded
The following signs outside the workplace may indicate you're being bullied. You might be experiencing workplace bullying if you notice these signs at home:
- Difficulty sleeping or feeling nauseous because you're afraid to go to work
- Your family notices you're overwhelmed and obsessed with work issues
- You spend your vacation stressing about returning to work the next day
- Your doctor warns you about health issues like high blood pressure or stress-related conditions
- You feel guilty about the problems at your workplace
Don’t ignore the feeling that you're being bullied. If you feel isolated or like you're being treated unfairly for your efforts, you may just be making excuses. Thoughts like, “Everyone is treated this way,” or “I deserve this” are often guilt-driven emotions that bullies impose on you. Don’t fall into self-loathing if you’re feeling bullied. Create a plan to stop the abuse and restore a healthy work environment.
- Unlike schoolyard bullies who target weaker, isolated peers, workplace bullies often pick on employees they perceive as threats to their position or career. If your presence makes someone feel vulnerable, they may try to sabotage you. Consider it a hidden compliment: You’re good at what you do, and you know it. Don’t let them confuse you.
Action
Ask the bully to stop. This may sound easier said than done, but you can have some phrases or gestures ready to use when you feel bullied.
- Raise your hand, creating a barrier between you and the bully, similar to a police officer's stop sign.
- Say something short but assertive to express your discomfort, such as: "Please stop so I can work" or "Please don’t say that again." This will help you resist the behavior and provide evidence for a report if the bullying continues.
- Never respond to bullying with similar behavior. Yelling or insulting back can make things worse or put you in trouble. Use a calm, even tone when asking the person to stop, as if you were talking to a dog chewing on your shoes.
Document every instance of bullying. Record the name of the person causing you distress, and how they are bullying you. Note the specific time, date, location, and any witnesses who observed the event. Gather as much information as possible. Collecting this data is crucial and the most concrete step to stopping the bullying when you present this information to higher-ups or legal authorities.
- Even if you're unsure whether you're being bullied, keeping a journal of your feelings can help you understand what you're experiencing and reveal the challenges you're facing. By writing down your emotions and discomfort, you'll be able to determine whether you're truly being bullied, or if you need to take action because it’s happening.
Find witnesses. Always consult with colleagues when you feel you're being bullied, and make sure they are willing to support you by adding to your evidence. Ask them to document the events for future reference. Choose someone who works at the same time as you or sits near your desk.
- If bullying tends to occur at specific times or places, have your witness stay in the area where you expect it to happen. Bring your colleague along to meetings where your supervisor usually bullies you. That way, you'll have support when things escalate, and you'll gather evidence for later.
- If you're being bullied, others might be as well. Unite to confront the common adversary.
Stay calm and wait for the right moment. Make sure you’ve gathered evidence and that you’re calm. Rushing to your boss in an emotional state could make you appear whiny or overly reactive, while the issue is much more serious. If you're calm, you’ll present yourself more clearly and have a better chance of improving your work environment.
- Wait until the next day after being bullied before reporting it to your boss. If you're being bullied in real-time and have to wait before talking to your boss, try to avoid the bully. Stay calm and continue working. If you anticipate more bullying, you'll be better prepared to handle it.
Schedule a meeting with your manager or HR representative. Bring your collected evidence, witnesses, and present your case as calmly as possible. Practice what you plan to say before the meeting if needed. Keep your complaint brief and polite, and complete any forms that your manager provides.
- Don’t propose a solution unless your boss asks. In other words, avoid saying something like, “He should be fired for bullying me.” Present your case strongly and provide as much evidence as possible, saying, “I’m upset by this behavior and can’t let it continue, so I think you need to know.” Let your manager decide the appropriate action.
- If your boss is the one bullying you, reach out to their manager or HR. This isn’t a military hierarchy, so there’s no “ultimate commander.” Speak to someone who can help.
Keep following up. If the bullying continues without being addressed or if no changes are made, you have the right to escalate it to higher management or even HR. Continue until your complaint is taken seriously, and the situation is resolved, allowing you to work in a friendly environment.
- Sometimes, proposing a compromise might improve the situation for you. If your boss’s superior agrees that bullying occurred but refuses to fire your boss, would you be open to a transfer? Would you be willing to work from home? What changes would make the situation better for you? Think seriously about these options in case you need them in the future.
- If you present evidence and nothing changes or the situation worsens, consider hiring a lawyer and taking legal action. Provide them with the necessary documentation to pursue appropriate legal steps.
Recovery After Being Bullied
Prioritize improving yourself. You won't remain an effective employee or a happy person if you don't take the time to recover from bullying. Allow yourself to take a break and step away from work for a bit.
- If you’ve shown your best side to your boss, you could be a strong candidate for a company-sponsored vacation. Take advantage of this opportunity.
Engage in meaningful activities that bring you joy outside of work. After all, work is called work for a reason, and not something that should be your sole source of joy. Even with a healthy work environment, it's important to step away from it and take a break to refresh both your spirit and mind. If you’ve experienced bullying and want to feel better, you should:
- Spend time on your old hobbies
- Read more books
- Start dating
- Spend time with friends and family
Talk to a doctor or therapist. You may need more support than you can provide for yourself. Psychological therapy or medication may be necessary if you've been under the pressure of a bully for an extended period.
Change jobs. Even if the bully has been dealt with, you might feel more at ease by seeking opportunities elsewhere. View all of these experiences as opportunities rather than obstacles. If you're unhappy at your current job, consider expanding your skills in a different field, moving to a new work environment, or transferring to a different branch of the company. These changes could offer you a fresh perspective on life and work.
Preventing Bullying as an Employer
Implement a zero-tolerance policy for workplace bullying. All health and safety policies should be accompanied by guidelines addressing bullying. Ensure that these measures are supported by management and are strictly enforced at all levels within the organization.
- Incorporate this into an open policy and organize meetings to guide the anti-bullying efforts at work, ensuring that employees at all levels are aware of this behavior.
Address bullying behaviors immediately. It's easy to sit back and hope the problem will resolve itself, thinking that your employees will sort things out. This won’t happen! Don’t allow issues to fester between your employees if you want a healthy, productive, and efficient workplace.
- Take complaints seriously and thoroughly investigate them. Even if the complaints seem to come from overly sensitive employees or misunderstandings, they still deserve your attention.
Eliminate competition. Often, bullying arises from a sense of competition in the workplace, where employees feel threatened by each other's skills and try to undermine their achievements through psychological warfare. This creates an unfriendly environment and deep-rooted problems that are hard to fix.
- Workplace competition is based on the belief that employees want to be the best and will work harder when rewarded for their success. While competition can sometimes boost productivity, it can also corrupt employees and create a hostile, unfriendly atmosphere.
Encourage interaction and manage employees. The more you engage with your workforce at all levels, the less likely issues will arise compared to letting them work among themselves. As in the book Lord of the Flies—"don't leave the children's parents far away on an island, and the children will be fine."
Advice
- Be yourself and feel comfortable with who you are. Don’t believe the nonsense others say and don’t let them make you lose your sense of self.
- Don’t trust the misguided statements like “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me!” or “Boys/girls don’t cry when they grow up.” Words can truly hurt and leave deep scars, and bullying can cause immense emotional pain and tears.
- Never listen to what a bully says to you; doing so will only damage your self-esteem.
- Don’t retaliate against a bully – Doing so could cause you to lose control, and you may end up being blamed instead of the bully.
- A bully may interrogate the victim with questions similar to a “police interrogation” or “cross-examination.” This questioning can make the victim afraid to open up and feel as though they are the problem instead of the bully, making them anxious, cautious, and more isolated.
- Be cautious of rumors or negative comments disguised as jokes. If it hurts you, then it has already hurt you.
- Keep a journal of all bullying incidents and preserve any evidence, such as emails or work-related documents, for future complaints.
- When faced with unpleasant comments, the best thing to do is stay silent and walk away. Or, simply respond with one word to show that you’re not interested in the bullies’ nonsense.
- Think about your reactions. If things seem to escalate, make sure you have a witness for any future actions. Most people will ensure that their witness sees that they will not tolerate such treatment again and won’t accept such behavior in any situation.
- Keep speaking your mind. Remember, you are not alone.
- If things seem to be getting worse, don’t hesitate to see a doctor and take sick leave or time off.
- Remember, you’re not fabricating anything when you report bullying – You and everyone else deserve to be safe, treated fairly, and free from any form of bullying. Continue speaking out until someone listens and takes you seriously.
- Prepare to seek legal help if the company’s ineffective procedures and HR department don’t offer a solution.
- You can warn the bully that if their behavior doesn’t stop, you will have no choice but to report them to management for causing harm to your ability to perform effectively at work.
Warning
- Any form of harassment, whether physical or emotional, poses a threat to your health and well-being. Report it to management and seek legal advice if necessary.
