How to Get Married

Planning the Proposal. How can you surprise your future spouse (hopefully!) with delight and/or a touch of surprise when you ask the big question? It’s a romantic moment that almost everyone dreams of, so you need to plan ahead and do it thoughtfully. Consider locations, timing, and the words you will say. Think about your partner’s likes—restaurants, activities, and/or songs they’ve loved but haven’t had the chance to enjoy in a while. Use these to create the backdrop for your proposal.

• Sincere, simple words have a far greater impact than exaggerated, flowery speech. If you want to make a strong impression, prepare a proposal that comes straight from the heart.

Buying the Engagement Ring. Since you're the one initiating the proposal, it's naturally your responsibility to choose the engagement ring. Consider what your partner likes and dislikes. If possible, observe their jewelry preferences and avoid picking gems or colors that they don’t wear or don’t have in their usual jewelry collection.

• You can try to subtly gauge your partner’s opinion on engagement ring styles, but make sure to do this well in advance so they forget about it by the time you’re ready to buy.
• Don’t feel pressured to spend a fortune on an expensive ring. What matters is what the ring represents. Besides, the wedding itself will likely cost quite a bit already.

Proposing. Keep the engagement ring safely stored and enjoy a day or evening with your partner. Be polite, create a fun and positive atmosphere. When the right moment comes, kneel before them, take out the ring, and say what’s in your heart. If you’re lucky, you’ll get a yes.

• Propose in front of a crowd if you can. The presence of witnesses will help show your partner that you're ready for marriage, regardless of what others think. And the crowd will likely enjoy the proposal as well.

Start Planning the Wedding. Once everything has gone smoothly and you're engaged, it’s time to begin planning the wedding and honeymoon. Even a simple wedding requires consideration of the time and place; most people, however, want a more formal ceremony, whether or not it includes religious rites. Formal weddings usually require a lot of event planning skills and can be costly. Don’t forget to make a gift list to help your guests pick wedding presents.

• Discuss wedding plans with close family. Ask for the input of parents and older family members. They are usually happy to help with planning and might even contribute to the wedding expenses.

Choose the Date and Location. Usually, people don't rush to marry right after the engagement so they can savor this special time. This may be the only engagement period in your life. After both of you have chosen a good date, you can find someone authorized by a relevant agency to register your marriage. It's a good idea to call ahead and schedule an appointment.

Preparation. Arrive at the venue a little earlier and bring at least one witness with you. Whether or not you wear wedding attire is up to you: only the officiant and the witnesses will see the two of you there.

Marriage ceremony. Follow the officiant's instructions and recite your vows. Kiss your partner when the ceremony concludes. Typically, you can receive your marriage certificate on the same day; the cost varies by region but is usually affordable. The marriage certificate serves as proof of your union for tax purposes and other official matters. Once you have it, there’s no need for renewals.

Choosing the venue. Most religious individuals prefer to have their wedding ceremony in a church. However, if you prefer a traditional ceremony, there are many other options. Besides rented banquet halls, you can also consider parks, family estates, or even yachts. Some couples even opt for skydiving weddings! Discuss with your partner to find a venue that suits both your preferences and budget.

Pick a theme. For those wanting a traditional church ceremony, the rituals will generally follow conventional practices; but for others, this is the moment to choose. Don't forget your likes and dislikes. This is a life-changing event, so make sure the wedding reflects your core values and beliefs. This doesn't mean you can't choose fun and whimsical themes, but remember the profound significance of the day.

• Traditional weddings are fascinating, especially when both families share a similar culture or are willing to blend different traditions. Feel free to make adjustments, especially if you don’t want everything in the ceremony to strictly follow tradition. For example, combining Celtic-Irish cultural elements, like a harp-playing musician in a silk robe, creates a perfect cultural theme for a wedding.
• Weddings based on shared interests and styles can be exciting and engaging for everyone involved, as they allow you to combine traditional elements and introduce unique twists. The main consideration here is the cost: Gothic-themed weddings and video game-themed weddings might seem vastly different, but both tend to be more expensive than a standard ceremony.

Hire Help. You don't necessarily need to hire a professional service, such as a wedding consultant, but if you can afford it, it’s well worth the cost. If not, ask friends and family for assistance with tasks like arranging seating, decorating with fresh flowers, putting up banners, and taking care of other details right before the ceremony begins. For more complex and time-consuming tasks, you can offer a small fee.

• Trust your helpers. If anything is unclear or if a problem arises, they'll come to you for guidance. Instead of worrying, focus on other things with peace of mind.

Get Everything Sorted Early. Typically, you can’t finalize every detail of the wedding until the big day arrives, but that doesn't mean you can't prepare and arrange things ahead of time. In some cases, you might even be able to prep a day or several days in advance. If you're lucky enough to have the option, don’t hesitate: planning a wedding can be a stressful endeavor.

Relax and Go with the Flow. Once the ceremony begins, you and your future spouse will be the center of attention, not just in front of your guests but also anyone passing by (if it's an outdoor wedding). Now is not the time to nitpick or criticize anyone, nor to get frustrated over small mistakes. Instead, set a good example for those around you. Let go of issues or unforeseen hiccups. Keep a calm demeanor and a smile, no matter what happens during the ceremony or while welcoming guests. Both sets of parents and friends will have a positive impression of you, and people will remember your wedding with fondness.

• Don’t forget to visit the registry office where you registered your marriage to collect your marriage certificate.
• If you change your last name after marriage, remember to update it on important documents like your social security card, driver's license, passport, bank account, credit cards, lease agreements, car ownership papers, voter registration, and any other significant accounts or records.