How to Get Men to Focus on Your Face Instead of Your Chest

Make a subtle sound. When you notice a man fixating on your chest, make a noise to let him know you're aware and disapprove of his actions. Clear your throat loud enough for him to hear, and don’t continue the conversation until he looks up at your face. Once he does, give him a quick scowl to communicate that his behavior isn’t acceptable.

• You might also say something like 'ahem' to get his attention. Ensure that whatever sound you make is noticeable enough for him to react.
• If he continues to stare, repeat this a few times until he gets the hint.
• If he refuses to look at your face, stop talking to him completely.

Ask him to stop. Look at him with a neutral expression and firmly ask him to stop staring at you. Say something like, 'Could you please stop looking at my chest?' Don’t smile, laugh, or try to soften your tone. Speak in a direct, serious manner so he knows you are not joking.

• You have the right to be treated with respect, and there’s no need to be overly polite when someone disrespects you.
• If you try to be too nice, he may downplay the situation and continue the behavior.

Embarrass him. If you're in a group setting, you can call him out in front of others. Make him feel uncomfortable by highlighting his inappropriate behavior. A well-timed humorous remark can draw attention to his actions and make him the target of jokes. This may not only stop him but also send a message to other men that you won’t tolerate such behavior. Try saying things like:

• Don't worry, they're still here. You don't need to keep checking.
• My eyes are up here, buddy.
• Hello? I'm up here!
• Did you get a good look? Awesome! Now let's get back to the conversation.

Make it clear that you’re uncomfortable. The next time you catch a guy staring at your chest, use your body language to express your discomfort. Be obvious enough that he can’t ignore your signals. Some examples of how you might communicate this are:

• Fidget with your shirt, subtly lifting it to reduce the visibility of your cleavage.
• Cross your arms over your chest to block his view.
• Give him a disapproving look while crossing your arms, signaling that his behavior is inappropriate.

Send him an email. If you don't want to confront him directly but his behavior persists, consider sending an email expressing your feelings. Let him know that while you'd rather not discuss it in front of others, you will if the behavior continues. This approach is especially effective if he is a coworker.

• It gives him the chance to correct his behavior without facing immediate retaliation.
• If he responds disrespectfully, you can forward his email to HR or your boss as evidence of the issue.

Talk to his partner. If the man is in a committed relationship, consider informing his partner about his behavior. If this causes tension in his relationship, he’ll likely reconsider staring at women in the future.

• Sometimes, just the threat of telling his partner can be enough to make him stop.
• If you're alone when confronting him, she may not believe you. If he behaves the same way with other women, try to get them to speak to her about his actions as well.

Report to your manager. If the person is your coworker, let your boss know what’s happening. Explain that you can't be productive in an environment where you feel uncomfortable, and that his actions are completely unacceptable.

• If your boss doesn’t act, escalate the situation to their supervisor. Keep going up the chain of command until something is done.
• You can even consider mentioning the possibility of legal action if the issue isn't resolved.

Avoid the individual. If nothing else works, and the person refuses to stop staring at your chest, try distancing yourself as much as possible. If this person is in your social circle, avoid attending events where he’ll be present. If he’s a coworker, consider leaving your job. A place that allows you to be treated like an object rather than a person isn’t worth staying at anyway.

Speak to a principal or counselor. If the person is a student at your school, talk to the appropriate authorities. Go to a principal, trusted teacher, or school counselor and explain what has been happening. They will likely speak with him about his inappropriate behavior and decide on a course of action.

• If you're not comfortable speaking up alone, consider asking a parent for support. Having your mom or dad contact the school on your behalf can feel easier.
• If you know other girls who have had similar issues with this student, encourage them to speak up too.

Maintain strong posture. Stand tall with your shoulders back and take up space confidently. Don't shrink yourself to accommodate others, especially men. If you appear smaller or insecure, people, particularly men, may not respect you and could treat you as weaker.

• Project strength and seriousness by standing with proper posture.
• Practice by standing with your back flat against a wall, ensuring both your shoulders are in contact with it.

Demand eye contact. When speaking with others, make sure you hold their gaze. If they avoid eye contact, let them know you expect them to engage with you. Adjust your position slightly to ensure you're looking into their eyes and hold the gaze a little longer than is comfortable. You may come across as intimidating, but you'll earn their respect.

• By insisting on eye contact, it becomes difficult for them to focus elsewhere, like on your chest.
• People associate steady eye contact with self-assurance and confidence.

Be authentic. Don’t try to make yourself smaller to gain approval from men. Appearing subordinate or overly accommodating doesn’t make you more likable, it makes you seem weak. Whether at work or with friends, show others that you’re their equal and don’t need validation.

• Only smile when it’s genuine. Forced smiles often signal a desire for approval.
• Avoid excessive nodding when speaking. Too much nodding can give the impression that you lack strong opinions.

Be mindful of your body language. When women feel uncomfortable, they often fidget with their hair or body. These actions can be misinterpreted by some men as signs of attraction, which might encourage inappropriate attention. Be conscious of these behaviors if you wish to avoid drawing unwanted looks.

• Touching your hair or chest can trigger sexual attraction signals.
• Some men may misinterpret hair-touching as an invitation to approach or touch them.

• If you’re receiving unwelcome attention from men, speak up immediately. Failing to do so may encourage them to continue treating you disrespectfully.
• Make sure you assert yourself and demand respect so they don’t see you as an object.
• If a man stares at your chest but stops after you ask him to, there’s no need for further retaliation, as he may have acted without malice.

• Sadly, some employers may not take sexual harassment seriously. If you don’t feel supported by your workplace, it may be time to explore other job opportunities.
• You should never feel pressured to alter your appearance or clothing to avoid unwanted attention. How you dress is a personal choice and should be respected.