Buzz
Ghosting refers to the act of suddenly cutting off all communication with someone without any prior notice. Why do you want to ghost someone? If you tend to avoid confrontation or if you’re dating casually without any serious intentions, ignoring them might seem like the easiest option when you no longer wish to interact with them. Ghosting is a simple act, but there are various ways to approach it depending on what you want to achieve. In this article, we’ll show you how to ignore a friend or a romantic interest without feeling guilty.
Steps
Sever all communication.
To ghost someone, you must completely stop all communication with them. That’s the essence of ghosting. If they text, call, or message you, don’t respond. Eventually, they’ll realize you’re no longer interested in talking, and they’ll stop reaching out.
- Ghosting is most effective when you have no specific plans with the person. If you do have plans, you need to let them know that you need to cancel before going silent so they can adjust their schedule accordingly.
- Cutting off communication is a good option if your relationship with the person has been on and off, fluctuating between periods of closeness and distance.
Understand that they may react negatively when ignored.
The person being ignored might feel frustrated when you remain silent. It’s easy to stop replying to their texts or calls, but they may feel hurt or confused, not understanding why you’re no longer in contact. If you choose to ghost someone, be prepared for them to reach out, asking for an explanation, especially if you've known each other for a long time.
- If you're ghosting a partner or a long-time friend, they may try to contact you multiple times. However, if it’s someone you've just met, they may not be as affected by your silence.
- The other person’s reaction to being ghosted depends on the relationship between you two. If you ghost them after just one date, they may not react much, but if you've been dating for months, it’s a completely different story.
Send a final message to end things politely.
Sending a final message is a polite way to ghost someone. Caspering (a term derived from a friendly ghost character in a cartoon) is a version of ghosting where you send them one last message thanking them for their time and formally ending things. It’s a respectful way to close the relationship as it’s not a lengthy conversation but still lets them know your intentions so they can move on.
- "It was nice meeting you, but I don't think we’re a good match. I wish you all the best."
- "I really enjoyed hanging out with you, but I don’t feel a connection. I hope everything works out for you."
Wait a long time before responding to slowly ‘disappear’.
A subtle ghosting act will send a signal that you no longer want to communicate with them. If you prefer not to send a final message, you can keep your distance by responding slowly to their messages. If you previously replied within minutes, now wait hours (or even days) before responding. If they’re perceptive, they’ll understand that you’re not that interested in them.
- This method works best if there are no upcoming plans between you. However, if you’re still considering where and when your next date will be, this is still a viable option.
- The timing for ghosting can vary as every relationship is different, but a delayed response of about 3 days is usually a clear sign that you want to end things.
Make excuses to ignore them for an extended period.
Making excuses to avoid meeting up is also a way to signal your intentions. If you want to decline someone gently, start by coming up with reasons why you can’t meet them. If you keep doing this, eventually they’ll catch on and stop reaching out to you.
- "Sorry, I’m really busy with work right now. I don’t think I can meet you anytime soon."
- "My schedule is completely full. I’m not sure when I’ll be free to meet up."
Unfollow them on social media.
Remove all channels of contact so they can't find you. If you follow them on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook, unfollow them. Once you do this, it will make it clear that you no longer want to talk to them.
- If they continue sending online messages, you can block their account on social media.
You can block their phone number if necessary.
Some people are very persistent and refuse to back down when ignored. If the person you're trying to distance yourself from keeps texting you, blocking their number might be the solution. This way, you won’t have to see their messages anymore and won’t worry about them disturbing you.
Never contact that person again.
Be firm in your decision to avoid confusing the other party. Ghosting is a serious choice and not something you can undo quickly. Reaching out to someone you’ve ignored is called “zombie texting” and may confuse (or irritate) the person you were trying to distance from.
- If you feel guilty after ghosting someone, you can message them an apology if you wish. However, there’s no guarantee they’ll forgive you, and you might never hear from them again.
