How to Handle Embarrassment

Everyone faces embarrassment at some point because we all make mistakes. Embarrassment can stem from unwanted attention, a mistake, or being placed in an uncomfortable situation. You might want to avoid the situation until the embarrassment fades away, but there are better ways to handle it. You can try to understand your feelings of embarrassment, learn to laugh at yourself, and practice self-love when you feel awkward.

Assess the situation. How you handle an embarrassing moment depends on what happened. For example, if you said something inappropriate to a friend, you may feel embarrassed because you shouldn’t have said what you did. However, if you feel awkward because you accidentally did something, like walking too fast and tripping in front of a group, that’s a different kind of situation. Each situation requires a different approach to deal with the feeling of embarrassment.

Forgive yourself and stop putting pressure on yourself. After apologizing (if necessary), you need to forgive yourself for what you've done or said. Self-forgiveness is an essential step in dealing with embarrassment because it helps you stop putting pressure on yourself. By forgiving yourself, you send the message that you've sincerely admitted your mistake and don't need to hold on to it.

Distract yourself and others. When you don’t want to ignore the awkward situation you've caused, after assessing and confronting it, you should think ahead. You can help both yourself and others move on from the embarrassing moment by changing the topic or encouraging them to do something else.

Apologize if necessary. If you've made a mistake, you will need to apologize for your actions. Apologizing may make you feel even more embarrassed, but you must face the initial awkwardness and move forward. Be sure to apologize sincerely and directly.

Reflect on your most embarrassing moments. Although it may be painful to recall your most awkward moments, it can be helpful to understand what caused your embarrassment. Create a list of five embarrassing incidents and compare them to the most recent one.

Laugh at yourself. After creating a list of your most embarrassing moments, allow yourself to laugh at them. Laughing at what you've done can be a liberating experience. By viewing them as silly things from the past, you can help yourself let go of the lingering embarrassment.

Love yourself. If you can't laugh at yourself for what you've done, try to love yourself. Acknowledge the embarrassment and speak to yourself like you would to a close friend. Allow yourself to feel the discomfort and understand the hurt caused by the situation.

Focus on the present. Once you've calmed yourself with laughter or self-love, redirect your attention to the present moment. Realize that the embarrassing moment is in the past. Try to focus on what's happening in your life right now. Where are you? What are you doing? Who are you with? How do you feel? Shifting your focus to the present can help you stop clinging to what happened before.

Continue striving to be your best self. While embarrassment can be painful, it can also be valuable for personal growth. If you've made a mistake that caused you to feel embarrassed, think about what you can do to avoid making the same mistake in the future. If you made a harmless mistake with someone, recognize that you didn’t do anything wrong and move forward.

Consider seeing a specialist. If you're still unable to let go of the embarrassment despite your best efforts, consider seeking help from a doctor. You may be facing an underlying issue that requires ongoing effort, or the embarrassment could be tied to other mental health factors such as rumination or low self-esteem.

Realize that embarrassment is normal. Feeling embarrassed might make you think there's something wrong with you or that you're isolated, but it's important to remember that these feelings aren't accurate. Embarrassment is a common emotion, just like happiness, sadness, or anger. When you're feeling embarrassed, remember that everyone experiences it at some point.

Understand that it's normal for others to notice your embarrassment. One of the worst parts of feeling embarrassed is when others notice your discomfort. Knowing that others see your awkwardness can make you feel even more embarrassed. This happens because embarrassment can make you feel exposed or vulnerable to judgment. Unlike shame, which can be both public and personal, embarrassment is typically a public issue. Remind yourself that there's nothing wrong with others knowing you're embarrassed, as it's a normal human emotion.

Understand that embarrassment can be helpful. While embarrassment is never a pleasant experience, it can sometimes be beneficial. Research shows that people who blush after making a mistake are often seen as more trustworthy. This is because they're showing an awareness of social norms. If you blush over a small mistake, don’t dwell on it, because it actually makes people view you in a more positive light.

Consider the link between embarrassment and perfectionism. Perfectionism can contribute to feelings of embarrassment. You might set unrealistically high standards for yourself, which can lead you to feel like you're failing if you don't live up to them. This sense of failure can lead to embarrassment, so it's important to set achievable standards for yourself. Remind yourself that you're your own harshest critic. While it may seem like the world is watching and judging you, that's not the reality. Think about how much attention you pay to the small details of what others say and do. You don't scrutinize others the way you scrutinize yourself.

Consider the relationship between embarrassment and self-confidence. Confident people tend to experience less embarrassment compared to those who lack confidence. If you have low self-confidence, you may find yourself feeling more embarrassed or the embarrassment may feel more intense than usual. Try building your confidence to reduce the level of embarrassment you experience daily.

• If you are highly self-conscious, you may even find yourself facing shame, which differs from embarrassment. Shame results from a poor self-image, often caused by frequent feelings of embarrassment. Consider speaking to a specialist if you feel that your embarrassment has led to feelings of shame.