How to Identify If Someone is Lying

It can be difficult to tell when someone is lying, especially if they are a skilled liar. However, there are certain signs that indicate dishonesty. Observing their body language, words, and reactions in specific situations can help you judge whether they are lying or not.

Notice if they are fiddling with something or adjusting objects. Many people unconsciously touch their hair, straighten a pencil on the desk, or push a chair under the table when lying. These actions can be signs of dishonesty.

Listen for signs of throat clearing or swallowing. Someone who is lying may clear their throat more frequently or swallow before responding.

Notice if they keep touching their face. Many liars don’t show visible anxiety, but they often touch their face. The pressure of fabricating a story can cause some nervousness, which may lead blood to recede from the extremities, including the ears. This sensation can sometimes cause tingling or discomfort, prompting the person to touch their ear.

Watch for tightly pressed lips. Liars often press their lips together more tightly and more often when they are not being truthful. This can show that they are concentrating on creating a story.

Look for fewer blinks. Lying requires more cognitive energy, as the person has to concentrate harder while fabricating a story. People tend to blink less when using cognitive energy, so pay attention to any signs of reduced blinking if you suspect someone is lying.

• Similarly, look for signs of reduced movement. People tend to move less when cognitive energy is high, such as when lying.

Monitor their body movements. Many liars remain very still. This is sometimes seen as a body’s response to a dangerous situation. Similar to the ‘fight or flight’ response, the body may freeze and prepare to fight.

Observe how they use their words. Language in fabricated stories tends to lack a personal touch. A liar might avoid using first-person terms like 'I' or 'my'. Instead of using proper names, they often switch to pronouns like 'he' or 'she'.

Watch for the behavior of 'changing the subject'. When you question a liar, they may divert your question to another topic. They might switch subjects or even respond with another question.

Notice repetitive words or phrases. A liar might repeat certain words or phrases. This could indicate they're trying to convince themselves of the story they're telling. It's also possible that some repeated words are part of rehearsed lies.

• A liar might also repeat your question, perhaps to buy time while they figure out how to respond appropriately.

Listen for interrupted sentences. Often, a liar will start answering and then pause, only to restart or fail to complete their sentence. This could signal they’ve noticed inconsistencies in their story and are trying to cover up the gaps.

Recognizing when someone corrects their own words. Liars often unconsciously fix or alter their statements when trying to embellish or refine the story they are telling. If you notice that the person frequently corrects their speech, it might be a sign that their story is fabricated.

Look for missing details in their story. Liars tend to skip over small details that a truthful person would typically mention. These finer points are harder to recall, so the liar may choose to leave them out.

• A truthful person may describe background music in a scene, while a liar might neglect this detail. The story might remain vague to make it easier to remember what to say.
• A liar may also describe details inconsistently, so pay attention to the consistency of their narrative.

Watch if their facial expressions genuinely reflect their emotions. When someone is pretending to feel an emotion, their facial expressions can give them away. For example, if they smile, pay attention to whether their eyes smile too. Similarly, if they're crying, check if the lower half of their face shows the same emotion.

Ask a question they haven’t prepared for. Liars often structure their stories around anticipated questions. If you catch them off guard with an unexpected query, they might struggle to provide a satisfactory answer.

• For instance, if they mention eating at a restaurant, they might expect questions about the food, the waitstaff, or how much the meal cost. However, they might be unprepared for a question like where the restroom is located.

Observe fleeting expressions on their face. Fleeting expressions are very subtle movements on someone's face that reveal their true emotions. These emotions pass by quickly, often lasting only 1/125 of a second.

• Fleeting expressions can reveal feelings, but they may not always give you clues about the cause of those feelings. For example, if a liar shows a fleeting expression of fear, it might be because they’re afraid of being caught. But a truthful person could also show anxiety from fearing they won’t be believed.

Watch for inconsistencies between their words and gestures. Sometimes, a person might say one thing, but their body language contradicts them. For example, they might say 'yes', but their head might shake as if saying 'no'.

• Remember that nonverbal cues can vary greatly from person to person. What you observe in one individual may not apply to another.

Eliminate false assumptions about body language and unusual speech patterns. Mood, cultural differences, and certain disorders can cause a person to behave differently from what you expect, even if they’re telling the truth. Avoid jumping to conclusions and thinking someone is lying just because they act differently.

• Stress may make someone seem like they're lying when they're actually just in a tough situation for another reason.
• People from Eastern cultures may avoid eye contact as a sign of politeness.
• People with Tourette’s Syndrome might have involuntary movements.
• Those with ADHD may seem restless, avoid eye contact, talk quickly, tell long-winded stories, repeat themselves, and appear overly emotional.
• People with autism often have atypical body language, such as repetitive motions, fidgeting, and avoiding eye contact in typical situations. They might repeat their words and struggle with communication. They can be very emotional or show little emotion.

Remember that accusing someone of lying is a serious matter. False accusations can damage your relationship and your reputation. Avoid making accusations unless you have evidence that the person is not being truthful.

Try to gently prompt them to tell the truth. Keep in mind that sometimes people are not fully truthful for reasons that deserve understanding; they may not have ill intentions. Occasionally, a soft prompt can encourage them to open up and share the truth. You can reassure them that they’re safe to be honest and that it’s okay to reveal what’s really going on.

• "I feel like you haven't told me everything. I'm here to listen, even if it's bad news."
• "I think there's something you're still holding back from telling me."
• "Even if you messed up the task I gave you, I won’t get angry. I just want you to let me know if something went wrong."
• "Sweetheart, honesty is important in this house. I prefer a daughter who admits to sneaking a snack over one who lies about it."

• It’s very difficult to determine if someone is lying through text messages or letters. A study has shown that people tend to take longer to respond to messages when they’re lying, partly because they need extra time to craft a message that seems perfect.