How to invite someone out

Inviting someone out is an important step in the early stages of a new relationship. You might want to ask a classmate, coworker, or someone you met at a party. Even though you might feel nervous at first, don’t stress too much when inviting someone. Let them know you’d like to hang out with them sometime, or invite them to a specific event. Be confident in asking someone to join you for an impromptu outing.

Invite casually. If you’ve already planned to ask someone out, don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Stay calm when you ask someone to hang out, and be confident. Take a deep breath and speak casually.

• Don’t overdo it by saying, “You’re so interesting, and I really want to spend more time with you.”
• When inviting a classmate, act naturally and say something like, “Hey, every time we talk, we end up discussing boring topics. How about we go out sometime?”
• If you had fun with someone at a party, you could say, “This has been a fun time. Would you like to meet up again sometime?”

Invite someone to hang out based on a shared hobby. It can be tricky to ask someone to hang out without any reason. If you're inviting someone with a common interest, you can use that to your advantage. You could mention that sometimes spending time together doing something fun is a great idea.

• If you're always chatting with a colleague about the TV show "The Walking Dead," invite them over to watch the show together. You know both of you are free during its airing time, and this gives you a fixed schedule, so they'll leave once the show is over.
• Perhaps you've met someone at the gym. Since you both usually work out at the same time, invite them to train together. You could say, "We could be workout buddies and motivate each other to push harder!"
• You could also say, "I noticed we always paint at the same time in the same place, how about we set up a painting date sometime?"

Be confident that the other person will agree. It won't be effective to ask someone to hang out if you're already thinking they will decline. You should believe in yourself as an interesting person who others would enjoy spending time with and that they'll say yes. When you approach them confidently and directly, they'll be more open to the idea than if you're hesitant.

• Don't say, "Maybe you're always busy with friends, but we could hang out sometimes if you want. It's fine if you're too busy."
• For instance, think about a colleague you'd like to invite. You can casually approach them in the break room and say, "Let's go out somewhere after work sometime." Keep it simple, show your excitement, and let it flow naturally.
• If you're regularly meeting someone at a weekly club, say, "You know, we meet here every week. How about we grab lunch after the next meetup?" Be direct and confident that they'll agree.

Let the other person know when you're free. When inviting someone to hang out, it's important to know your own availability. Think of three days in the next two weeks when you have free time and suggest those days to them, asking if they’re available on any of them.

• If you leave the day of the hangout uncertain, it’s less likely to happen. But if you offer them three specific days, the chances are higher that they'll agree to one of them.
• Perhaps you always reserve an evening for a certain activity. For example, let them know you're free on Tuesday evenings and ask if they're available next Tuesday.
• You can say, "I want to hang out on one of the Saturdays in the next two weeks. Would you like to go shopping and have lunch with me?"

Invite them to an upcoming event. If you have plans for a party or a group gathering, even if you're not hosting, invite them to attend. Since the event takes place at a specific time, if they can’t make it, they're simply declining the event, not rejecting you. This makes it less stressful than asking them out on a one-on-one outing.

• If you plan to host a football-watching party, invite them to join. It’s a popular event with a fixed time, so there will likely be more people attending.
• Maybe you don’t have any specific plans soon. Discuss with your friends to invite someone you want to get to know.
• It doesn’t have to be a private event. You could ask if they’d like to go to a local festival and take a walk. Alternatively, they might be interested in a relaxing public event.

Plan for the weekend ahead. During the weekdays, people usually have set schedules, and they often find themselves free on the weekends. If you typically meet others in a work or study environment during the week, invite them to hang out on the weekend. This way, you'll have time in the morning, afternoon, and evening to organize a fun outing.

• The weekend is ideal because people tend to stay up late on Friday and Saturday nights, giving them more free time on Saturday and Sunday.
• Weekends often feature more events like local theaters, farmers' markets, festivals, concerts, and parties.
• You can say something like, "After a hectic week, I need to unwind this weekend. Would you like to go to the shooting range on Friday after work?"

Invite them to lunch. If you're at work or leaving class around lunchtime, you can ask someone to join you for a meal. If both of you brought lunch, sit together and eat near each other. If not, simply ask if they would like to go out for lunch with you. This method works well because both of you need to eat, so there is less pressure when suggesting the invitation.

• The meal doesn’t need to be immediate. You can ask someone to have dinner after work or meet up a little later when you're free.
• If you're leaving a party in the evening, ask if they’d like to grab a late-night bite at a nearby café.

Suggest hanging out after class or a meeting. If you meet someone at the office, a club gathering, or a class, ask if they'd like to do something after the work is done. You could ask them during the meeting if they'd be interested in hanging out afterward, or ask as soon as the meeting is over to see if they want to do something together.

• They might be busy with other things, but usually, people will be free after scheduled events. Take advantage of that window in their schedule.
• You could say, "I have a couple of free hours after class, would you like to go for a walk with me?" This is a simple and low-pressure way to invite someone to hang out depending on the situation.
• After leaving class or a meeting, you could say, "I’m planning to head to Highlands Coffee for a drink. Want to join me?" Going out for food and drinks after work is common, so people tend to see this kind of invitation as normal.

Invite someone to go anywhere you're headed. Anytime you’re about to do something and see someone you'd like to hang out with, invite them along. Since you're going to do it anyway, their refusal isn’t a big deal. If it’s someone you meet daily, there will be plenty of opportunities to ask them to hang out.

• This approach works well when you're leaving your dorm to watch a movie, heading out from your apartment for a hike, or leaving the office to play an outdoor sport like frisbee.
• Get into the habit of inviting people to join you wherever you're going. Over time, you’ll get used to asking others to hang out, and as a result, they’re more likely to agree and join you.