Seeing another girl flirt with your boyfriend can be emotionally difficult and uncomfortable. She might laugh too loudly at his jokes, touch him in a way that's overly familiar, or flirt with him openly in public. It’s hard to figure out how to react in this situation, as you don’t want to wrongly accuse anyone of infidelity, but at the same time, you're hurt by their actions. This guide will help you determine if she's really trying to steal your boyfriend. You can also take steps to ensure you feel secure and cherished in your relationship. Keep reading to learn the signs starting from step one below.
Steps
Evaluating Her Actions

- She touches him often, such as placing her hand on his arm.
- She makes frequent eye contact with him.
- She laughs at all his jokes.
- She positions herself so that she faces him.
- She starts conversations with him.

- She invites him to do things just the two of them, like going to the movies or having lunch at a café.
- She asks for favors that involve him going somewhere with her alone, like changing a lightbulb.
- She asks him to take walks with her.
- If he mentions doing something, like getting a glass of water in another room, she invites herself to join him.

- If you notice your boyfriend texting someone regularly, ask him who it is. If he acts evasive or defensive, it could be her.
- Checking your boyfriend’s texts might feel like an invasion of privacy. If he seems to be hiding something, talk to him about trust issues.
Managing Jealousy



Sharing Your Emotions with Your Boyfriend

- The girl touches your boyfriend in ways you find inappropriate.
- On weekends, he spends more time with her than with you.
- He texts or calls her while you’re having quality time together.
- They flirt openly in front of you.

Here are some conversation starters to consider:

- “I’ve noticed that you’ve been spending more time with her lately, and it’s making me feel a bit insecure.”
- “I’m glad you’re happy with your friendship with her, but sometimes the way she interacts with you makes me uncomfortable.”
- “I’m happy with us, but I think there are ways we can make me feel more valued and respected in our relationship.”

- Clearly define your expectations with your boyfriend. For example, "I don’t expect you to cut ties with your friends, but I would appreciate it if you focused on me when we’re together, not texting her."
- Avoid vague or manipulative boundaries. Instead of saying, “I want more time with you,” try saying, “Can we have a date night, just the two of us?”
- Make sure he knows what’s acceptable and what’s not. If you’re uncomfortable with him giving another girl a back massage, tell him that it doesn’t sit well with you.
- Listen to his perspective and be open to his boundaries as well.

- “I feel uncomfortable when you go to the movies alone with her on Friday nights. I would prefer to join you, or for you to go with other people as well.”
- “I feel hurt when we’re spending time together, but you’re texting her and laughing at your private jokes.”

- “I really enjoy our quality time together.”
- “I appreciate how you listen to me when I’m dealing with something.”
- “You make me feel supported and happy.”
Building a Stronger Relationship

- Join a Zumba class.
- Cook an elaborate meal as a team.
- Spend a weekend in a new destination.
- Drive to a beautiful hiking spot a few hours away.
- Learn how to surf.
- Volunteer at an animal shelter.
- Take a photography class together.


- "How can I assist you today?"
- "What do you love most about our relationship?"
- "What small things can I do to show you I care?"
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Avoid focusing too much on the girl you think might be trying to steal your boyfriend. The issue here is the strength of your relationship, not just her behavior.
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Be respectful and considerate to both your boyfriend and the girl who may be trying to win his attention. Even though their actions might frustrate you, it’s important not to react impulsively.
- Even if you're feeling uncertain, stay true to the amazing person he fell for. Don't let fear or anxiety make you act differently. If you sense any flirting from her, let him know how you feel and discuss it together. If he’s the one flirting with her, you might need to reconsider your relationship or talk to him about your worries.
- Find out if she and your boyfriend have been out before. If they have and she still has feelings for him, she might try to win him back when she sees you're together.
- Listen when she's with her friends and see if she brings him up. Also, pay attention when she talks to your boyfriend and see if they share common interests.
- Own your feelings. It’s perfectly okay to feel jealous! Be honest about your emotions and discuss your concerns with him openly.
Important Notes
- If your boyfriend admits to being unfaithful, it might be time to reassess whether continuing the relationship is the right decision for you.
- If your boyfriend is dismissive or disrespectful when you voice your concerns, it may be necessary to reconsider the health and happiness of your relationship.