How to Live with Disabilities

Living with a disability, whether recent or long-term, can be an incredibly challenging experience. Society is structured to serve those without disabilities, even though 20% of the global population faces some form of disability. No matter where you are or what lifestyle you lead, you can still make changes to live with a disability more easily and find greater happiness. By adjusting both mentally and physically, you'll realize that your disability doesn't define you or limit your ability to live comfortably and joyfully.

Learn about your disability. Knowledge is power, so understanding your disability can empower you to live with it. Especially if this is a new disability for you, you should discuss with your doctor what to expect. Some questions to ask include:

• Is this disability temporary or permanent?
• Are there any complications or secondary conditions associated with this disability?
• Are there physical and mental resources or support groups available in your area?
• Is there any treatment or physical therapy required to manage your disability?
• Do you need to modify your lifestyle, work, or activities to accommodate this new or progressing disability?
• If your disability is progressing, how fast is it advancing? Is there any way to slow down the process?

Accept your circumstances. Perhaps the hardest emotional challenge when adapting to a disability is accepting your prognosis. While hoping and striving for recovery is always positive, doing so while looking down on your current condition may lead to depression and failure. You need to accept your present situation and the future that may come with it. By doing this, you will be able to focus on improving your quality of life rather than becoming frustrated with what’s happening.

• Don't confuse acceptance with laziness. Acceptance means you fully understand your situation; however, it doesn't mean you stop striving to improve it.
• Denial or ignoring the seriousness of your disability may make your daily physical and mental tasks even more difficult.

Focus on the present and future instead of the past. If your disability has been caused by an accident or the progression of an illness, it may be hard not to compare your current condition to what it was before. However, letting go of the past goes hand in hand with accepting your circumstances. You don’t have to forget everything you had before, but you shouldn’t view the past with despair about your present condition. Cherish the memories of your past (before your disability), but don’t let them hold you back. Always move forward and focus on improving your current situation.

• You can still take time to reflect, but don’t let it make you feel miserable.
• If you find yourself constantly thinking about life before, try engaging in activities that push you to plan for the future.

Allow yourself to grieve. For those who have just acquired a disability or are experiencing a progressing one, it is natural to mourn the loss of your 'former self.' It’s completely fine to take time to acknowledge your emotions about the changes in your life. By recognizing that feelings of sadness or anger when circumstances change are natural, and allowing yourself to experience them, you'll be better equipped to move on.

Strive to maintain optimism. Those with an optimistic outlook in difficult circumstances tend to be happier and healthier than those who are pessimistic about their lives. You can make a huge difference in your physical and mental well-being by staying positive, even when faced with challenging conditions. Although the saying may seem overused, always remember to look at the bright side of things. You can't rely on external influences and experiences to bring happiness; you must take responsibility for your own happiness or you may never find it.

• Try to find the good in every situation, no matter how small.
• Try to stop every time you feel negative thoughts. Recognize that you are being negative and challenge each negative thought with a positive one.

Don't isolate yourself. You might feel inclined to avoid people and social situations when feeling down, but doing so will only make you feel worse. Don’t use your disability as an excuse to distance yourself from friends, family, or activities you enjoy. Instead, do the opposite. Take every opportunity to go out and experience new and interesting things. Hang out with friends, attend social events, visit family, try new hobbies. You’ll feel much happier when participating in activities you love with the people you care about.

• Spending time alone is different from isolating yourself. You should always try to make time for yourself, but don’t spend all your time alone.
• Consider meeting a friend or family member weekly. This way, you’ll always have a reason to go out and meet people you enjoy.

Focus on your strengths. Adapting to a disability might make it hard to recognize your own strengths and capabilities. Instead of only focusing on what you can no longer do, take a look at the things you’re still able to excel at. Nurture and develop these strengths whenever you can, and who knows, you might discover new abilities emerging from your experience with your disability.

• When talking about your disability, don’t focus on listing the things you can no longer do. The first thing you should highlight is your abilities.
• Consider taking courses that may help you develop your talents and abilities.

Don’t feel embarrassed asking for help. One of the biggest barriers to overcome when you first experience a disability is becoming comfortable with asking others for help when needed. While it may be uncomfortable or awkward, asking for support is often necessary. You should know what you can do on your own, but don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Forcing yourself to complete something beyond your capacity can be harmful and lead to physical injury. Understand that there is no shame in asking for help, and accepting assistance doesn’t mean you’re unsuccessful or incapable.

• Ensure there’s someone (or a nurse) nearby to assist you when needed.

See a therapist. Although speaking to a stranger about your issues may initially feel daunting, there’s no one better equipped to help you navigate your transition than a therapist. They are trained to assist people in coping with the emotional and mental challenges that can come with living with a disability. A therapist can provide you with the resources and support necessary for accepting your disability. You should schedule an appointment with a disability-focused counselor in your area.

• If you’re struggling with a mental health issue related to your disability, a therapist can help by offering treatment options or medication.
• Regular therapy sessions are also a great way to help you manage challenges unrelated to your disability that you may be dealing with. A new or progressing disability can trigger old emotional reactions.

Join group therapy. Group therapy for people with disabilities is not only a wonderful way to tackle your emotional struggles but also a chance to meet others dealing with similar challenges. People who regularly attend group therapy are generally happier and adapt to their disabilities better emotionally. You can find group therapy in your area or look for classes focused on the disability you are facing.

• If you’re seeing a therapist, they may be able to refer you to a suitable group therapy session.

Explore government assistance programs. Living with a disability is undeniably challenging, but you don’t have to face it alone without support. If your disability significantly impacts your daily life, there are government programs or large charitable organizations that can help. You can reach out to local social workers to find the right programs for you and learn about the benefits they offer.

• Remember, many programs require additional doctor visits to assess your disability, so don’t get frustrated if a new doctor comes to reassess your condition.
• Look for charity organizations in your area that may specialize in your specific type of disability.

Consider getting a service dog. Service dogs provide amazing benefits for two main reasons: they help you with tasks that might be challenging due to your disability, and they also act as animal therapy, reducing the risk of depression and loneliness. If your disability makes it hard to complete daily tasks, you should consider getting a trained service dog. A service dog will assist you whenever you need, freeing you from relying on others in your life.

• Government programs or charitable organizations may provide service dogs for you.
• Some programs have long waiting lists for service dogs, so remember that you may not get immediate assistance.

Look for organizations that can offer support. There are organizations that can help you manage your disability, understand your rights at work, and in public spaces. Some places to start include:

• American Association of People with Disabilities
• Center for Applied Special Technology
• Mental Health America
• Mobility International USA
• National Organization on Disability

Maintain hobbies and interests when possible. Stopping activities you once enjoyed can lead to increased feelings of sadness. Make an effort to keep up with your favorite hobbies and interests. If activities you once loved are no longer easy for you, try finding new ways to engage in them. For example, if you used to enjoy reading but can’t anymore, consider listening to audiobooks; if you’re now in a wheelchair but still love sports, search for wheelchair sports teams in your area.

• You might also want to consider starting a new hobby.
• Joining a class to learn a new hobby is a great way to socialize and do something you’re passionate about.

Maintain overall health. A balanced diet and regular exercise are essential for everyone, but they become especially important when adapting to life with a disability. Ensure you have regular meals, incorporating plenty of fruits and vegetables. Try to engage in physical activity daily, based on your skill levels and abilities. Proper nutrition and exercise also help reduce the risk of depression and loneliness, as both nutrition and physical activity boost dopamine and serotonin (happiness hormones) in the brain.

• If needed, you might consider adding physical therapy into your daily routine.
• Always consult your doctor before making any significant changes to your diet.
• Regular exercise helps you build and maintain muscle, which can aid in overcoming physical limitations.

Look for jobs that align with your abilities. You may find that due to your disability, you can no longer maintain your previous job or perform tasks as you once did. To sustain your financial situation and keep yourself engaged, you can look for new jobs that suit your abilities, regardless of physical limitations. Make a list of what you excel at and the potential careers related to those skills. Seek out such opportunities in your area and see where they lead. If you're in the U.S., remember that asking about your disability is illegal for employers. As long as you can perform the job within your capabilities, your disability will not hinder your chances of being hired.

• According to the Americans with Disabilities Act, employers must accommodate you if they are able to.
• Consider volunteer work if money isn't a concern for you. This can be helpful as it provides you with a meaningful job to do and helps you focus less on yourself. Many people who volunteer feel happier as a result.

• Always consult with your doctor or therapist before making major life changes.