Buzz
Awkwardness isn’t usually something people seek out in their interactions. Yet, it’s not always a negative experience. The unease can actually be enjoyable, especially when you're the one causing it. While making a friend feel awkward might not win you any social points, it can definitely bring out your mischievous side. Awkwardness tends to spread quickly, so you can also make others feel uneasy just by being awkward yourself.
Steps
Showing Awkwardness
Gaze intently at the other person. One of the easiest and most effective ways to make someone feel awkward is by staring. Staring involves a deep, sustained look that creates discomfort. Lock eyes with someone and hold that gaze. The longer you maintain eye contact, the more uncomfortable the other person will feel.
- Staring can communicate various emotions. For instance, if you're smiling, it could seem like you're flirting. But to make someone feel awkward, you should keep your expression neutral. A blank face paired with an unwavering stare will leave the other person confused, heightening their discomfort.
- Be aware that prolonged staring may make you uncomfortable too. It’s not a natural behavior when interacting with unfamiliar people.
Act uneasy. Nervousness is all about showing signs of anxiety and distress. You can achieve this by constantly shifting your gaze and fidgeting. If others sense your discomfort, it will likely make them uneasy too. If you're usually calm and collected, you'll need to put in the effort to act jittery. Try to avoid sitting still as much as you can. Your body language can be a powerful tool in creating awkwardness.
Gross people out with bodily noises. Farting and burping are your go-to tools when trying to create uncomfortable situations. These are particularly effective in quieter settings, where the sound will be hard to ignore.
- This tactic works best if the person you’re targeting values politeness. If they try hard not to embarrass you, the more noticeable your bodily function, the more awkward they'll feel.
Invade their personal space. Even the most laid-back individuals have their own boundaries. Unless you’re in a romantic relationship with someone, there’s an unspoken rule to respect their personal bubble. While the bubble may vary, getting too close to someone’s face can make anyone feel uneasy.
- Note that this doesn’t always lead to a fun kind of awkwardness. If someone tends to get angry, they may not react well to this invasion of space.
Leave a high-five hanging. People tend to rely on certain expectations, making their lives easier. Offering a high-five, for instance, comes with the unspoken understanding that it will be completed. If you pull your hand away as the other person moves to meet it, you create a subtle but noticeable discomfort. Unfinished actions can be psychologically unsettling.
Spend a lot of time alone. The best way to naturally create awkwardness is by being authentically awkward. People who spend considerable time alone tend to develop quirky habits that others may find odd or uncomfortable. This strategy isn’t ideal if you’re only planning to make someone feel awkward once, and it’s not recommended if you dislike being alone. However, the more time you spend by yourself, the more naturally awkward you may become.
Verbally Making Someone Feel Awkward
Deliberately misinterpret social cues. Most people pick up on social cues instinctively, often without even thinking. To make someone feel awkward, intentionally misread these cues. For every response you think you should give, do the opposite. This trick can cause any social interaction to quickly spiral into discomfort.
- For instance, if someone cracks a joke, react with anger or sadness instead of laughing. Even if the joke is funny, holding back the expected reaction will surely unsettle the other person.
Ask questions that stir controversy. People typically avoid asking uncomfortable questions when they understand social norms and boundaries. However, if you’re aware of these and want to make someone squirm, bring up sensitive topics. Politics and religion are two prime examples that can get people worked up when introduced suddenly.
- You could also ask overly personal questions about someone’s life, though this approach can be risky. Some individuals might genuinely be hurt if you touch on sensitive or traumatic memories.
Fill your speech with "filler" words. Filler words are commonly used without thought to fill in pauses in conversation, such as “like,” “um,” or “ahh.” These words give the brain time to catch up with your thoughts. If you're trying to make someone feel uncomfortable, using these words makes you sound uneasy and nervous. Drop an “um” between or at the beginning of nearly every sentence.
- If this is already a habit, pay attention to your natural use of fillers and emphasize them when possible.
- If you naturally suffer from this issue, try speaking more slowly to break the habit.
Mispronounce and forget names. Forgetting someone’s name is generally considered rude. While you’d typically make an effort to remember people’s names, purposely mispronouncing someone’s name will introduce an uncomfortable dynamic between you both.
- This works best with people you don’t know well. If you’ve known the person for a while, they’re more likely to think you’re just being silly.
Make a big deal out of your mistakes. People who are anxious or nervous tend to overemphasize any social missteps they make. You can take advantage of this by exaggerating your own errors to make someone else uncomfortable.
- For instance, if you accidentally bump into someone, apologize profusely, then keep bringing it up later, even after they’ve probably forgotten about it. This keeps the mistake alive and makes it feel much bigger than it really is.
Highlight the awkwardness. Sometimes, the very act of pointing out the awkwardness makes it even worse. If there’s an uncomfortable silence or a stiff conversation, calling attention to it can increase the tension. Saying something like, "This is super awkward right now," and letting the silence drag out will put the pressure on the other person to keep things moving, and they’ll probably feel pretty uncomfortable.
- However, if you bring up the awkwardness in a more honest way, it can actually relieve the tension for both people. But if you stay focused on making it more awkward, you’ll push it further.
Creating Discomforting Situations
Assess the social norms around you. What might be awkward in one environment could be totally acceptable in another. To stir the pot, take a moment to assess the surroundings. What’s considered polite, and what would be considered rude or awkward? For example, in a library, silence is golden. Coughing loudly could be a subtle way to make things feel uncomfortable.
Introduce sexual tension to the situation. If there’s a potential for sexual tension between you and the person you're trying to make uncomfortable, this is a surefire way to escalate the awkwardness. This works especially well if neither of you have ever thought of each other in that way. Making flirtatious comments or giving romantic compliments (e.g., “You’re so pretty”) will quickly make things uncomfortable.
- If you go this route, make sure to respect boundaries. Awkwardness can be playful, but you don’t want to earn a reputation as creepy. Avoid explicit comments or any physical advances. If someone tells you to stop, do not push the boundaries any further.
Interrupt a conversation. Interrupting others is a classic habit of rude or socially awkward people. You can barge into an ongoing conversation and start discussing something entirely unrelated, preferably at a loud volume. The larger the group, the more uncomfortable the situation will become. For example, if a group is talking about weekend plans, suddenly rushing in and loudly declaring your love for neoclassical minimalism will make things awkward for everyone involved.
Sing along loudly to music. Awkwardness arises from not considering the comfort of others around you. If you walk into a room singing to music with headphones in, you’ll disrupt the atmosphere. If you're with someone in a public space and do this, the other person will feel even more uncomfortable because they'll be associated with your behavior.
- The more obnoxious the music, the better. A loud track from Madonna will work much better than a calm Brian Eno piece.
Drop something on the floor. Physical mishaps, like tripping or dropping something, can completely derail the flow of a social setting. While people can usually brush off these incidents, if you're trying to be awkward, you can make the situation worse by drawing it out. If you drop an item, like a drink, take your time cleaning it up, making a big deal of the mistake. Apologize profusely.
- Bonus points if the item breaks when it hits the floor.
Embarrass someone in public. Awkwardness and embarrassment often go hand in hand. If you're in a public setting, you can use the attention of the surrounding people to your advantage. For example, if you're sitting together at a restaurant, create a scene. As others look over, the person you’re targeting will feel guilty by association and won’t appreciate the attention.
- Watch for signs of embarrassment, like them avoiding eye contact or blushing.
-
Awkwardness isn’t necessarily a bad thing. While it can be taken negatively, it can also be a surprisingly pleasant experience when done with good intentions.
-
Awkwardness is contagious. If you're feeling awkward, it’s likely the other person is too. With that in mind, self-deprecating humor or behavior will often help you make the other person feel uneasy as well.
The tips in this section come from the real-life experiences of Mytour readers just like you. If you have a helpful suggestion that could benefit others on Mytour, feel free to share it in the form below.
- Give them a stern, angry look, and then strut away as if acting that way is perfectly normal for you.
- Adopt different personas or characters to throw people off and make them feel uncomfortable.
Important Considerations
- Trying to make someone feel awkward can easily be taken the wrong way and come across as just plain mean. Always ensure that your actions are harmless. At the end of the day, you don’t want to cause long-lasting tension between you and the other person.
