Buzz
If someone insults, harms, or causes pain to others, including you, don’t let anger take control. Instead, seek revenge. Revenge can be one of the most satisfying ways to protect yourself and heal the wounds you've suffered. However, the key to a good revenge plan is ensuring the punishment matches the offense. Use your sharp mind to execute the plan without putting yourself in danger or escalating the situation to the point where you can’t undo the damage. And if the concept of 'an eye for an eye' doesn’t sit well with you, remember this proverb: 'Living happily is the best revenge.'
Steps
Perfect Your Revenge Plan
Sign them up for spam emails. If you know their home address or email, use it to sign them up for every advertising service you can think of. Before long, their inbox will be flooded with annoying spam every time they check it. This is a harmless way to get your revenge.
- To make it even more infuriating, sign them up for embarrassing products and services, like male enhancement pills, skin-whitening treatments, or adult toys.
- If you want to add extra sting, use a fake address to send them packages containing dog poop, dead fish, or moldy cheese.
Send a Voodoo Doll to Your Enemy. If you want to take it further, contact a prank service to have a voodoo doll made for your foe. You can send them a photo or description of the person you wish to curse, and the item will be shipped within 3-10 business days. The recipient will surely be both surprised and concerned when they open the mysterious package.
- To make the revenge even spicier, you can include a note pinned with needles: 'Don't make me use this.'
Give Your Enemy a Scary Bathroom Surprise. This is a classic prank—order a few packets of poppers and attach 3-4 of them underneath the toilet seat of your enemy. When they sit down, it will trigger small explosions that will make them jump out of their seat.
- This prank requires you to either sneak into their house or set up the trap before they go to the restroom at school or work.
Serve Your Enemy a Mayonnaise-Filled Cake. Carefully cut a hole in a donut or Danish pastry and replace the sweet filling with mayonnaise. Then, reassemble the pastry and place it in a spot where your enemy can easily see it. Watch their face closely as they bite into the cursed treat, so they know you've outwitted them. The taste will haunt them forever whenever they see desserts again.
- This prank can be done with any cream-filled pastries such as cream puffs, éclairs, or macarons.
- Tricking someone into eating expired mayo-filled treats is a great way to punish those who steal others' food without asking.
Disrupt Their Rest with Harassing Phone Calls. If you have your enemy's phone number, you have the perfect tool to ruin their sleep. Simply enter their number into a free alarm service like Snoozester or WakeUpDialer, set the time (the earlier the better), and imagine their disheveled face when they're jolted awake by an automated message at the crack of dawn.
- Your enemy might block your number once they realize what's happening. Be sure to use a different website each day to ensure they receive a call ruining their sleep every single morning.
- Take it up a notch by scheduling calls every hour throughout the night. This way, just as they manage to fall back asleep, they’ll be startled awake again.
Hire Professionals to Execute Your Revenge Secretly and Effectively. The revenge-for-hire industry is booming. For a fair price, a company like Nefarious Jobs, operating online, will plan and carry out your revenge for you, so you don’t have to get your hands dirty. Just sit back, relax, and savor the pain of your enemy.
- Some services provided by these companies include sending envelopes filled with itching powder, revealing their favorite TV show spoilers, or spreading rumors about some bizarre illness they supposedly have.
- The best part is that most of these services are anonymous, so there’s no way for your enemy to trace it back to you.
- Some companies also offer consulting services if you prefer to carry out the revenge yourself, rather than hiring someone else.
Hire an Advertising Plane to Send a Toxic Message from the Sky. Contact a local commercial aviation service that specializes in skywriting. Then, enjoy watching the sky as it displays a massive message revealing the most sensitive secrets of your enemy.
- Send a sharp and devastating message like 'Phương owes money' or 'Green Tea Mind' that will leave your enemy humiliated.
- Book the flight on a beautiful day, ideally at a location where many people who know your enemy gather, such as a downtown area or an outdoor event.
- Skywriting is a striking, intricate method of revenge but it doesn’t come cheap. Expect to pay between $1,000 and $3,000 for a flight, and around $500 per hour, with $2 per square meter for a custom banner.
Destroy Your Enemy's Reputation or Relationships. Call their parents and have a serious conversation about their child’s inappropriate behavior. Send a message to their boyfriend/girlfriend confirming you saw them hugging someone else, causing a rift. Spread rumors about their friends so that everyone believes it’s them who’s the one stirring up the trouble. This method may seem low, but it works.
- Remember, this kind of revenge often drags innocent people into the chaos. It's a reckless revenge storm that destroys everything in its path.
Warning: Be careful not to make accusations that could land you in legal trouble. Defamation is a crime, and you don’t want your personal matters to end up in court.
Consider a More Positive Alternative to Revenge
Don’t Lower Yourself to Your Enemy’s Level. If someone causes you pain and suffering, the worst thing you can do is seek revenge just to prove a point. Doing so will only degrade your honor, integrity, and dignity to their level. Stick to your own values and rise above them.
- Choosing not to act on vengeful urges is also a powerful act. It loudly and clearly shows that you alone control your actions.
- A Spanish proverb says: 'The most honorable revenge is doing nothing at all.'
Confide in friends and family. Have a conversation with a loved one about the actions of your enemy and how they’ve affected you. Often, the fire of hatred is stoked by hurt, not by anger. By processing your emotions and confronting the mistreatment, you’ll find peace and move forward with your life.
- Receiving comfort from those who care about you is much more pleasant and effective than finding ways to make your enemy bow down. In fact, scientific studies show that revenge doesn’t actually make people feel any better.
Focus on the positive aspects that can come from the situation rather than the negative ones. Planning revenge may make you feel exhilarated, but if taken too far, it will overshadow your life. Resist the urge to reopen old wounds by adopting a positive attitude and being grateful for life. In doing so, you can break the cycle of anger and rivalry that threatens the health of your mind.
- Try to view your enemy’s actions as an underlying blessing. For example, they may have been a friend but then betrayed you, and this betrayal serves as a reminder to be cautious when inviting people into your social circle.
- Don’t feel bad about becoming the target of their schemes. The truth is, their actions reflect how much they care about undermining your happiness.
Use your enemy's hostility as fuel for motivation. Hurtful words and actions may sting, but they can also propel you forward. Transform what would usually breed hatred into energy for workouts, studying, or learning new hobbies. In the end, becoming better at what you do is the ultimate way to stick it to those who wish you harm.
- High-intensity workouts like weightlifting, sprints, rowing, or interval training are excellent ways to release energy and improve your health.
- When someone tries to bring you down, you have two choices: let their words erode you, or use them to push you to greater heights.
Warning: Anger and exercise are not a beneficial combination – recent studies have found that working out while angry triples the risk of heart attack.
Resist the urge for revenge
Confront your enemy directly about their actions. Before you dream of ruining their life, make an effort to calm things down. Let them know clearly what they've done that you don’t appreciate and how it makes you feel. As someone in a higher position, it's your responsibility to avoid escalating things beyond control.
- For example, standing up to bullies will often make them hesitate. Look them in the eye and firmly say, "That’s enough. I’m tired of you." Or you could approach it through dialogue: "What’s your issue? Have I done something to you?"
- If the person causing you distress is a colleague, be careful with your choice of words to avoid conflict and damaging your professional relationship. It's also a good idea to have a manager intervene discreetly.
Defeat a bully with a sharp comeback. Sometimes, a sharp remark is all it takes to put someone in their place. The next time they hassle you, think carefully and respond accordingly. If you manage to deflate their ego, they’ll think twice before crossing you again.
- If they insult you with, "Are you still wearing diapers?" you can counter with, "What, you want to borrow one?"
- A shining example of putting a challenger in their place comes from the poet Dorothy Parker. When confronted by a drunken critic who said, "I can’t stand idiots," she calmly replied, "But your mother can."
Pro Tip: The best comebacks are usually spontaneous, so they can’t be easily rehearsed. For inspiration, try watching movies by the Marx Brothers or performances by famous stand-up comedians to see how they handle difficult situations.
Ignore them. Instead of dwelling on your enemy’s harassment or forcing yourself to get back at them, simply remove them from your mind. The best way to regain power over your enemy is to stop giving them your time, energy, and attention. If they want to cause trouble, let them, while you keep moving forward.
- Take practical steps to remove them from your life: block them on social media, avoid places they frequent, and don’t hesitate to brush them off if they try to talk to you.
- If you let their words and actions invade your mind when they’re not around, you’ve allowed them to win.
Take a moment to think before seeking revenge. Your desire for revenge will be strongest when the hurtful action, event, or behavior is still fresh in your mind, and it’s during these moments that your judgment is clouded by negative emotions. Even though you may feel compelled to even the score, hold off for a moment. Once you’ve let go of anger and resentment, you’ll find that the urge for revenge fades.
- Even if you don’t feel better after letting go, at least you’ll have a clearer perspective on the situation, which helps you plan a more constructive course of action.
Advice
- If your enemy causes harm to you or your property in a way that breaks the law, do not let it slide. Report them to the authorities and seek justice for yourself.
Warning
- Never engage in dangerous or illegal activities, or cause unnecessary damage to property in your efforts to get back at your enemy. Otherwise, you may be the one facing trouble.
