How to Stop Using Profanity

Seek help from friends. Sharing your struggles or goals with a friend or partner can make the process easier and even more enjoyable. You can ask for their assistance in one of two ways:

• You can team up with a friend who shares the same issue and work together to eliminate the habit, or you can ask a "clean-mouthed ally" (someone who doesn't swear) to monitor your language and gently remind you when you slip up.
• Either way, having someone hold you accountable when you swear can help you stay committed and break the habit for good.

Identify triggers and find ways to avoid them. Everyone has specific triggers that lead them to swear. For some, it’s traffic; for others, it’s waiting in line at the supermarket; and for some, it’s when a character in "Game of Thrones" dies. If you can pinpoint your triggers, you can avoid them—by leaving for work 30 minutes earlier to dodge traffic, shopping online, or rewatching "Friends" instead of "Game of Thrones."

• Avoiding situations that spark negative emotions will make it easier to control your language.

Use a swear jar. The swear jar is a tried-and-true method that has helped many people break the habit of swearing. It’s typically a large jar or money box (something you can’t easily break) where you deposit 10,000 VND (or any amount you choose) every time you swear. You can view the jar as both a punishment and a long-term reward:

• It’s a punishment because you have to part with your money each time you slip up. But it’s also a reward because once the jar is full (or when you’ve successfully stopped swearing—whichever comes first), you can use the money for anything you like—whether it’s buying yourself new books or donating it to charity.
• Keeping the swear jar in the office is a great idea if you’ve convinced others to join your effort. Everyone holds each other accountable, ensuring no one sneaks out of contributing. Once the jar is full, you can celebrate by buying a coffee machine for your team.

Snap a rubber band on your wrist. This method is similar to using a shock collar on a dog to curb bad behavior—though less extreme, it’s highly effective. Essentially, all you need to do is tie a rubber band or hair tie around your wrist and snap it against your skin every time you swear.

• This action will train your brain to associate swearing with pain, making you think twice before cursing.
• If you’re serious about this method, you can even allow a friend (preferably someone who doesn’t enjoy others’ suffering) to snap the band for you. Just make sure you’re fully on board before starting.

Pretend your grandmother is always listening. Another way to train yourself to think before swearing is to imagine someone is always listening to you. This could be your grandmother, your boss, or a child in your household—anyone who would make you feel ashamed if you swore in front of them.

• Whenever you swear, picture them standing beside you with a shocked or horrified expression. This will help deter you.

Avoid music with explicit lyrics and TV shows that allow swearing. Many people, especially teenagers, swear due to the influence of explicit content in the music, movies, or TV shows they enjoy. If you think this applies to you, and you swear like your favorite rapper, it’s time to ground yourself and remind yourself that this isn’t how people communicate in the real world. Switch to polite pop music, or at least download the clean versions of your favorite songs.

Convince yourself that swearing is a negative behavior. Swearing occurs in various contexts—you might curse when angry or frustrated, when trying to emphasize a point, or even when attempting to be humorous. Swearing is a bad habit for several reasons. It can make you appear unintelligent or uneducated, even if that’s not the case. It can be shocking or perceived as bullying if directed at someone. It can also be offensive or uncomfortable for listeners, potentially hindering your career advancement or damaging your chances of forming meaningful relationships.

• Your swearing habit might have developed during childhood if you were frequently exposed to foul language at home. Alternatively, it could have started in your teenage years when you tried to appear "cool" in front of your peers.
• Regardless of the reason, there’s no need to dwell on the past or blame others. What matters is recognizing the issue and committing to overcoming it.

Practice positive thinking. Positive thinking is essential for breaking the habit of swearing. This is because people often curse when complaining, feeling unhappy, or simply being negative. By adopting a positive mindset, you eliminate the need to swear. Admittedly, learning to think positively can be challenging. If you find yourself leaning toward negative thoughts or emotions, pause, take a deep breath, and ask yourself, "Does this really matter?"

• For example, ask yourself, "Is being a few minutes late to a meeting a big deal?" or "Does it really matter if I can’t find the TV remote and have to press the buttons on the TV instead?" Putting situations into perspective can help you stay calm and overcome negativity.
• Additionally, you need to think positively about your ability to stop swearing. If you approach the situation with doubt and negativity, you’re setting yourself up for failure. Remind yourself that if people can quit smoking or lose dozens of kilograms through dieting, you can definitely stop swearing!

Be patient with yourself. Swearing is a habit that may have been part of your life for years, becoming second nature. Like any ingrained habit, you won’t break it overnight. Training yourself to stop swearing is a long process with good and bad days, but the key is to keep trying. Remind yourself why you want to do this and visualize how good it will feel when you finally overcome this bad habit.

• Reflect on why you want to stop swearing. Perhaps you’re worried about making a bad impression at a new job or don’t want to set a poor example for your children. Use these reasons as motivation to keep going.
• No matter what, don’t give up. Build your self-control and remind yourself that you can achieve anything with determination!

Pay attention to your swearing habits. Occasionally, you might forgive yourself for slipping out a few inappropriate words—but if you frequently swear, unable to go a sentence or two without cursing, it’s time to admit you have a problem. The first step to training yourself to stop swearing is recognizing when it happens. Do you only curse around certain people or in specific situations? Do you often rely on a particular swear word? Try to identify why you swear and the role these words play in your language.

• Once you start noticing your swearing habit, you might be surprised at how often you use it to express yourself. Don’t be discouraged—this is the first step toward fixing the issue.
• As you become more aware of your own swearing, you’ll also start noticing when others curse, even if you didn’t before. This is a good thing, as it helps you understand how uncomfortable and negative swear words can come across.

Replace swear words with harmless alternatives. Once you’ve identified your primary swearing habits, you can plan to eliminate foul language from everyday conversations. This is when you tend to swear regardless of the reason—you’re not upset, you didn’t slip up—you’re just using it as a common rhetorical device. You can fix this by replacing inappropriate words with harmless ones, perhaps something that starts with the same letter or sound but isn’t offensive.

• For example, you could replace "f***" with "fudge" or "sh**" with "sugar." At first, these might sound silly, but you’ll get used to them. Using nonsense words might even remove the need to express yourself negatively altogether.
• Even if you slip up and let out a swear word, immediately replace it with your chosen alternative. Over time, your brain will form a connection between the two, and you’ll naturally choose the better word.

Expand your vocabulary. Swear words are often used because of a "lack of better words." However, this is just an excuse, as there are plenty of excellent words you can choose that allow you to express yourself more eloquently and effectively than cursing. By expanding your vocabulary and using it to replace common swear words, you’ll sound smarter, more articulate, and more confident.

• Make a list of the swear words you use most often, then use a thesaurus to find alternatives. For example, instead of frequently saying "WTF," replace it with something more descriptive and humorous, like "What in the world?" or "Good grief!"
• You can further enhance your vocabulary by reading more books and articles. Write down descriptive words you like and try to incorporate them into your speech. Additionally, pay attention to how others express themselves without swearing and learn from their phrasing.