How to Talk to Your Girlfriend on the Phone

Quality conversations are the key to success in any relationship. Even in today's world of texts and social media, 87% of teenagers still prefer talking to their significant others over the phone. Putting effort into phone calls shows her that you genuinely care and want to make her feel loved and appreciated. Whether she's a long-time girlfriend or a new crush, you can use these tips to make her feel on top of the world.

Consider your girlfriend's schedule. Arrange a time to chat via text or wait for a time when you think she’s free to talk. Don’t create inconvenience or make her choose between you and her friends or family. You can call after her drama club rehearsal, after sports practice, when her shift at the café is over, or after dinner at home.

• Text her a few hours before you plan to call: Are you free tonight to chat? or Can I call you at 7 PM? Make sure to be flexible and consider a time that works for both of you.
  If she’s busy:
  Don't: get upset or give her the silent treatment.
  Do: say How about tomorrow night instead? or Good luck on your exam! Let’s talk over the weekend?

Call in a quiet and private place. Girls are more likely to open up and be honest with you when they know no one can overhear your conversation. Avoid calling her while you're out with other people, and don't use speakerphone without asking her first.

Give her your full attention. Your girlfriend is offering you her time, so you should reciprocate. Most young people find that their conversations are interrupted when they're multitasking. Show her that talking to her is the most important thing in your life. Don't text, chat online, watch TV, or talk to others while on the phone with her.

Greet her with enthusiasm. Emotions are contagious. If your voice sounds friendly and warm, she will respond in kind. When she picks up the phone, greet her in a way that opens up the conversation and shows you're eager to hear from her. Use words that match the level of closeness between the two of you:

• Hey! What’s my little one up to?
• Hello, beautiful! How’s your day going?
• I’ve been waiting all day just to hear your voice! What have you been up to?

Leave a sweet voicemail message. If she doesn't answer and your call goes to voicemail, leave a short and sweet message. She’ll appreciate that you were thinking of her and will love hearing your voice.

• If you’ve been together for a while, you might say: I just called to tell you I love you!
• If your relationship is still new, leave a more casual message like: I just wanted to check if you're doing well. I miss you!
• Let her know the best time to call you back so you don’t end up playing phone tag: I’ll be home by 7 PM after my soccer practice. Can we talk then?

Start with some casual conversation. Humans are naturally social creatures and enjoy talking with each other. Casual chats help create a sense of connection as you get to know one another. Even the most trivial conversations can hold great meaning in a new relationship. You can begin with topics that make her feel at ease, like:

• Share a story about your day.
• Ask about her favorite sports team.
• Talk about an event that happened at school.
• Discuss a TV show or movie you both recently watched.
  If the conversation gets dull:
  Don’t: interrupt or abruptly end the conversation.
  Do: ask questions that lead to a more interesting topic.

Compliment her. Let her know you enjoy the conversation and appreciate her presence. Say encouraging words to help her open up more, but avoid overdoing it:

• Your story was so interesting!
• This is so fun!
• I’m so curious to see what happens next!
• You’re really easy to talk to.
  Don’t: repeat the same generic compliments all the time.
  Do: say I love how excited your voice gets when you talk about__.

Let the conversation flow naturally. If you both click, small talk will naturally lead to deeper discussions. Transition from light topics to more personal ones. Take advantage of opportunities to understand each other better:

• I’m learning to play the guitar too! Why did you pick the guitar over other instruments?
• You’re getting your driver’s license in three months? Where do you plan to drive once you have your car?
• Only two weeks until the holidays! Do you have any vacation plans for the break?

Express your feelings. She will be more open and honest with you when you do the same. Most people hold back their true emotions because they fear rejection, not because they don’t care. If you express how much she means to you, she’ll feel comfortable doing the same in return.

• Every time I see you, it feels like the world lights up.
• You’re the most beautiful girl in the city.
• No one understands me like you do.

Ask open-ended questions. Choose questions that make your girlfriend feel comfortable sharing stories, recalling past experiences, and expressing emotions. Avoid asking questions that only lead to a simple 'yes' or 'no' answer.

Be a good listener. Conversation is a two-way street, and listening is just as important as speaking. Don't interrupt or talk over her. Pay attention to what she's saying, wait for her to finish her thought, and then ask follow-up questions. Encourage her to share more.

• What happened next?
• How did that make you feel?
• Why do you love that bubble tea place so much?

Avoid topics that make conversations awkward. Be sincere with your girlfriend, but don't criticize or make her uncomfortable. Gauge her enthusiasm during the chat. If she's engaged with the topic, you can dive deeper, but if she seems hesitant or replies with I don’t know, Maybe, or I guess, steer the conversation in a different direction.

• Learn to recognize sensitive topics as you get to know her better, and avoid those that could bring up uncomfortable memories. Conversations should be positive. Don’t bring up sad events like parents divorcing, ex-boyfriends, or the death of a loved one to bond. Let her know she can talk about anything, but don’t purposely stir up negative emotions.
• Excessive displays of affection can make her uncomfortable. Don’t seem too eager or needy. Avoid making inappropriate comments about her appearance that she might not appreciate.
  Don’t: hold back your emotions or be afraid to share personal experiences.
  Do: pay attention to her comfort level and adjust your conversation accordingly in the future.

Plan for the future. Whether you're planning a simple night out or talking about the future, planning together will strengthen the bond between you. Discuss where you'd like to live or travel, the type of dog you'd want, or your dream home. Have fun with it and let your imagination run wild. Keep the conversation lighthearted and intimate: you don’t need to plan a life together just yet. Tell her how excited you are for future adventures together.

End the conversation before it loses its spark. It's better to say goodbye while both of you still have things to talk about, leaving each other looking forward to the next conversation. Suggest topics that you can chat about the next time you call each other.

Tell her how happy you are to talk to her. Let your girlfriend know that she's special and that you enjoy your conversations with her. She’ll be more likely to call you again if she knows you’re excited to hear her voice.

• I can’t wait to talk to you again! Call me anytime!
• I’ll be thinking about your sweet voice all night long.
• Don’t forget to call me!
• I’ll text you first thing in the morning!

Make her smile before you say goodbye. Say something sweet right before you hang up that you know will make her happy. Share inside jokes, tease her with a nickname she loves, or compliment her in a way that’ll make her blush.

• Goodbye, beautiful.
• Sleep tight, my sunshine!
• Kiss, kiss! Sleep well!