Buzz
If you've found yourself wondering whether you secretly have feelings for a certain guy but can't quite figure out if you're just thinking about him more than usual or if you're truly falling for him, you're not alone. You might feel a fluttering sensation when you're near him or be confused about what your feelings mean. To truly understand if you like someone, you need to pay attention to your thoughts, feelings, and actions. If you're unsure about your emotions, consider the following advice.
Steps to Take
Pay Attention to Your Thoughts
If you think you're developing feelings for someone, it's probably true. If you're questioning whether you like him or not and genuinely want to explore these feelings, chances are you do. You may be second-guessing yourself because he’s a longtime friend, an unlikely romantic prospect, or you simply feel confused.
- However, don't overthink it. Liking someone doesn't mean you want them to become your soulmate. It just means you like them and want to spend more time with them.
Pay attention to how often you think about him. This is an easy way to tell if you like someone. Why would you spend so much time thinking about him if he didn't stand out to you? If you find yourself thinking about him repeatedly every few hours, or always wondering what he's up to, it's a sign that you're into him. Here are a few signs that your thoughts might reveal if you're crushing on someone:
- If you catch yourself daydreaming about him during class.
- If you think about him and fall asleep, and even dream about him, even if the dream isn't romantic.
- If you often wonder what he's doing or planning to do.
- If you're always curious about what he thinks about things. What does he think of your new dress, hairstyle, the movie you just watched, or the restaurant you went to?
- Notice how often you think about him each day. Once a day? Maybe not. Once an hour? You might have feelings for him.
Observe if you can concentrate. Difficulty concentrating is another sure sign that you're developing feelings for someone. If you can focus completely on yourself, your grades, or the people around you, it means you're not really thinking about him. But if you find it nearly impossible to get through a page of a book because your mind keeps drifting to him, that's a sign you're really into him.
- If you're so distracted by thoughts of him that you can’t keep up with a conversation with friends for more than five minutes, you've probably got a crush.
- If you can’t read more than a paragraph without imagining his face or wondering if he’s doing his homework, it’s a clear sign you're attracted to him.
- If you find your mind wandering to him during a movie or even a 30-minute TV show, you like him.
- If you're so distracted that you can't concentrate on writing an essay and find yourself doodling his name, you’re definitely crushing.
Think about whether you’ve ever felt this way about someone else. It's possible that this isn’t the first time you’ve had feelings for someone, so take a moment to reflect on any past crushes and compare. Although no two relationships or people are identical, if you’ve experienced similar thoughts about someone before, it's likely that you're developing feelings for this person too.
- Try to recall if you've had similar thoughts about anyone else before. What were your thoughts at the time? If you’re having similar thoughts about this new guy, it's likely you have feelings for him.
- Understand the type of person you’re attracted to. Did you ever deny your feelings for a previous crush? If so, this could be a sign you're into him but in denial.
- If you've never liked anyone before, there may be nothing to compare to. In that case, you may really like him, you just don’t know how to identify those feelings yet!
Pay attention to your feelings
Notice if you feel excited. If you love being around him and feel a sense of excitement whenever you spend more time together, it's a sign you like him. If he makes you feel comfortable rather than excited, it suggests that while you enjoy his company, you might not see him as someone you're attracted to.
- If you can’t sit still when you're around him, that's a sign you like him. If your hands shake or you can't stop talking, or you're fidgeting while speaking, it means your energy is higher than usual because you're into him.
- If you laugh at everything he says, even if it’s not particularly funny, it's a sign you like him. When you're attracted to someone, even the smallest things they say seem humorous.
- If you’re so excited that you can’t sleep at night because you keep thinking about him or replaying your conversation in your head, it's a clear sign you're into him.
- If you feel a rush of excitement or your heart races when he greets you, texts you, or chats with you, or even when he says your name, you definitely like him.
Notice if you feel nervous. When you like someone, you won’t feel completely comfortable around them. Instead, you’ll feel anxious, wondering what they think about you and fearing you might say something wrong. If you feel this nervousness, it means you care about their opinion, and if you care about their opinion... you can probably guess it—you like them.
- If your hands shake, your knees tremble, or your voice quivers when you're around them, it's because they're making you nervous.
- If you find yourself rambling or going completely silent because you’re unsure of what to say, it's a sign that you like them.
- If you’re so nervous that you accidentally bump into things, step on a table, or drop your wallet in front of them, you definitely like them.
- If you blush for no reason or feel embarrassed just by being near them, it’s clear you like them.
Observe how you feel when he’s with other girls. If you like someone, of course, you won’t want them dating, chatting with, or hanging out with other girls. If you feel fine when he has a girlfriend or flirts with other girls, it probably means you don’t have feelings for him.
- If the thought of him dating someone else makes you upset, you probably like him.
- If the idea of him hanging out with other girls frustrates you, it’s a clear sign that you like him. In the future, try not to see this as a problem; otherwise, your jealousy might become a concern.
- If he has a girlfriend and you think he’s in a good relationship with her, and you feel happy for him with no complicated feelings, then he’s probably not the one you like.
Pay attention to what you do
Notice what you say. What you say to him, or even what you say about him when he’s not around, can be a big indicator of whether you like him. Here’s how to tell if your words reveal serious feelings for someone:
- If you find yourself teasing him often, especially without intending to, it’s a sign you like him.
- If you speak quickly or stumble over your words when you need to talk to him, it’s likely because you like him.
- If you’re afraid of saying something foolish in front of him or feel like everything you say makes you seem silly, it’s because you like him. And if you feel like this with every conversation, it's a clear sign.
- If you can’t talk to your friends for more than 10 minutes without mentioning him, you probably have a crush on him. If you like someone, your friends may notice it before you do.
Notice how you act. Your behavior around him says a lot about whether you like him or not, even when he’s not around. Here are some signs that your actions reveal that you’re falling for him:
- If you change your plans just to hang out with him. For example, if you’ve never cared about basketball but suddenly attend school games just to see him in the stands.
- If you always want to be near him whenever you hang out, whether it’s sitting close in a group or even playfully touching him if you can.
- If you can’t stand it when he flirts with other girls while you’re around.
- If you feel disappointed when you go to a place expecting to see him, but he’s not there, it’s a sign you like him.
Notice if you begin to care more about your appearance. It’s unlikely to be a coincidence when you suddenly spend double the time doing your makeup in front of the mirror whenever you plan to meet him. Here’s how grooming habits can reveal if you like him:
- If you go the extra mile to look good before seeing him, like wearing your best outfit, styling your hair just right, or applying makeup carefully because you know he’ll be around.
- If you catch yourself experimenting with new makeup styles or accessories just to catch his attention.
- If you notice you couldn’t care less about your appearance when you’re going somewhere you know he won’t be present.
Notice if you start to change your personality. Let’s say this guy is the athletic, active type. You might find yourself picking up basketball or soccer, or wearing Nike shoes just to get his attention. When you’re trying to make him notice you, it essentially means you like him, and you’re willing to do whatever it takes to catch his eye.
Advice
- If you think you like someone, it’s unlikely you don’t know. If you believe you like him, that thought is probably right.
- It’s normal to feel confused about your feelings.
- Don’t choose someone just for their looks.
- A good friend can often notice who you like before you do. If your friend points it out, it might be time to reflect on it.
- Don’t stress too much. If you enjoy spending time with him, does it really matter whether you 'like' him?
- If you’re unsure whether you like him, ask your friends if you seem shy or anxious whenever he’s around.
- Don’t try to show up everywhere he is. He might think you’re overdoing it.
- Things will happen when they’re meant to. Don’t focus too much on your appearance, because he might like you for who you are.
- Don’t confuse your feelings when you're just hanging out with a good friend. The line between a close friend and someone you like can blur over time.
- If you catch yourself stalking his social media (Instagram, Facebook, etc.), you probably like him.
- If you constantly ask yourself, 'Does he like me?' and smile to yourself, then he’s definitely the one you like.
