Buzz
When embarking on a new relationship, the excitement of constant texting is understandable. While there aren't any specific "rules" for texting, practicing good etiquette can help you communicate more effectively without appearing overly eager. Continue reading for a collection of useful texting tips and example messages to try, no matter the stage of your relationship!
Steps
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Check in with your partner at least once a day.
Consider sending a message in the morning or catching up at night. In the early stages of a relationship, it's perfectly fine if you’re not constantly texting. You can send a sweet good morning message as soon as they wake up, or reach out later to ask about their day. This simple gesture shows that you're thinking of them and care about their life.
- For example, try saying, “Good morning love ❤️ I hope you slept well and have an amazing day ahead 🥰”
- Alternatively, you could text, “Hey, how’s your day been? Mine’s been super busy!”
Make sure to respond to every message you receive.
Even a brief reply shows your partner that you’ve seen their message. Ignoring messages can give the impression that you’re playing mind games. Instead of leaving a message unanswered, send a quick reply to keep the conversation going or simply acknowledge that you've received their text.
- If a message doesn’t require a lengthy reply, feel free to react to it. For example, if your partner tells you they’ll be a little late, just send a thumbs-up emoji.
Match your partner’s texting pace.
If your partner takes a few hours to respond, give yourself that same amount of time before replying. Early in a relationship, frequent texting is common, but it often slows down as you both settle into a more comfortable rhythm. If your partner takes a while to reply, responding immediately could make it seem like you were waiting for their message. Giving yourself a little time before replying helps you seem less clingy.
- If the message is time-sensitive, try to reply as soon as possible.
Wait for a response before sending another message.
Sending multiple texts in a row can feel overwhelming to read. If your partner hasn’t responded immediately, don’t panic and start texting again—they might be busy or unable to check their phone. Instead of stressing or double-texting, try distracting yourself so you’re not constantly checking your phone.
- If your partner missed your message, wait around 4 hours before following up with a gentle reminder.
- For example, you could text, “Hey 🙂 hope you’re having a good afternoon! Did you see my last message?”
- Reader Poll: We asked 635 Mytour readers how they’d react if a girl started hiding her phone, and only 11% said they would give the benefit of the doubt and assume she’s busy. [Take Poll] So, while that may not be the best strategy, stay calm and find something else to do while you wait.
Take turns initiating conversations.
Don’t put the responsibility on one person to always start a conversation. You might have heard that the guy should always text first, but if you’re excited to talk, it’s perfectly fine for you to initiate the conversation. If you typically wait for the other person to message, take the first step and send the initial text. Try to balance who sends the first message so it doesn’t feel like one person is making more of an effort than the other.
Send messages that are more than just one word.
The more you open up, the deeper your conversations will become. A simple “hey” or “hi” doesn’t give your partner much to work with. Try asking open-ended questions to encourage longer replies. Matching the length of your partner’s messages can also help keep the conversation going without awkward pauses.
- For instance, you could say, “Hey! 🥰 How’s your day been so far?”
- One-word replies can come off as passive-aggressive, so consider adding an emoji or a few words. For example, if your partner says they can’t make it, try responding with, “Okay! Maybe we can meet up this weekend instead?”
- If possible, start by sharing something about yourself to give them a deeper insight into who you are. This is far more engaging than simply texting, “Hey, how’s your day?”
Keep the tone light and casual.
Avoid heavy topics to keep texting enjoyable. Texting should feel fun and make you smile, so steer clear of discussing anything too serious. Instead, ask light-hearted questions or use interesting conversation starters to get to know your partner better, while keeping things drama-free.
- For example, you could ask, “What’s your favorite childhood memory?” or “How did you get into music?”
- Consider playing texting games like Would You Rather or Two Truths and a Lie for a playful twist to your chats.
Don’t forget to use emojis.
Emojis help convey your emotions to your partner. It can be tough to read emotions from a text, so it’s important to make sure you’re clear. Choose emojis that match the vibe of your message to avoid any confusion.
- For example, if you’re feeling happy, you might use 🙂, 😄, or 😊.
- For a romantic touch, consider adding 💖, ❤️, or 💘.
- Emojis should complement your message, not replace entire words. Using them to replace words could make your message harder to understand.
Ensure you use proper spelling and grammar.
Avoid overusing abbreviations to keep your message clear. Steer clear of randomly cutting letters or using numbers and emojis in place of words. Take a moment to type your message out fully so it’s easy to read. Always double-check for any spelling mistakes before sending.
- For example, instead of texting, “cn i come ovr plz, i wanna c u,” you could send, “Could I come over? I really want to see you!”
Make sure to plan in-person meetups.
Strengthen your connection by spending time together face-to-face. While texting keeps you in touch, you’ll form a deeper bond when you spend quality time together. Ask when they’re free to hang out or go on a date so you can continue growing your relationship. If meeting up isn’t possible, try to schedule a phone or video call to hear each other’s voices.
- For example, you could text, “Are you free on Friday night for dinner?” or “My friends are hosting a big party this Saturday—do you want to be my date? 😘”
Discuss with your partner how often you’d like to text each other.
Be open about your needs when it comes to texting frequency. Everyone has different preferences when it comes to texting, and some might feel overwhelmed if they’re expected to keep up a constant conversation. Have a conversation with your partner about what you both expect from your texting habits and try to find a happy medium.
- For instance, you could agree to check in once in the morning and once in the evening.
- As your relationship evolves, your texting habits may shift. You might find yourselves texting less often as you save topics for when you meet in person later that day.
Think carefully before sending any intimate photos.
Only share intimate photos if it’s something you’re comfortable with and if it’s consensual. Avoid sending unsolicited pictures, as this could make your partner uncomfortable. Keep in mind that once you send a picture, it’s possible for it to be saved or shared, even if you intended it to be seen by just one person. Never feel pressured to send something you’re not comfortable with.
- If you’re unsure whether your partner is interested in receiving a photo, you could text something like, “I’ve got something sexy I could share with you if you want 😉” or “Would you be in the mood for some pictures right now? 😏😘”
- If you’re not comfortable sending pictures and your partner asks, try saying something like, “I’m not really up for that, but I’d still love to keep chatting,” or “I’m not ready for that yet, sorry.”
Save important conversations for when you’re in person.
Your feelings are much clearer when you talk face-to-face. It’s easy to misinterpret or misunderstand messages over text, so it’s better to discuss any major issues in person. If your partner brings up something serious via text, suggest a time to meet and talk face-to-face, or at least have a phone conversation.
- For example, you might say, “This seems really important, and I don’t want to misinterpret your words. Can we meet up to discuss this in person?”
If you don’t hear back after three days, it’s time to move on.
You deserve someone who values your time and conversation. While it’s important for people to speak up if they’re not interested in a relationship, some may simply ghost you and stop responding. Instead of waiting endlessly for someone to text you back, redirect your focus to other people who value communication. We know it’s hard if someone you were interested in doesn’t respond, but remember, someone out there is better suited for you.
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If you’re having difficulty reading your partner’s feelings over text, assume they mean well and ask for clarification if needed.
Important Reminders
- In the beginning, it’s best not to share too much personal information, like details about your past relationships. As you continue to connect and build trust, you’ll find it easier to open up about your experiences over time.
