Is jealousy a sign of love?

Yes, occasionally feeling jealous is normal. No matter who you are, you’ve probably experienced jealousy at some point while in a relationship. Perhaps you noticed someone flirting with your partner, or your significant other seems interested in someone else. Jealousy arises because you don't want your other half to be with anyone else; you want them all to yourself!

It could be. If your partner's actions make you feel jealous, it might stem from a lack of belief that they can interact with others without being influenced by someone else. This could be because they have a questionable history, or perhaps you have been hurt in the past. While jealousy doesn't always equate to distrust, it can certainly be a sign of it.

You may feel jealous when you see someone else being attracted to your partner. Imagine this: you and your partner are at a party. You step away to use the restroom and return to find your partner in an engaging conversation with someone – and they appear to be flirting. The jealousy you feel in this moment is completely normal – you might step in and join the conversation, or later ask your partner about the person. A little jealousy in love is entirely acceptable, as long as it doesn't spiral into obsession or control.

• Sometimes, mild jealousy can make you appreciate your partner more. When you see your partner attracting others, it serves as a reminder of what you have and why you love them so much.

Jealousy can stem from feelings of insecurity. If you feel unworthy of your partner, you may constantly worry that one day they will find someone else. This can lead to jealousy, as you feel uneasy whenever your partner interacts with others. While jealousy doesn't make you or your partner a bad person, it does indicate there are underlying issues that need to be addressed in order to maintain a healthy relationship.

• You can work on boosting your self-esteem by consulting a mental health professional. They offer specific exercises to help you treat yourself better and build confidence.

Jealousy can sometimes arise from unrealistic expectations. If you want to be with your partner all the time, but they need some personal space (or vice versa), jealousy may occur. You can handle this by sitting down with your partner to discuss what both of you want. By doing so, you'll find a balanced solution that works for both, and the jealousy will fade away.

• For example, each week, you both could set aside two or three nights to enjoy an evening just for the two of you, and one or two other nights to hang out with friends. This way, each person gets their own space while still having quality time together.

Yes, jealousy can help couples set boundaries in their relationship. Sometimes, jealousy is a perfectly normal (and reasonable) reaction to someone's actions. If you feel that boundaries have been crossed, sit down and talk with your partner. You can explain why you're feeling jealous, and your partner can help ease your emotions.

• For instance, you might feel jealous or anxious when your partner goes out without telling you where they're going. You could say, 'I feel a bit uneasy when you go out all night without talking to me. I’d appreciate it if you could text me occasionally to let me know where you are.'

You constantly check where your partner is. It's fine to feel worried or ask your partner where they're going, but jealousy might lead you to take it too far, such as calling or texting repeatedly just to know their whereabouts. Some people who are very jealous even install tracking apps to keep tabs on their partner whenever they go out.

You monitor your partner's messages, calls, or emails. Jealousy can sometimes make us imagine that our partner is having intimate conversations with others. If you keep demanding to see your partner's phone or computer, this is a clear sign of jealousy and can quickly become toxic. Everyone deserves privacy, even in a romantic relationship.

You don't want your partner to meet their friends. If you're jealous of your partner's friendships, you might start subtly trying to separate them from their friends. It's understandable to want to spend time with your partner, but if you don't want them hanging out with others, there's definitely an issue.

Yes, jealousy can be a sign that your partner is controlling. Sometimes, people feel jealous because they want to completely control their partner. If your partner begins showing jealous behavior or interfering with who you interact with, it might be best to consider ending the relationship.

• Jealousy isn't always an indicator of an abusive relationship, but it can certainly be one. If your partner constantly accuses you of cheating, calls or texts you randomly to 'catch' you doing something, or forbids you from seeing friends and family, it's a sign that your relationship might be turning unhealthy.

Jealousy can gradually erode trust. If you're in a relationship with someone who is constantly jealous, it can be frustrating to be repeatedly asked where you are or who you're with. Being tormented by accusations can make you feel like your partner doesn't trust you, and this leads to resentment. Healthy relationships are built on trust, and jealousy signals that trust is lacking between the two of you.

Jealousy can lead to abusive or controlling behavior. While jealousy doesn't necessarily lead to abuse, it's one of the red flags to be aware of when entering a new relationship. As jealousy builds over time, the person might try to control where you go and who you meet. If you feel trapped in an abusive relationship, you can call a domestic violence hotline for help.

• If you're in Vietnam, you can call the domestic violence hotline at 1900 1768. If you're in the U.S., dial 1-800-799-7233 to speak with a domestic violence counselor.