Buzz
So, you’ve found yourself in a situation where you need to back out of plans. Whether you were plotting your escape right after agreeing or you genuinely had the intention to show up, but something changed—don’t worry, we’ve all been there. If you’re stuck trying to figure out what to say, we’ve compiled a list of foolproof excuses to keep you out of trouble and give you an easy way out of that awkward metal band gig with your friend’s cousin.
What You Need to Keep in Mind
- Keep it short. The more detailed your excuse, the less likely it will hold up, and the harder it will be to remember the next time someone asks about it.
- Being honest can be tricky, but usually it’s the best option. Everyone understands the urge to cancel plans, and sometimes just saying you need a break is excuse enough.
- If you’re backing out of a gathering with close friends or family, they’ll probably get it and forgive you, so don’t stress too much about it.
Steps to Take
You're feeling under the weather.
With so many illnesses circulating, it's no surprise when you catch something. Whether it’s Covid, the flu, or a simple cold, even a trip to the store can expose you to germs you don’t want to pass around. Make sure you have your excuse prepared before canceling your plans and get ready to pretend until you feel better.
- "I woke up feeling a bit off today. I think I’ll rest and take it easy; I’m worried it’ll get worse if I don’t."
- "Sorry, but I have to cancel. I went out last night and must’ve eaten something bad, I’ve been sick all morning."
- "I think I picked something up at that party the other night. Some others are sick too, so I need to reschedule."
You’ve got to work late.
People understand the pressure of deadlines. Everyone gets it—work or school projects need to be finished, so it shouldn’t be hard to explain why you have to cancel. If you have time before your plans, mention that big project you’ve been tackling so they aren’t caught off guard when you need to bail.
- "Sorry to cancel last minute, but this work project is really piling up. I thought I’d be done by now, but I’m not."
- "I just got my essay feedback for (insert class), and I literally have to rewrite everything. I’d rather be with you, but I can’t make it tonight."
- "My team is behind on the project we’re working on, so I’ll need to step in and get things done. Sorry I won’t be there tonight."
You need some time for yourself.
Taking a mental health break is both important and completely understandable. If you're feeling overwhelmed and need some space, it’s not just an excuse—it’s a valid reason. Sometimes life can feel like too much all at once, and you need a breather.
- "Hey, I've got so much on my plate right now that I think it's best for me to cancel our plans and recharge."
- "I've been feeling really stressed lately, and it’s finally catching up with me today. Can we reschedule for another time?"
- "Hey, I’m struggling with a lot of anxiety today, and I don’t think I’d be good company. Let’s plan something when I’m in a better headspace."
You can't find a way to get there.
Transportation issues happen to everyone at some point. Whether it’s your car acting up or public transit failing you, it’s a reality we all face, and sometimes it’s just bad timing. Why not use this as an excuse?
- "Hey, I think I left my interior light on or something, and now my car won’t start. I’ll need to replace the battery, so I’ll have to miss our plans tonight."
- "(Friend/family member) was supposed to give me a ride, but they bailed, and now I’m too late to make it. Everyone I asked said no, so I guess I’ll have to cancel."
- "Bad news, I got a flat tire while running errands this morning. I’m stuck waiting for a replacement, and it’s taking way longer than expected. Sorry, but I’ll be home for the rest of the day."
Your family showed up unexpectedly.
Family can always surprise you with an unplanned visit. Friends usually understand that family obligations take priority, so don’t hesitate to use a family visit as a reason to cancel plans if you need to. Strengthen your excuse and avoid the awkward follow-up questions by mentioning your family member.
- "Hey, my dad just texted to say he’s in town and wants to hang out tonight. I hate to cancel, but I haven’t seen him in ages."
- "My cousin just flew in, and now the whole family is getting together. I hope you understand if I reschedule—it's the first time in a while we’ve all been together."
- "Sorry to cancel, but my brother needs me to take care of his sick dog while he's at work. The dog needs medication every few hours, and he can’t get time off."
You have a medical appointment.
Medical appointments have a way of sneaking up on you. Remember that doctor's appointment you scheduled months ago? Neither do we. Whether it's a routine check-up, a dentist visit, or a follow-up for that odd rash on your foot, medical appointments are a legitimate excuse to back out of your plans without much hassle. Just be careful if your plans are for the evening—having an appointment after 5:00 pm is a bit of a stretch unless it's an emergency.
- "Hey, (your parent, your doctor's office) just reminded me I have a doctor's appointment I totally forgot about. I'm so sorry, but I need to cancel."
- "I thought my dentist appointment was months away, but apparently, I've got a filling scheduled that I didn’t remember. Don’t worry—I’m already prepared for the drill."
- "I’m not sure if it's stress or something else, but I've got this rash on my back that’s been bothering me. I’m going to have it checked out, so I’ll need to reschedule our plans."
You don’t have anyone to watch your child.
Everyone knows you can’t leave a child unsupervised. Finding a sitter isn’t always easy or cheap, and if you’re looking for an excuse, needing to watch a child is pretty foolproof.
- "Hey, my parents are heading out tonight and don't have anyone to watch (your sibling), so looks like I’ll be stuck with them. Sorry!"
- "I can't find anyone to watch (child's name), so I won’t be able to make it. I'll make it up to you soon, promise."
- "Sorry to cancel, but my friend had a family emergency and asked if I could look after her son while she deals with it."
You’ve got a household emergency.
Home problems can strike when you least expect them. There’s nothing worse than being hit with an urgent household issue, especially when you’ve already made plans. Just make sure to remember the details of whatever’s going wrong at home, in case you need to explain it later.
- "Absolute disaster here! My sink just sprung a leak, and it’s flooding the kitchen. I’m really sorry, but I need to take care of this right away."
- "(Whoever you live with) just called to say I have to be home to wait for the plumber. Apparently, our toilet's clogged. I’d much rather be with you, but life has other plans right now."
- "Hey, I’m going to have to cancel, our sprinklers are going off, and we can’t get them to turn off."
You’ve hurt yourself.
Accidents happen when you least expect them, and they’ll get you sympathy. One second you’re fine, and the next, you’ve stubbed your toe or twisted your ankle. These things happen without warning, so you don’t need to worry about making up an excuse ahead of time. Just go with a minor injury so it sounds more believable and doesn't make anyone worry.
- "I tripped during my run this morning and sprained my ankle. I’m sorry to cancel, but I’ll be on the couch with an ice pack for the next few days."
- "I went a little too hard in yoga yesterday and pulled a muscle. I hope you understand, but I can’t even put on pants without pain right now."
- "I was moving a heavy box today while organizing my house and totally threw my back out. I need to reschedule, I’m out of commission."
You forgot someone's birthday.
Forgetting someone's birthday can be your ticket to canceling plans. Whoops, you just realized it's your cousin Jimmy’s birthday, and the whole family’s getting together. Guess your dinner plans are going to have to wait. Just make sure the person you’re canceling on can’t figure out the real birthday of the person you're using as an excuse.
- "My friend hates celebrating his birthday, so I didn’t think he’d want anything, but he just called me upset and alone. I need to spend the evening with him if that’s okay."
- "I totally forgot it’s my grandma’s birthday today! I feel terrible, but I need to be there with her."
- "Hey, it turns out my family is getting together for my uncle’s birthday, so I need to reschedule. Wish me luck!"
You've come into contact with someone who's sick.
Nothing works better than the possibility of being contagious to cancel plans. If you don’t feel like pretending to be ill but still need a way out, you can say you were around someone who’s feeling under the weather. Just make sure to suggest catching up later when you’re both in the clear.
- "Hey, I picked up my friend from the airport the other night, and she’s not feeling too great. I’m worried I might’ve caught whatever she has, so it’s probably best if we wait a bit before meeting up."
- "Sorry to cancel, but someone at (work, school, etc.) tested positive for Covid, and now I need to quarantine for a few days."
- "I went out with my (friend/family) last night, and they just texted me that they’re feeling really sick. I’m going to hold off on seeing you until they get their test results back, just to be safe."
Your friend needs emotional support.
Supporting your loved ones is something everyone can understand. Most people know what it’s like to get a call from a friend or family member who’s going through a rough time. If your friend is struggling and needs you to be there for them, it’s usually respected if you go support them—just try to be there for your real friends when they need you as well.
- "Hey, my cousin’s going through a tough breakup and really needs someone to talk to. I hope you don’t mind, but I want to be there for her."
- "My friend’s been dealing with some issues, and I think it would really help if I went over to talk things through. Can we reschedule for another time?"
- "Hey, my friend’s been feeling down due to health problems, and she asked if I could come over to keep her company. I hate to cancel, but I think it’s important I be there for her."
You’ve accidentally double-booked yourself.
It always seems like everything happens at once. You can go weeks without any plans, and then suddenly you find yourself booked for two things at the same time. Whether you need to cancel on one person for another or just need a break, claiming you've double-booked yourself is a perfectly reasonable excuse. Plus, there's a good chance the other person is looking for an excuse to cancel too!
- "I feel so bad, but I completely forgot I made plans with my mom for dinner months ago! Can we do something next week instead?"
- "Do you mind if we cancel? Something came up at (school, work, etc.) that I need to handle."
- "Hey, this is kind of lame, but the finale of my favorite show is tonight, and it’s a family tradition for us to watch it together. Can we reschedule?"
You're low on cash.
Sometimes, going out just isn't in the budget. Fun can get expensive, and many people know the feeling of being tight on money. If the plans you need to back out of involve spending money, don't feel bad about admitting you're broke. Just be careful not to post on social media if you end up going out later.
- "I’d love to go out to dinner tonight, but my budget's a bit tight. Can we reschedule for next week when I get paid?"
- "That (activity) is a little too expensive for me right now. I’d love to join you, but it’s just too much at the moment."
- "I’d love to go shopping with you, but honestly, I can’t afford anything right now, and even window shopping is a little depressing."
You just can't be bothered.
Honesty often works best. Sometimes, the stress of coming up with an elaborate excuse isn’t worth it. Being honest means you won’t have to remember a fake story later on. Keep your response short and straightforward, and don’t overthink it.
- "I’m really not up for it today."
- "Let’s reschedule for another time. I’m super tired and need some time to myself."
- "I thought I’d be more excited about our plans, but I’ve decided I just don’t want to go. Can we do something else instead?"
Participate in the conversation...
I’m really not in the mood to leave the house this weekend, but I’ve already committed to a party. I don’t want to come off as flaky, so what are some of the best excuses to avoid going out?
A simple way to cancel plans is by telling the person you're feeling drained and need some time to yourself. If you want to add some extra weight to it, you can mention that you're not feeling well or that something unexpected came up—like a surprise family visit or a scheduling conflict.
Anonymous wikiCheetah
I agree that being upfront is usually the best approach to avoid being caught in a lie later. Most of my friends are understanding when I need some alone time, so I just tell them honestly. I'd recommend suggesting a time to reschedule, so they don't feel hurt that you had to cancel.
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