Buzz
Continuing from our earlier collections, Top 15 Truly Bizarre Patents and Another 10 Bizarre (and Stupid) Patents, we’ve assembled a third installment showcasing the most peculiar and outlandish inventions. These examples might inspire aspiring inventors with seemingly absurd ideas—patent them regardless, as many others have!
10. Urinal Forehead Support
Patent Number: US 6681419
“A device designed to support a standing user’s forehead against a wall above a toilet, urinal, or below a showerhead. The apparatus features a mounting piece that attaches to a vertical bathroom wall, either above the toilet or urinal or beneath the showerhead. A cushioned headrest extends from the wall and mounting piece, providing a soft, resilient surface positioned at a height and distance from the wall that allows the user to comfortably lean their forehead against it while using the facilities.” Seriously—have you ever felt the need for such a thing? Even in my most inebriated state, I’ve never required head support while using the restroom.
9. Braces Reminder System
Patent Number: US 4764111
Does your child often forget to wear their braces? This patent offers a solution by embedding a device in their mouth that triggers an alarm until the braces are properly fitted. Using magnetic technology, the device detects the presence of metal in the mouth. While it might seem extreme to have an alarm system wired into your child’s mouth, at least their teeth will end up perfectly aligned.
8. Electrically Vibrating Soap
Patent Number: US 6802819
Referred to as the Personal Hygienic Massage Bar, this invention is a unique bar of soap equipped with an electro-mechanical vibrating system. Inside its casing, an electric motor rotates an off-center weight, creating vibrations. The housing also includes two parallel reed switches and is powered by two alkaline batteries.
7. Drink Device for Bar Jumping
Patent Number: US 5678617
I struggle to find a practical reason for creating or owning such a device. According to the patent: “This invention introduces a Jumping Drink Bar Device—a novelty item designed for installation in bars or counters. When a customer orders a specific drink, the bartender places a glass on a marked spot and secretly activates a hidden mechanism. The drink then appears to jump from a distant location on the bar, making one or more leaps before landing in the patron’s glass.”
6. Motorized Ice Cream Cone
Patent Number: US 5971829
The only question that comes to mind is “why?” This invention is described as “[a] novelty eating device designed to hold, rotate, and shape a portion of ice cream or similarly soft food while it’s being eaten. It consists of a handheld housing, a rotating cup to hold the ice cream or similar food, and a motorized mechanism inside the housing that spins the cup, allowing the contents to rotate against the user’s tongue.” It’s hard to imagine why someone wouldn’t just twist a regular ice cream cone while eating it.
5. Clock for Animals
Patent Number: US 5023850
This patent describes a clock or watch that measures time in animal years, such as dog years. “A novelty timekeeping device designed to track time at an animal’s rate, calculated by comparing the average lifespan of a specific animal to that of a human. For instance, the multiplier for dogs is seven, meaning one human year equals seven dog years.”
4. Automated Bed-Making Device
Patent Number: US 4441222
Tired of making your bed every morning? This invention eliminates the need! “An electrically powered device attached to a bed frame that automates bed-making. It uses a framework with multiple arms that move from the foot to the head of the bed via rotating wheels. Each arm features a roller with a helical rib to smooth out wrinkles in the bedding. A tie-down mechanism secures the covers at the foot of the bed and pivots to allow the arms to interleave during their return. A limit switch controls the device’s operation and movement range.”
3. Device for Childbirth Using Centrifugal Force
Patent Number: US 3216423
This patent is officially titled “APPARATUS FOR FACILITATING THE BIRTH OF A CHILD BY CENTRIFUGAL FORCE.” The description states: “This invention involves a device that employs centrifugal force to assist in childbirth, aiming to reduce stress on the mother.” Because, of course, being strapped to a spinning machine at high speeds would be far less stressful than natural childbirth. The patent further explains: “For women with well-developed muscles and consistent physical activity during pregnancy, as seen in more primitive societies, nature provides the necessary strength for a quick and normal delivery. However, this is not the case for civilized women, who often lack the muscle development required for childbirth.” One can only wonder what research supports such claims.
2. Innovative Swinging Mechanism
Patent Number: US 6368227
This patent outlines a method for swinging on a traditional swing suspended by two chains from a horizontal tree branch. The user creates side-to-side motion by alternately pulling on each chain. The patent states: “The user may even opt to emit a Tarzan-like yell while swinging in this manner, mimicking the experience of swinging on vines in a dense jungle.” It’s hard to see the practicality of such an invention.
1. Clothing Designed to Display Pets
Patent Number: US 5901666
This invention involves clothing equipped with attached tubes, allowing pets to run through them while the garment is worn. According to the patent: “A vest or belt is designed with integrated tubular passageways for pets, which wrap around the wearer’s body and end in pocket-like chambers for feeding or retrieving the pet. The outer walls of the tubes are transparent, enabling spectators to view the pet as it moves. Graphics or designs representing the pet’s habitat or a narrative are printed on the vest, blending with the passageways to create the illusion of burrows or tunnels.”
