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The saying "as American as mom and apple pie" has long evoked a sense of nostalgic purity, dating back to its introduction during World War Two. Every May, we honor mothers and their invaluable role in our lives. However, while most embody wisdom and kindness, some mothers in American history have earned a far darker reputation.
Though not all of these women were outright criminals, they certainly don’t fit the mold of ideal mothers. Their tales serve as cautionary examples of what it takes to miss out on the prestigious "Mother of the Year Award."
10. Alice Bishop (c. 1620–1648)
Photo credit: Wikimedia Commons
In the 17th century, colonial women faced immense hardships, tasked with grueling household duties from sunrise under the strict authority of their fathers or husbands. Adultery, particularly with Native Americans, was met with severe penalties. The early 1600s saw numerous executions of young mothers who resorted to infanticide to avoid such disgrace. Among these cases, Alice Bishop’s trial in Plymouth Colony stands out for its unique circumstances. Unlike others, she was not accused of adultery with anyone.
After her husband George passed away in 1644, Alice became a widow with two young children, Abigail and baby Martha. She remarried shortly after, adopting the surname Bishop, as brief mourning periods were customary. Two years later, she gave birth to her third daughter, Damaris. On July 22, 1648, a neighbor named Rachel visited and noticed Martha still asleep during the day. Abigail sent Rachel away to fetch buttermilk. Upon her return, Rachel found Alice despondent and discovered bloodstains leading to the attic, where Martha lay with her throat slit. Alice admitted to the crime but offered no explanation.
Nearly four centuries later, the motive behind Alice Bishop’s murder of Martha remains a mystery. Many believe she suffered from extreme postpartum depression. Donna A. Watkins, a Bishop descendant and author, suggests that Rachel’s critical remark about Martha’s daytime nap might have pushed the overburdened and weary Alice to her breaking point.
Historians confirm that Alice Bishop was executed at the Duxbury Fair in the fall of 1648, where she was publicly hanged for her crime.
9. Mary Ball Washington (1708–1789)
Mary Ball Washington, the mother of George Washington, played a crucial role in shaping his character as a single parent. After the death of her husband Augustine when George was just eleven, she faced financial struggles, losing much of her late husband’s estate to his sons from a prior marriage. Despite this, she ensured her family remained sheltered and instilled in her children the values of diligence and resilience. Her deep religious faith also provided a moral foundation for her children. However, as George grew older and began to forge his path, Mary became overly possessive, often causing him public embarrassment.
At fifteen, George expressed a desire to join the British navy, but Mary intervened and prevented him from doing so. This decision drew criticism from prominent figures of the time. Later, George moved to Mount Vernon, his late father’s estate, in his early twenties. When he planned to join General Edward Braddock’s campaign against the French in 1755, Mary rushed to Mount Vernon to stop him, forcing George to explain his delayed arrival to his superiors due to his mother’s interference.
George also faced financial strain because of his mother. According to his father’s will, Mary was supposed to transfer ownership of Ferry Farm to George when he turned 21. However, she refused to relinquish control and kept all profits from the property. Despite this, she frequently requested financial support from George, leaving him struggling to manage both her demands and his own expenses.
During the Revolutionary War, Mary found it difficult to cope with George’s absence, even though he had purchased a house for her in Fredericksburg for her later years. The pinnacle of George’s humiliation came in 1781 when he learned that Mary had petitioned the Virginia legislature, claiming indigence and requesting state assistance. This act deeply embarrassed the proud general, who was leading the nation’s fight for independence.
George frequently defended himself against accusations of neglecting his mother, despite her constant requests for financial support, even though she was wealthier than most at the time. Mary Ball Washington passed away from cancer in 1789. Even after her death, George often felt compelled to assert that he had been a devoted and caring son, countering any negative rumors.
8. Martha “Calamity” Jane Cannary (1852–1903)
Calamity Jane, the infamous sharpshooter and frontierswoman, was confirmed to have given birth to two children—a son and a daughter. While she reportedly made efforts to be a good mother, her nomadic and unconventional lifestyle made it nearly impossible. She took on various roles, including cook, dance-hall girl, ox-team driver, scout, wild west performer, and even smallpox nurse. However, her off-duty life was often marked by heavy drinking, brawling, and frequent jail stays, making it an unsuitable environment for raising children.
Newspapers reported that Calamity Jane gave birth to a son named “Little Calamity” in 1882 while staying with a rancher near Miles City, Montana. She was said to have showered the child with affection, but shortly after his birth, she began claiming he had died. This marked the end of Little Calamity’s story.
In 1887, Jane appeared in court in Cheyenne, Wyoming, facing charges of public drunkenness. She presented a doctor’s note stating she was pregnant. Four months later, her daughter Jessie was born, with Clinton Burke, a Texan, identified as the father. Though Jane stayed with Burke for a time, her restless nature soon took over. She was often seen wandering the West with her daughter in tow, frequently intoxicated. In 1893, she left Jessie alone at a restaurant in Castle City, Montana, while she was jailed 200 miles away for drunkenness. Later that year, when spotted with Jessie in Rawlings, Wyoming, a local reporter speculated the child might have been stolen, given Jane’s notorious reputation.
One of the most ironic stories about Jesse’s troubled childhood occurred in 1895 when Jane appealed to the Deadwood, South Dakota, community for funds to send her daughter to a convent school. The townspeople generously contributed, but Jane squandered the money the same night on a raucous, alcohol-fueled celebration with her friends. On a darker note, Jesse faced bullying and ridicule from other students at a school she briefly attended, all because of her mother’s notorious reputation.
When Jane passed away in 1903 in Terry, South Dakota, suffering from inflammatory bowel disease and pneumonia, she appeared exhausted and decades older than her 53 years. By then, Jesse had married, and the two were no longer in contact. This estrangement seemed to cloud Jesse’s memory. In the 1930s, she referred to Jane as her grandmother, and by the 1940s, she claimed Jane was her aunt. Regardless of Jesse’s personal feelings, Calamity Jane remained a legendary figure and a vibrant symbol of the Old West.
7. Kate “Ma” Barker (1873–1935)
Ma Barker and her sons, key members of the Barker-Karpis gang, became infamous for their reign of terror across the Midwest in the early 1930s. Unlike most mothers, Ma Barker didn’t prioritize education, jobs, or manners for her four sons. Instead, she raised them to excel in bank robberies, kidnappings, and murders. Their notoriety was further amplified by Hollywood and J. Edgar Hoover, cementing their place in American folklore.
The Barker family’s criminal exploits have inspired numerous TV shows and films, often with altered surnames. As early as 1940, Blanche Yurka portrayed “Ma Webster” in Queen of the Mob, a domineering matriarch leading her criminal brood. Other portrayals include “Ma Jarrett” in White Heat (1949), “Ma Gantry” in The Manhunter (1974), and “Mama Fratelli” in The Goonies (1985). Jean Harvey played Ma Barker three times in the 1950s, and Robert Stack’s Eliot Ness faced off against her in an episode of The Untouchables.
Shelley Winters played the lead in the 1970 cult film Bloody Mama, essentially revisiting her 1966 role as “Ma Parker,” a quirky adversary of Batman and ally of Catwoman on TV. The character later appeared in animated form on Cartoon Network’s Batman: The Brave and the Bold in 2009. Similarly, Disney’s DuckTales featured “Ma Beagle,” who tormented Huey, Dewey, and Louie.
Contrary to her infamous reputation, those who knew Kate Barker (also called Arizona or Arrie Barker) claimed she had no criminal tendencies. She merely accompanied her sons on their exploits. Historians view her as a passive figure, providing a sense of familial stability as the gang moved from place to place. Alvin Karpis, the gang’s true leader, emphasized in his memoirs that authorities never documented her with police photos or fingerprints. Harvey Bailey, a fellow bank robber, even described her as too simple-minded to organize a meal, let alone orchestrate criminal activities.
How did Kate Barker gain such a notorious image? Many blame J. Edgar Hoover. In 1935, FBI agents fatally shot Ma and her son Fred during a standoff in Ocklawaha, Florida. There was little evidence she participated in the shootout. Hoover later painted her as a mastermind, calling her “the most vicious, dangerous, and resourceful criminal brain of the last decade.” This narrative was cemented just five years later with the release of the first Barker-inspired film.
6. Eleanor Roosevelt (1884–1962)
Eleanor Roosevelt stands as one of the most influential women in American history. She served as First Lady of New York from 1929 to 1932 and as First Lady of the United States from 1933 to 1945. Later, she contributed to the United Nations Commission on Human Rights and JFK’s Presidential Commission on the Status of Women. Despite her remarkable achievements, she often admitted to struggling with motherhood. Historians widely acknowledge her shortcomings as a parent, attributing them in part to her own dysfunctional family background.
Eleanor Roosevelt was born into New York’s elite society as the niece of Teddy Roosevelt. However, she didn’t fit the mold of beauty and grace expected of her. Her mother, Anna Rebecca Hall Roosevelt, openly criticized her plain appearance, even calling her “Granny” due to her serious demeanor. After Anna’s death from diphtheria when Eleanor was eight, she was sent to live with her strict grandmother, Mary, in Tivoli, New York. The household included two unruly, drunken uncles, one of whom would shoot at neighbors. Due to safety concerns, Eleanor was eventually sent to a private finishing school in London.
After becoming engaged to Franklin Delano Roosevelt, a distant cousin, in 1903, Eleanor faced constant interference from her controlling mother-in-law, Sara Ann Delano. Sara disapproved of the marriage and, after the wedding, bought the couple a New York townhouse next to her own, complete with connecting doors for easy intrusion. Sara managed both households, dictating everything from furnishings to childcare, even telling Eleanor’s children, “Your mother only bore you; I am more your mother than your mother is.” She also pressured Eleanor to abandon her social work, despite her lack of involvement at home.
Some might argue Sara’s meddling benefited the children. Eleanor and Franklin had five children, but she struggled with motherhood, lacking positive role models. Her unconventional methods, like tying down thumbs to stop thumb-sucking or hanging a cradle out of a window for fresh air, reflected her discomfort. The death of her third son, Franklin Jr., at seven months further shattered her confidence. Eleanor once admitted, “It did not come naturally to me to understand little children or to enjoy them,” and acknowledged that her children were more Sara’s than hers.
In 1918, Eleanor discovered Franklin’s affair with her social secretary and his contemplation of divorce. Sara intervened, threatening to disinherit them if they separated. Eleanor complied but focused on her social work, which led to her activism and achievements, including advocating for civil rights and representing the U.S. at the United Nations. Despite her regrets about motherhood and bouts of depression, her grandchildren remembered her as a loving grandmother. Ultimately, her story ended on a positive note.
5. Ethel Marion Milne (1893–1953)
Ethel Marion Milne, a former vaudeville performer turned housewife from Grand Rapids, Minnesota, found herself pregnant for the third time in 1921. Her marriage to Frank Gumm was strained, as he showed more interest in younger men than in her. Ethel considered ending the pregnancy, but a medical student friend warned her of the dangers and illegality of abortion. Frances Ethel Gumm was born on June 10, 1922, the youngest of three daughters, into a household devoid of affection.
Ethel soon began living through her daughters, pushing them into performances as the Gumm Sisters when Frances was just two and a half. The family dynamic was toxic, and Frances later recalled feeling valued only when she sang. Frank’s infidelity worsened, prompting Ethel to relocate the family to Los Angeles. There, she aggressively promoted her daughters at various venues, including adult-oriented spots like the Cocoanut Grove nightclub. Ethel often threatened Frances with harm if she refused to perform, even when unwell. By age ten, Frances was being given pills—some to keep her awake, others to make her sleep.
Frances’s talent eclipsed her sisters’, and by 13, she was signed to MGM. The studio disliked her name, so they renamed her “Judy Garland,” borrowing “Garland” from a respected film critic and “Judy” from a popular song. Studio head Louis B. Mayer cruelly nicknamed her “my little hunchback” due to her spinal curvature. Judy was put on a restrictive diet of cottage cheese and chicken broth to manage her weight, while Ethel enjoyed the studio’s payments.
During the filming of The Wizard of Oz, Judy was encouraged to take amphetamines to endure long hours on set. By then, she was already addicted to both amphetamines and barbiturates. Judy also alleged she faced sexual harassment at MGM, but with her father deceased, she had no one to turn to except Ethel, who ignored her struggles and focused on the studio’s checks.
Judy later called her mother, who died in 1953, “the real Wicked Witch of the West.” The pill dependency Ethel instilled in her led to lifelong addiction, contributing to multiple failed marriages, financial troubles, and her eventual death in 1969. Despite her hardships, Judy’s daughters, Liza Minnelli and Lorna Luft, remember her as a loving mother, proving that the cycle of self-centeredness can indeed skip generations.
4. Joan Crawford (c. 1906–1977)
Joan Crawford is another cultural symbol of poor motherhood, often accused of adopting children for publicity, physically abusing them, and famously screaming, “…no wire hangers EV-EEER!” But how much of this narrative is accurate? How much of the infamous movie (or cult classic) Mommie Dearest reflects reality?
While many have seen the film Mommie Dearest, fewer have read Christina Crawford’s 1978 book, which inspired it. Additionally, many are unaware that Joan adopted two other children besides Christina and her brother Christopher. Twins Catherine and Cynthia, adopted in 1947, have publicly denied Christina’s claims, describing Joan as a loving mother and accusing their sister of fabricating her story. Both twins have since passed away but maintained their stance during their lifetimes.
Others have also disputed Christina’s account, including Joan’s first husband, Douglas Fairbanks Jr., and actress Myrna Loy, who knew the family well. Joan’s longtime secretary, Betty Barker, admitted Joan had flaws but denied any abuse occurred. Christina herself acknowledged that the movie exaggerated her book’s claims, calling it a fictionalized distortion in which she had no part. The infamous wire hanger scene, for instance, never happened.
Christina, however, has stood by her version of events, arguing that her younger sisters were too young to witness the abuse she endured. She claims the twins were only two when she was sent to boarding school and that their lack of memory doesn’t negate her experiences. She also accused others of turning a blind eye to Joan’s behavior out of fear. Helen Hayes, the legendary actress, supported Christina’s claims in her autobiography, stating Joan was harsh with her older children and that people avoided confronting her to protect the kids from her wrath.
Bette Davis, Joan Crawford’s longtime rival, had little praise for her. After Crawford’s death in 1977, Davis famously remarked, “You should never say bad things about the dead, only good. Joan Crawford is dead…good.” Ironically, Davis’s own daughter later authored a book, continuing the trend of Hollywood tell-alls.
3. Lenore Skenazy (1959–)
Columnist Lenore Skenazy sparked controversy in 2008 with her article in the now-defunct New York Sun, titled “Why I Let My 9-Year-Old Ride the Subway Alone.” This bold admission led to the creation of the Free-Range Kids movement. Skenazy believed her son, Izzy, was capable of navigating the subway alone and argued that modern children are unnecessarily shielded from independence. Her stance against overprotective parenting earned her the title “America’s Worst Mom.”
Critics labeled her as neglectful and even insane, with some wishing harm upon Izzy to prove her wrong. However, Skenazy also garnered support, sparking a nationwide debate that dominated news outlets, talk shows, and newspapers across the U.S. and internationally.
Skenazy leveraged the controversy to build a successful career. In 2009, she published Free-Range Kids, a best-selling book based on her blog. She initiated the first “Take Our Children to the Park & Leave Them There Day” in 2010 and hosted the reality show World’s Worst Mom in 2012. In 2017, she co-founded Let Grow, an organization promoting child independence through school partnerships. Skenazy’s influence grew globally, and in 2018, Utah passed the Free-Range Parenting bill, protecting parents who allow their children more freedom.
Despite ongoing debates, many still find it unusual to see young children traveling alone on public transit, particularly in large cities. Skenazy acknowledges that authorities have contacted her three times regarding Izzy’s solo journeys. The first two incidents occurred shortly after her controversial 2008 column, with police checking on Izzy’s safety. The third time, at Port Authority when Izzy was 15, officers suspected he might be a runaway. Skenazy expressed gratitude for these interventions, appreciating the police’s concern for vulnerable youth. Perhaps labeling her “America’s Worst Mom” is an exaggeration…
2. Marie Noe (1928–2016)
Marie Noe, a Philadelphia woman, led a disturbing life, suffocating eight of her ten infants between 1949 and 1968. The other two children died naturally, with all deaths initially attributed to SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome). Her husband, Arthur, believed her innocence, and authorities did not investigate further. Decades later, in 1998, Philadelphia magazine published “Cradle to Grave,” an article by Stephen Fried that questioned the Noes’ innocence. Fried interviewed the couple and spoke with detectives who quietly reopened the case.
Marie was interrogated the same day Fried’s article was published. During a 12-hour session, she confessed to smothering four of her babies but claimed uncertainty about the other four. Regarding her first victim, she said, “He was always crying. He couldn’t tell me what was bothering him. He just kept crying… I took my hand and pressed his face down into the pillow until he stopped moving.” Marie pleaded guilty to eight counts of second-degree murder, marking the largest maternal infanticide case in history. Despite this, she never served jail time and lived freely until her death in 2016.
Wait, what?
At 71, Marie was offered an unconventional plea deal: she would avoid prison if she allowed international experts to study her psyche to understand what drives women like her. This unprecedented agreement included 20 years of probation, with the first five under house arrest. Naturally, she accepted the offer, as rejecting it would have been foolish.
Although Marie agreed to extensive psychiatric evaluation, the study never progressed beyond diagnosing her with mixed-personality disorder. Her medical records also noted developmental issues and alcoholism. As the author of “Cradle to Grave” pointed out, Marie spent the next decade at home with her husband, watching TV—a routine she had maintained for years. She even violated her probation early by dining at a Denny’s.
Arthur Noe passed away in 2009, having defended his wife’s innocence for years. Marie died in a nursing home in 2016, the same year her firstborn would have turned 67 had she not smothered him as an infant.
1. Bette Davis (1908–1989)
Bette Davis’s daughter, Barbara “B.D.” Hyman, published her own exposé, My Mother’s Keeper, in 1985, while Davis was still alive. In the book, Hyman recounts a childhood marred by domestic violence, parental alcoholism, and emotional abuse. Davis was overseas recovering from a stroke and filming when the book was released. Upon her return, she was stunned by her daughter’s accusations. Similar to the fallout from Mommie Dearest, friends and family rallied to defend Davis, criticizing Hyman for the book’s poor timing.
In her book, Hyman depicted Gary Merrill, her stepfather and Davis’s fourth husband, as physically abusive. She also portrayed her mother as a self-centered alcoholic who staged fake suicide attempts to manipulate her children. Hyman alleged that two of Davis’s children were adopted solely to serve as companions. Davis institutionalized one of them, Margot, at age three due to brain damage and mental disabilities, where she remained for most of her life. Hyman further claimed that Davis removed her from school at eleven to work as her personal assistant.
Gary Merrill defended his ex-wife, though his statements were poorly articulated. He acknowledged some truth in Hyman’s claims but dismissed them as exaggerated. Merrill admitted to physical conflicts within the family, justifying them by citing excessive drinking and blaming Davis for initiating disputes. He shared this explanation in a 1985 People magazine interview, attempting to downplay the controversy. His efforts, however, were clumsy and unconvincing.
Bette Davis retaliated against her daughter’s betrayal posthumously in 1989 when her will was revealed. Barbara Davis and her two children were excluded from the inheritance. Surprisingly, Margot, Davis’s mentally disabled daughter, was also disinherited without explanation or provision for her care. A harsh final act indeed!
