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While most people meet their end in rather ordinary ways, history holds stories of a few unfortunate souls whose deaths stand out as more than just memorable. Though many have died heroically throughout time, this list focuses on those who passed away in ways that are laughable, ironic, or simply downright absurd.
10. Matthew Webb
Matthew Webb, a professional swimmer, gained international fame as the first person to successfully swim across the English Channel in 1875. After competing in numerous races and exhibitions across the UK and the USA, in 1882, Webb declared his intention to swim through the powerful rapids at the foot of Niagara Falls.
Those who labeled the challenge as suicidal were ultimately proven correct. On July 24, 1883, clad in the same red trunks he wore during his successful Channel swim, Matthew Webb leapt from the side of a small ferryboat, which he had rowed to the center of the river. Tragically, shortly after, he was pulled into a whirlpool, and his body was discovered four days later. His autopsy revealed that the immense pressure of the water had paralyzed him, preventing him from breathing or moving. Though he became a national hero for his swimming feats, his legacy is ultimately tied to his ill-fated final challenge, an attempt that proved far beyond his grasp.
9. Pausanias
The Spartans are notorious for their brutality, but their tactics and reasoning often raise questions. Best remembered for their desperate stand against the Persians at the Battle of Thermopylae, one particular Spartan general exemplifies their flawed thinking in a way that surpasses even that legendary battle.
Pausanias, who became regent general after his uncle King Leonidas's death in the battle, earned a reputation as a tyrant and was soon accused of conspiring with Persia against Greece. Despite being acquitted of treason twice, rumors continued to swirl, leading Spartan authorities to send forces to capture him. Believing he could outwit them, Pausanias took refuge in a temple of Athena, thinking the Spartans would respect the sacred ground and spare him. While they didn’t enter the temple, they instead sealed him inside. According to legend, he was only removed when he was on the brink of death from starvation. He died immediately upon release.
8. Gruffydd ap Llywelyn
Gruffydd ap Llywelyn wasn’t exactly dealt the best hand in life. Born as the illegitimate son of Llywelyn the Great and his mistress, Gruffydd should have been entitled to the same rights as any legitimate son under Welsh law. However, Llywelyn, seeking to forge an alliance with the English, agreed that his son would be disinherited in favor of any children he would have with his English wife. Gruffydd was subsequently placed under the custody of King John.
This was just the beginning of Gruffydd’s three imprisonments. In 1223, years after being freed from the English, Llywelyn grew concerned that Gruffydd would challenge the inheritance of his first legitimate son, Dafydd. As a result, Gruffydd was imprisoned once again, this time until 1234. His final imprisonment came at the hands of his own brother, Dafydd, who doubted his loyalty and locked him up, along with his son. By then, Gruffydd had clearly had enough. On Saint David’s Day in 1244, he tried to escape, using a rope made of sheets to climb out of his tower. Unsurprisingly, the rope snapped, sending him to his death.
7. Draco
Draco is perhaps the most infamous Greek lawmaker and ruler. Renowned for his harsh laws and even harsher punishments, where most offenses were punishable by death, Draco was known for his iron-fisted leadership. Despite his brutality, he seemed to have a considerable following. However, after his reign, the citizens of Athens exiled him. He spent the rest of his life on the island of Aegina.
Though responsible for countless executions, Draco’s own demise was strangely comical. As recorded by several Greek historians, Draco met his end around 600 BC in the theatre of Aegina. After delivering a speech, he was greeted with a standing ovation. In a gesture of appreciation, the audience threw hats and cloaks at him—an unusual but somewhat customary act in Ancient Greece. The sheer volume of clothing thrown upon him proved too much, and he suffocated under the pile.
6. Arthur Aston
Sir Arthur Aston was a Royalist general during the English Civil War. Soon after becoming Governor of Oxford, on September 19, 1644, Aston was unseated from his horse and suffered a broken leg. Gangrene set in, and amputation became necessary. The procedure was successful, and Aston continued his life with a wooden prosthetic.
After the execution of King Charles I in 1649, Aston found himself defending Drogheda (or Tredagh) with a mere 3,000 men against Cromwell’s army. The defense ultimately failed, and only about 30 men survived. In an ironic and brutal twist, Aston was beaten to death using his own wooden leg.
5. Heraclitus
The death of Greek philosopher Heraclitus holds the distinction of being one of the most revolting on this list. A prominent and influential thinker in ancient Greece, he shaped the philosophies of Plato and Aristotle. According to Diogenes Laertius, Heraclitus passed away in 745 BC under bizarre circumstances.
Heraclitus developed a condition known as dropsy, which causes extreme swelling due to fluid buildup. In an attempt to alleviate his symptoms, he believed that by staying in a hot environment, the excess water would evaporate. In a truly strange course of action, he buried himself in cow dung, hoping the heat would help. Unsurprisingly, this did not work. Laertius reports that Heraclitus was unable to remove the dung and eventually died as a result.
4. Clement Vallandigham
If ever there was an example of pure irony, it’s the death of Clement Vallandigham. In 1871, in Ohio, Vallandigham was defending Thomas McGehan, accused of murdering Thomas Myers in a barroom brawl the previous Christmas Eve. The two men had a known animosity toward each other.
The night after the prosecution made its argument, Vallandigham conducted an experiment with a pistol to determine the amount of residue left from a gunshot at point-blank range. He was also given Myers’s gun as evidence for examination. Vallandigham argued that, in the heat of the brawl, Myers had accidentally shot himself. During his demonstration in his hotel room, in front of a witness, Vallandigham put a pistol in his pocket as Myers had done, aimed it at himself, and pulled the trigger. What he didn’t realize, however, was that he had picked up his own gun, which still contained live bullets. Vallandigham accidentally shot and killed himself while attempting to prove that Myers had accidentally shot and killed himself.
3. Franz Reichelt
Confident like many on this list, Reichelt was an inventor and tailor who came up with the parachute suit.
In February of 1912, Reichelt decided to test the parachute suit by jumping off the Eiffel Tower. Though authorities had allowed the suit to be tested using a mannequin, Reichelt insisted on being the one to test it. Despite having police officers surrounding him, no one intervened. A cameraman was positioned on the first floor, while another stood on the ground, along with a small crowd gathered to watch. The test was a complete disaster. The suit failed to slow his fall or give him any form of flight, and there was nothing to prevent his fatal plunge.
2. Bobby Leach
Another classic man vs. Niagara Falls story, Bobby Leach was already a well-known stuntman when he decided to attempt going over the falls in a barrel in 1911. At 53, he aimed to become the second person—and the first man—to do so. The first was Annie Edson Taylor, who completed the feat in 1901 and strongly advised against anyone else following her lead.
To everyone’s surprise, ‘Old Bobby’ succeeded! Though he emerged with a broken jaw and two shattered kneecaps, he told reporters that he was proud to have achieved ‘the greatest ambition of his life.’ After a career full of death-defying stunts, you’d think Leach’s death would be equally dramatic. However, in 1926, while in New Zealand, he slipped on an orange peel, causing a broken leg that later became infected with gangrene. He died just days later. Hardly the wild, explosive end one might expect after such a thrilling life.
1. Sigurd the Mighty
The Viking age still holds many mysteries for historians, but the public image of the Vikings is that of fierce, brutal warriors forever charging into battle. The death of Sigurd the Mighty could only ever befall a Viking.
Sigurd, the Earl of Orkney, formed an alliance with Thorstein the Red and set out to conquer parts of Scotland. This likely sparked a feud with Maelbrigte, a local magnate in Moray. After a battle between their forces, Maelbrigte was killed, and Sigurd proudly displayed his enemy’s head, attaching it to his saddle. However, this gruesome trophy became his undoing. As Sigurd rode north, the head’s teeth scraped his leg, leading to a fatal infection from the wound. In an almost anticlimactic turn of events, Sigurd the Mighty died from that simple scratch.
