Buzz
Occasionally, authors grow weary of crafting the novels that brought them fame and decide to explore projects they are genuinely passionate about. A literary writer might experiment with fantasy, or a fantasy writer might try their hand at literary fiction. However, sometimes these experiments go beyond genre-switching, resulting in works that are utterly bizarre.
10. Why Pedophilia Isn’t as Bad as You Think - Piers Anthony
In 1987, a 15-year-old boy left his home to live with his favorite fantasy author, Piers Anthony. The teenager boarded a plane, located Anthony’s residence, and arrived at his doorstep with his belongings. Anthony warmly invited the young boy into his home.
This story gained attention on NPR’s This American Life and initially appeared to be a heartwarming tale from a child’s life. However, a crucial detail was omitted, which would have transformed it into something far more disturbing: Piers Anthony has an unsettling fascination with children.
While there’s no evidence of Anthony committing illegal acts in real life, his writings suggest troubling themes. Beyond his well-known Xanth series, he has authored numerous books that convey a controversial message: Sexual relationships with children are acceptable if they give consent.
For instance, his novel Tatham Mound includes an explicit sexual encounter involving a 10-year-old girl. Anthony defended this by stating, “He had learned enough to know that age was not the criterion; the will of the maiden was.”
It’s as though he includes a disclaimer, assuring readers, “Don’t be alarmed by the graphic depiction of intimacy with a girl ‘hardly 10 winters old’—she consented, so it’s perfectly fine.”
Another example is his book Firefly, which centers on a man standing trial for engaging in sexual activity with a five-year-old. The narrative includes a fervent defense speech from the accused’s lawyer.
The defense attorney acknowledges that his client engaged in sexual activity with a five-year-old but argues that he is “morally innocent” because “they were genuine lovers, with age being no obstacle.” He concludes by stating, “The law may deem him guilty, but the law can often be foolish.” The fictional jury agrees with this sentiment.
In reality, it seems the boy who visited Piers Anthony returned home unharmed and without any incident.
9. Queen Elizabeth Accuses Shakespeare of Flatulence - Mark Twain
While Mark Twain was crafting two future literary classics, he likely wrestled with these questions: Which work will shape my legacy? Which will stand the test of time? Will it be Huckleberry Finn, the tale of a young boy’s journey, or my short story “1601”?
If your school didn’t include it in the syllabus, “1601” is a tale about Queen Elizabeth’s quest to determine whether Shakespeare passed gas. Written as a diary entry from 1601, the story employs highly formal Elizabethan language and is possibly one of the most vulgar pieces of literature you’ll encounter.
The narrative begins with Queen Elizabeth, Walter Raleigh, Francis Bacon, Ben Jonson, and William Shakespeare gathered for tea. The tension rises when someone releases a fart, described in vivid detail as “producing an exceedingly mighty and distressing stench.”
The story then shifts into a whodunit as Queen Elizabeth investigates the source of the flatulence. She interrogates everyone, from Ben Jonson to William Shakespeare.
Ultimately, it’s revealed that Walter Raleigh was the culprit. However, he refused to admit it, feeling “too ashamed to claim such a feeble act in such a dignified gathering.” Once the mystery is solved, the story descends into a series of crude jokes.
8. ‘The White Man’s Burden’ - Rudyard Kipling
Rudyard Kipling is celebrated for The Jungle Book, a captivating tale of a boy raised in the wild, adapted into numerous films. However, many are unaware that the same author penned the controversial poem “The White Man’s Burden.”
Kipling’s poem gained immense popularity during his era. Composed in 1899 during the Philippines’ struggle for independence from the US, it highlights a lesser-known fact: the US colonization of the Philippines.
Kipling believed in the righteousness of dominating a distant Asian nation. He crafted “The White Man’s Burden” to persuade Americans against granting the Philippines its independence.
By today’s standards, the poem is deeply offensive. It describes nonwhite people as “newly captured, sullen beings, half devil and half child” and “those you improve.” It also condemns nonwhites for protesting against colonization, which it frames as white people bringing them “into the light.”
In modern times, the phrase “the white man’s burden” is synonymous with British imperialism and racial prejudice.
7. Why Cats Are Superior to Dogs - H.P. Lovecraft
H.P. Lovecraft remains a divisive figure. While celebrated for his groundbreaking works of cosmic horror, his lesser-known essays reveal troubling views on racial hierarchy, eugenics, and the concept of “inferior beings.”
Naturally, we’re referring to his essay on why cats surpass dogs. Lovecraft penned an unsolicited 10-page piece that denounced dogs and submitted it to a magazine titled Leaves. The article is utterly bizarre.
Lovecraft doesn’t merely argue that cats are more elegant or charming. He goes so far as to label dog enthusiasts as “unimaginative,” “content with mundane routines,” and adherents to “popular beliefs.”
He doesn’t stop there. Lovecraft boldly claims that dog lovers are responsible for the decline of civilization. He asserts that their “submission to mediocrity” is what destroyed classical civilization during the Dark Ages.
A significant portion of the essay contends that a society’s “values and biases can be measured by its preference for dogs or cats.” He even attributes the success of Egyptian pharaohs to their fondness for cats.
It’s no secret that Lovecraft harbored racist ideologies. Even in this essay about cats and dogs, he explicitly states that “Negroes” are not fully human. Yet, despite his racism, his disdain for dogs appears to surpass his hatred for any human.
6. Gay Harry Potter Fan Fiction - Cassandra Clare
Cassandra Clare’s The Mortal Instruments series has achieved tremendous success, with her books becoming bestsellers and being adapted into films, TV series, and more. However, her earlier works, particularly her homoerotic Harry Potter fan fiction, have not garnered the same level of recognition.
Clare began her writing career with fan fiction, creating a series titled The Draco Trilogy. This trilogy explores a narrative where Draco Malfoy joins forces with Harry Potter and his allies.
More notably, Draco is portrayed as stylish and alluring, often seen wearing leather pants. This depiction became so iconic in Harry Potter fan fiction that it spawned a trope known as “Draco in Leather Pants.”
As the story progresses, Draco and Harry grow increasingly close, with their relationship taking on a subtly homoerotic tone. Many readers have observed that their bond appears to transcend mere friendship.
It’s unusual to think that a renowned author began her career by crafting fan fiction about Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy harboring romantic feelings for each other. However, the situation becomes even more intriguing when considering that her mainstream works may echo similar themes. Some argue that her Mortal Instruments series was heavily influenced by her earlier Harry Potter fan fiction.
5. ‘Fart Proudly’ - Benjamin Franklin
Benjamin Franklin is widely celebrated as an inventor and a Founding Father, but his literary contributions are equally noteworthy. His renowned work, Poor Richard’s Almanack, stands as one of the most influential publications of its era, brimming with timeless wisdom that remains relevant and widely quoted to this day.
Surprisingly, one of his most intriguing essays, “Fart Proudly,” often goes unnoticed. In this bold piece, Franklin passionately argues in favor of flatulence, suggesting that societal disdain for it stems solely from its odor.
The essay culminates in a visionary plea for scientists and chemists of the modern age to develop a solution that transforms bodily gases into something pleasant, akin to fragrances, enabling individuals to “fart proudly” without embarrassment.
4. A Tale of Seven Naked Ladies by Dr. Seuss
Prior to becoming a beloved children’s author, Dr. Seuss struck an unconventional agreement with Random House. He insisted on a contractual provision permitting him to pen a book featuring seven nude sisters before transitioning to children’s literature.
Confident in the book’s potential success, Seuss aimed to captivate audiences with his risqué illustrations. This led to the creation of The Seven Lady Godivas.
The illustrations bore the unmistakable style of Seuss. His unclothed figures resembled the characters from his children’s books, albeit without their signature attire.
However, the book was a commercial failure. Seuss expressed regret, attributing the flop to his inability to depict the figures as alluringly as he had envisioned. This setback ultimately paved the way for his rise as the world’s most celebrated children’s author—ironically, because he couldn’t draw a sufficiently enticing image.
3. Zombie Necrophilia by George R.R. Martin
George R.R. Martin is known for his gritty and mature storytelling. Game of Thrones is rife with themes of incest, violence, and betrayal, making it challenging to surprise his audience. Yet, Meathouse Man manages to do just that.
Martin himself describes Meathouse Man as “the most disturbing, grim, and perverse story I’ve ever penned.” The narrative centers on a man exploiting a zombie outbreak to engage in necrophilia, living up to its unsettling reputation.
The tale delves into explicit, vivid depictions of the protagonist’s encounters with corpses, interspersed with his speculative reflections on whether the deceased derive any pleasure from the acts.
Martin has stated that he created Meathouse Man to gain Harlan Ellison’s approval. When Ellison challenged him to craft a tale of dark visions, Martin feared he couldn’t produce something sufficiently grim to impress the author of “I Have No Mouth, And I Must Scream.”
Determined to push boundaries, Martin wrote the most disturbing story he could conceive. Recently, Meathouse Man has seen renewed interest, with Jet City Comics transforming it into a graphic novel to complement the text with visual imagery.
2. Science Fiction Novel by Johnny Cash
Long before his rise to fame, Johnny Cash explored science fiction writing in 1953. He authored The Holografik Danser, a dystopian narrative envisioning a future where Russia dominates America.
Despite the United States being devastated by nuclear strikes, Cash’s narrative revolves around the entertainment sector. He highlights holographic performances transmitted via telephone lines and projected as holograms.
Cash’s science fiction endeavor never gained traction, and he failed to secure a publisher. This may have been due to his refusal to use conventional English. The entire manuscript was composed in a phonetic, grammar-free style of English that Cash believed would dominate future communication, rendering the story nearly incomprehensible.
Cash ultimately pursued his secondary ambition of becoming a music icon. However, his book was finally published 48 years later in 2001, after his daughter Rosanne Cash discovered the manuscript.
1. The Space Alien Sequel To 101 Dalmatians by Dodie Smith
Long before Disney adapted it into a film, 101 Dalmatians originated as a novel by Dodie Smith. She also authored a sequel, which diverged significantly from Disney’s interpretation.
Smith’s follow-up, titled The Starlight Barking, begins with an extraterrestrial plunging all humans and animals—except dogs—into a profound slumber. The alien, revealed to be the ruler of the Dog Star, orchestrates this event.
The alien’s plan is to freeze the planet, allowing the 101 dalmatians to flee Earth before humanity annihilates it in a nuclear conflict. This narrative, penned in the 1960s, reflects the era’s preoccupation with Cold War themes in science fiction.
Predictably, Disney chose not to adapt this unconventional tale into a movie.
