43 Timeless English Insults

Renowned as the greatest writer in the English language, William Shakespeare was also a genius at crafting sharp insults. In his works, a nervous servant informing Macbeth of an attack is scorned as a “cream-faced loon.” Oswald in King Lear isn’t merely a fool; he’s branded a “whoreson zed,” an “unnecessary letter.” Lear’s ungrateful daughter Goneril is called a “plague-sore,” an “embossed carbuncle in my corrupted blood.” And when Falstaff questions Mistress Quickly’s honesty in Henry IV: Part 1, he quips, “there’s no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune.” (It’s likely he didn’t mean the literal dried fruit.) But Shakespeare isn’t the only source of colorful language. Next time you’re in a heated debate or need a clever retort, try weaving one of these vintage insults into your conversation.

1. Bedswerver

A term for an adulterer. This seems to be another one of Shakespeare’s creative contributions that gained traction in Victorian-era slang.

2. Bobolyne

A Tudor-era term for a fool, created by the 15th-16th century poet John Skelton, who served as one of Henry VIII’s schoolteachers.

3. Cumberworld

Also known as a cumberground—a person so useless that their only purpose is to occupy space.

4. and 5. Dalcop and Harecop

Cop is an archaic term for the head, so a dalcop (literally meaning “dull-head”) refers to someone exceptionally unintelligent. Similarly, a harecop describes a “hare-brained” individual.

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6. Abydocomist

Abydos, an ancient Egyptian city, was said to have residents who, as per a 19th-century dictionary, “gained notoriety for crafting slanders and proudly boasting about them.” Whether factual or not, the term abydocomist originates from Abydos, describing a liar who takes pride in their deceit.

7. Dorbel

A dorbel refers not only to a simpleton but also to an overly meticulous, nit-picking teacher. The term traces back to Nicolas d’Orbellis, a French scholar known for supporting the often-mocked philosopher John Duns Scotus, whose followers were the original “dunces.”

8. Drate-Poke

An old dialect term from England for someone who mumbles or speaks unclearly.

9. Driggle-Draggle

A woman who is messy or unkempt in appearance.

10. Fopdoodle

A man who is trivial or lacking in sense.

11. Bespawler

The term bespawl refers to spitting or drooling. A bespawler is someone who slobbers excessively, often spitting while speaking.

12. Fustilugs

As per the Oxford English Dictionary, this word, describing “a woman of large or heavy build,” stems from fusty, implying something that has gone stale or spoiled.

13. Fustilarian

Another of Shakespeare’s brilliant insults, introduced in Henry IV, Part 2: “Away, you scullion! You rampallion! You fustilarian! I’ll tickle your catastrophe,” Falstaff declares. If not simply a variant of fustilugs, it likely refers to someone who pointlessly wastes time on trivial matters.

14. Gillie-Wet-Foot

An archaic Scottish term for a deceitful merchant or someone who accumulates debt and then absconds.

15. Gnashgab

An 18th-century term from northern England for someone who constantly grumbles or complains.

16. Dew-Beater

An 18th-century term for an oversized shoe, and by extension, a clumsy or uncoordinated individual.

17. Gobermouch

An old Irish term for a meddlesome individual who enjoys prying into others’ affairs.

18. Gowpenful-O’-Anything

A gowpen refers to the hollow created by cupping your hands, and a gowpenful-o’-anything is “a scornful term for someone who embodies a mix of all things ridiculous,” as defined by the English Dialect Dictionary.

19. Leasing-Monger

The term leasing is an archaic word for a lie or falsehood, so a leasing-maker refers to a liar.

20. Klazomaniac

Someone who can only communicate by raising their voice.

21. Lubberwort

In the 16th century, lubberwort referred to a mythical plant believed to induce laziness or dullness, eventually becoming a term for someone slow-witted and sluggish.

22. Muck-Spout

A regional term for someone who talks excessively and frequently uses profanity.

23. Mumblecrust

Originating from a recurring character in medieval farces, a mumblecrust describes a beggar without teeth.

24. Quisby

In Victorian-era English, doing quisby referred to avoiding work or idling. A quisby was someone who habitually engaged in such behavior.

25. Rakefire

A guest who lingers far beyond their welcome. Originally, it referred to someone who stayed so late that the embers in the fireplace needed raking to keep the fire alive.

26. Raggabrash

A messy or unkempt individual.

27. Roiderbanks

Someone who spends excessively or lives beyond their financial means.

28. Scobberlotcher

Likely stemming from scopperloit, an old dialect term for a break or time off, a scobberlotcher is someone who avoids hard work.

29. Saddle-Goose

Saddling geese is famously futile, so someone who attempts it—referred to as a saddle-goose—must be foolish.

30. Smell-Feast

A person who shows up uninvited to a gathering or meal, expecting to be served.

31. Smelfungus

When Laurence Sterne (author of The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy) encountered Scottish writer Tobias Smollett (author of The Adventures of Peregrine Pickle) in Italy in 1764, he was struck by Smollett’s harsh criticism of every place he visited. After Smollett published his Travels Through France and Italy in 1766, Sterne responded with his own Sentimental Journey Through France and Italy two years later. Sterne’s work, blending novel and travelogue, introduced a character named Smelfungus, inspired by Smollett, who was perpetually critical. The term soon became synonymous with anyone who ruins the mood by finding fault with everything they encounter.

32. Snoutband

A person who frequently interrupts discussions, often to contradict or correct others.

33. Sorner

In the 16th century, sorning referred to freeloading or sponging, making a sorner someone who ungratefully depends on others for their livelihood.

34. Stampcrab

Someone who is awkward and moves with heavy, clumsy steps.

35. Skelpie-Limmer

A mischievous child. Created by Scottish poet Robert Burns, derived from the Scots term skelpie, meaning “naughty” or “deserving discipline.”

36. Stymphalist

In Greek mythology, Hercules faced the Stymphalian birds—monstrous, man-eating creatures with metallic beaks and feathers, known for their foul, toxic droppings. A Stymphalist refers to someone with an equally repugnant odor.

37. Tallowcatch

Another of Shakespeare’s creative insults, aimed at the crude, womanizing knight Falstaff in Henry IV, Part 1. It likely stems from “tallow ketch,” meaning “a barrel of fat.”

38. Triptaker

A nitpicking, overly critical pedant.

39. Loiter-Sack

This 17th-century term describes a lazy, unproductive individual. Essentially, someone who appears to spend their entire day lounging in bed.

40. Wandought

A feeble and ineffective man. (Wandoughty historically referred to impotence. Enough said.)

41. Whiffle-Whaffle

Someone who is indecisive and wastes time, a true ditherer.

42. Yaldson

A term from the 15th century referring to “the son of a prostitute.”

43. Zoilist

Zoilus, a Greek grammarian, gained notoriety as one of the harshest critics of Homer, the author of The Iliad and The Odyssey. Thus, a zoilist is someone who is excessively critical and nitpicky.