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Spending quality time with someone you care about can be one of the most meaningful ways to offer support. Photo by FatCamera/Getty ImagesEveryone understands that chemotherapy is a difficult journey. But not everyone knows the best ways to assist a friend or family member fighting the relentless battle of cancer. You may not be able to cure the illness, but you can certainly help ease the pain, stress, and emotional challenges that come with it. Here are some of our top recommendations.
1. Offer to Help with Errands
Find out which errands need to be taken care of and offer to handle them for the patient and their caregiver. For instance, when Ian Sells, the founder of RebateKey, learned his friend had been diagnosed with cancer, he stepped in to take care of picking up medications. "Cancer patients often need a variety of medications depending on their chemo side effects," Sells shares via email. "Since refilling prescriptions only requires a short trip to the pharmacy, I decided to take on that responsibility." He also checks in with his friend every Monday at 9 a.m. to offer further assistance throughout the week. "Having a regular schedule helps create some routine, which can be really beneficial for him."
2. Gift Chemo-Friendly Clothing
Chemotherapy alters a person's body in ways they never expected. Consider suggesting or buying clothing that will make their chemo days more comfortable and manageable.
For instance, bulky chest ports are an essential part of a chemo patient's treatment, but regular clothing often doesn't accommodate them comfortably. "Healthwear" brand Care+Wear offers clothing designed to make life easier for chemotherapy patients. Their Oscar de la Renta chest port access hoodies allow patients to wear them comfortably while providing discreet access to the chest and port area during chemotherapy and other treatments, according to the website.
PICC line covers are another essential item for anyone with a semi-permanent IV. Care+Wear's founder created these covers after discovering that caregivers were being advised to cut up tube socks to cover the IV tubes.
Since chemotherapy often causes hair loss, soft and stylish head coverings are essential to keep the head warm and lift the spirits. Consider ones from Chemo Fashion Scarf or Headcovers Unlimited for the perfect fit!
3. Gather Support from Loved Ones
With the patient's consent, rally friends, family, and the community to get involved. Many people genuinely want to help but aren't sure where to start. Offer them concrete options. For instance, set up a Meal Train that includes details like allergies, food sensitivities, dates, and times. Or use a SignUp Genius to organize a "gift card drive," allowing each person to contribute a gift card for food or services. Small gestures like these go a long way in making someone feel cared for and supported.
Delivering meals is a long-standing tradition of support for those who are unwell. Using services like Meal Train ensures that meal deliveries are scheduled and organized. Photo by Oscar Wong/Getty Images4. Play Footsie
Here’s a simple yet meaningful gesture anyone can do! Grab a couple of pairs of thick, cozy socks—either wool or cotton—to keep those toes toasty during chemo. Extra credit if they’re fun and full of character! "If the socks are cute, the nursing staff can easily strike up a conversation with you," suggests Jennifer Boaro from Bellevue, Washington, who supported her husband through his treatments for acute lymphoblastic leukemia.
5. Tackle Some Household Chores
We all know those endless household tasks that never seem to end—well, they don’t stop just because someone is going through chemo. Offer to help with cleaning, mowing the lawn, cooking meals, walking the dog, babysitting, laundry, paying bills, or even taking out the trash. "Fatigue is one of the most common side effects of chemo, as the treatment disrupts the body's metabolic processes," explains Dr. Andrea Paul, a medical advisor for Illuminate Labs. "Offering to handle some of their physical chores can make a bigger impact than any gift or card."
6. Stock Them Up on Chemo-friendly Products
Chemotherapy can take a toll on everything from skin to appetite. Create a thoughtful gift basket filled with items known to provide relief. For instance, Tara Coyote, a best-selling author and cancer survivor of four years, suggests adding unscented, natural lotions to help combat dry skin. She advises avoiding scented lotions as chemo patients often develop a heightened sensitivity to smell. Also, include a variety of bland crackers, as they can help ease nausea, which is common during treatment. "Peppermint tea can also help soothe an upset stomach," she adds via email.
Personal trainer and breast cancer survivor Melissa Rasbach from Kennesaw, Georgia, shares that coconut water was a lifesaver for her during chemotherapy. "Plain water didn’t taste good to me, but coconut water was refreshing," she recalls. "The added benefits of coconut water made it even better." Don’t forget to add a couple of bottles to your care package—you never know what might work best for someone in need!
If you're not in the same area as the patient, consider sending a chemo care package from Rock the Treatment, which offers options for men, women, and children.
7. Accompany Them to Appointments
Ideally, everyone would have a dedicated caregiver to take them to appointments and handle the small but important details. However, some caregivers still need to work, and some patients may not have anyone to rely on. Step in and fill that role by offering to drive the patient to and from their appointments, and be sure to take notes on important details discussed during the visit.
"Patients often experience memory lapses during and after treatment, and the amount of information they receive can be overwhelming. Taking notes can help ensure they have access to the necessary details later," advises Dr. Elliana Rose from Audiology Research in an email. Additionally, offer to accompany them to follow-up appointments and scans, even after treatment has ended. "Cancer patients often feel anxious about these appointments, even years later. A supportive presence and someone to talk to can make a big difference," she adds.
8. Just Show Up
It might seem small, but often all cancer patients really need is someone to spend time with them. They might want to talk about their health or anything else to distract from their treatment. Or they may prefer silence. "Your friend may need a calm and steady presence to simply listen or just be there with them," says Helena Plater-Zyberk, co-founder and CEO of Supportiv. "You don’t have to start deep conversations or fill the silence. Just be available, and your friend will speak when they’re ready."
People are more likely to accept help when you offer something specific. "For example, saying, 'I can bring you soup this week' instead of, 'Let me know if you need anything,' is much more likely to get a positive response," says Tara Coyote, author and former cancer patient. "It’s difficult for those battling cancer to ask for help, so being direct with your offer increases the chances they’ll take you up on it."
