Buzz
As I’ve often shared, Sarah and I are dedicated to achieving financial independence as soon as possible. For us, financial independence means that earning money through work becomes entirely optional, giving us the freedom to pursue career choices based solely on our abilities and personal happiness. Given the financial challenges we faced in our twenties, we’re now aiming to reach this goal by our mid-forties—roughly ten years from now, assuming everything goes as planned.
This post was originally published on The Simple Dollar.
The greatest obstacle in pursuing such a monumental goal is that achieving it requires a fundamental shift in mindset. This lofty objective must reshape the way you view the world and the choices you make on a daily basis.
Making this shift can be tough. By committing to save a significant portion of our household income each year, we’re opting for a lifestyle that’s likely very different from how we were brought up and from how the majority of Americans live.
You must shift your thinking a bit – and the only way to achieve that is by developing a new mindset.
In recent years, I've dedicated a great deal of my time to shaping that mindset – initially without much thought, but eventually with full intention. I've devoured countless books on personal development, finance, and psychology. Ultimately, I’ve discovered a few key practices that truly help in fostering that kind of mindset.
What Do You Desire Most from Your Life?
Every single day, I set aside a few moments to reflect on what I truly want from my life. I’m not just referring to today, tomorrow, or the upcoming weekend. I think about questions like what my children will share with my grandchildren about me, what might be said in my eulogy, or the total number of people I’ve had a positive impact on during my lifetime.
These are profound and significant considerations, and they can be difficult to fully grasp. Our future is often clouded by uncertainty. We rarely know exactly what tomorrow will bring, let alone what life will look like in five or twenty years.
What we can focus on are principles. When someone sums up your life in one sentence, what will they say about you? When you leave this world, will you have made a positive difference in many lives? How will you make that happen?
When you focus on the short term – today, tomorrow, this weekend – it becomes much easier to justify purchases. This weekend could be so much better if I bought this item or took that trip.
When you shift your focus to the long term – your larger life goals – those expenses start to feel far less significant. Does buying a new dress for the party this weekend really matter? What truly matters is the connections you make there – and if those connections don’t matter, why go at all?
How Do Your Daily Decisions Contribute to That Life?
But I’m still human. When I’m in the mindset of reflecting on the bigger patterns in my life, I can’t help but connect them to those short-term concerns – today, tomorrow, this weekend. At times, they can seem disconnected.
What I aim to do is reflect on recent events and consider my upcoming actions through the lens of my bigger life ideals. For instance, I'm heading to the store tomorrow. How will the choices I make there align with my larger life goals?
I frequently walk through past and future interactions and purchasing decisions while keeping those big-picture goals in mind. I'll think about a recent social interaction. Did I truly foster a meaningful relationship there? If not, what held me back? I’ll also reflect on an upcoming trip to the store. What kinds of foods should I buy to support my long-term goals? (Healthy options, ideally at an affordable price.) Should I waste money on trivial items? (No.)
Many people do these types of mental reviews – I know I’ve been doing it since I was young. The key difference is that I try to guide these reflections with my lifelong objectives in mind. I don’t focus on temporary or short-term pleasures during these moments. My sole focus is the long-term and how each situation I evaluate contributes to my larger goals in life.
Of course, I don’t always make decisions purely based on long-term thinking, but by reflecting on these situations, I find that I make far more decisions and navigate many more interactions with a long-term perspective than I did before.
Learn How to Distinguish Between Needs and Wants
The overwhelming majority of things in our lives are wants. Because we're accustomed to a life of abundance, we’ve come to mistake many of our desires for needs, simply because we’re so used to having our wants met.
When you pause and reflect on how many of our wants are satisfied on a daily basis, it’s hard not to feel immensely fortunate.
I appreciate how Jacob Lund Fisker articulates this idea in his book Early Retirement Extreme, which I recently reviewed. Here's his take on the matter:
Take, for example, the concept of shelter. The options here might look something like this:
1. Sleeping under the open sky.
2. Sleeping under a tarp, bascha, or hootchie shelter.
3. Residing in a tent.
4. Couch surfing between different places.
5. Living in a small shack or rustic cabin.
6. Residing in a ship's cabin or a truck's sleeper.
7. Residing in a car or on a boat.
8. Living in a mobile home or RV.
9. Sharing a room with others.
10. Enjoying the privacy of your own room.
11. Co-habiting an apartment with others.
12. Owning your own apartment.
13. Co-habiting a house with others.
14. …
On this spectrum, there is no clear distinction between when something shifts from being a need to a want. Each step represents a slight increase in cost and a small change in lifestyle, with no concrete indicator of what the absolute minimum is, other than simply having a place to sleep.
I know family members and friends who have lived at levels three and four on this list, and they are fully functional and wonderful individuals. As for me, I find myself somewhere closer to level seventeen. The main difference between us is simply the satisfaction of many additional wants.
Now, I'm not suggesting that everyone should live in tents like recluses. That's not the idea. The idea is that when you take a moment to reflect on your life from this angle, you start to realize the immense number of wants that are fulfilled every single day and how incredibly rich and fulfilling our lives truly are.
I have so much. I live in a beautiful, spacious house, shared only with the people I love deeply. Why would I want anything more? I own a dresser full of clothes that fit perfectly and look great on me. Why would I need more? I have more board games than I’ll ever get the chance to play to the point of boredom or repetition. The same could be said about books. I enjoy amazing meals multiple times a day.
My life is amazing. Why do I feel the need to keep spending money on more and more and more wants?
Take some time each day to reflect on the many things in your life that satisfy wants. Make lists, similar to the housing options list. Think about where you personally draw the line between "need" and "want" and consider where you stand. You have so much already.
Whenever I reflect on this, I realize just how much money I spend on unnecessary wants that don’t truly add value to my life. If I spend money, it should either meet a basic need, benefit someone I care about, or align with a core value in my life. If I’m not doing any of those, the expenditure feels rather hollow.
Distinguish Your Desires from Those of Others
One of the most effective strategies that advertisers and marketers employ is blurring the lines between what we need and what we want. They tap into our social pressures, the quest for self-fulfillment, the need for love and affection, and many other emotions, using them to convince us that something is a need – or at least much closer to it than we might realize. They try to shape our desires to align with what they want. This manipulation isn't limited to ads; it also happens in "news" stories, product placements in TV shows, and countless other avenues.
In a less intrusive way, the people around us do the same thing. When we witness others experiencing pride or happiness, it’s a natural human impulse to want to feel the same way. When we identify what has caused those emotions, it’s also natural to desire whatever triggered them. We want to "keep up" with them. We want to feel as good as they do. We might even feel the urge to "outdo" them in some way.
The result of both of these influences is a shift in our own desires. We may suddenly yearn for something we hadn't considered before. A minor craving might grow into a much stronger desire. An entirely nonexistent wish can now become something you can’t live without or must experience.
There are many ways to handle this, and I’ll mention a few more strategies later, but one highly effective method is to simply reflect on your current strong "wants" and ask yourself why you desire them. Think about the one or two things you crave the most right now and consider the reason behind these desires. Then dig deeper – what about that item do you not want? Is it the price? A particular feature of the item?
The more you practice this, the more you become aligned with your own personal desires, distinct from the influences of others. Often, when you make this distinction, your list of wants shrinks, meaning you’re less likely to waste money and time on things that don’t hold deep significance for you. This also leads to greater clarity, ensuring that the things you do choose to invest in carry more meaningful value for you.
Investigate All of Your Purchases
Before making any substantial purchase – and by "substantial," I mean anything over $20 – it’s highly beneficial to spend some time researching the product in advance.
Regardless of the item, I always strive to learn as much as I can about the product I’m considering, as well as any noteworthy competitors. I seek out multiple comparative reviews that offer side-by-side comparisons of various options and thoroughly test them. Once I’ve narrowed it down to one, two, or maybe three viable options, I dedicate time to finding the best price, both online and in stores.
Of course, this can turn into a time-consuming rabbit hole. To manage this, I break it up into several shorter sessions. One session, I’ll find and read comparative reviews. In another session, I’ll gather more reviews. Between sessions, I’ll reflect on exactly what I want from the item. I might spend a session or two searching for the best deals, even using price-tracking tools like CamelCamelCamel to monitor the price changes.
Why? When I spend my money, I want to ensure it’s going toward something truly worthwhile. I want something that will serve a purpose, something I will actually use. I want something that will stand the test of time. I want an item that will deliver a top-notch experience for the price I pay.
I even encourage researching smaller, routine purchases. It’s valuable to spend some time reading resources like Consumer Reports to discover their "best buy" recommendations for everyday items – from paper towels to garbage bags and everything in between.
This approach guarantees that when I spend money on items that aren’t impulsive buys, I’m getting quality products at a fair price. And this should feel like second nature.
Take Your Time and Exercise Patience
It’s incredibly easy to become impatient in today’s fast-paced world. With information at our fingertips, it’s frustrating when we don’t get the answers we seek instantly. It’s disheartening when the changes we desire don’t happen as quickly as we hope.
Financial independence requires a mindset that’s almost entirely the opposite of the typical approach. It’s centered on the long-term. It’s about exercising patience, taking your time, and being willing to steadily work toward something significant that truly matters, rather than rushing toward something small that’s less important.
There are countless strategies you can use to nurture your patience. Active listening is one of them. Taking notes is another (and I’ll touch on that again shortly). Slowing yourself down intentionally is also an effective approach. Different methods seem to work for different individuals.
Ultimately, your focus should be on doing things well more than rushing through them quickly. While that’s not always possible, particularly in professional settings, you should aim to prioritize this in every aspect of your life, whenever the opportunity arises.
For instance, in conversations, instead of quickly moving from one point to the next, take the time to truly listen to the other person and respond thoughtfully to what they’re saying, instead of just pushing your own ideas forward. It may take longer, but it leads to better conversations and deeper connections.
When fixing a toilet, make sure everything is properly connected and thoroughly cleaned. It might take more time, but the repair will last much longer, and your bathroom will look much better in the end.
When you’re washing the dishes, take the time to load the dishwasher correctly. It may take a bit longer, but the dishes will come out cleaner, and you’ll save time later by avoiding the need to reload the dishwasher.
Practicing patience in the smaller, everyday tasks like this helps to gradually build patience in other aspects of life. Like the other steps in this article, it’s not an instant change, but every small move toward being more patient makes the journey to financial independence a little easier.
Educate Yourself Every Day
Set aside at least a small portion of time each day to dive deeper into learning something new about the world, beyond a tweet or a brief news article. This practice offers several benefits.
First, it teaches you something new about the world. That, in itself, is valuable. No matter the topic, it enhances your understanding of the world around you.
Second, it provides you with material to draw upon when you're trying to grasp other topics. Our world is so interconnected. The more you understand different areas of life, the easier it is to comprehend other things as they come your way. You’ll be able to make sense of things much more quickly.
Third, it challenges you to think. Understanding a new concept requires you to engage your mind in a powerful way. Your mind is similar to a muscle: the more you use it, the stronger it becomes. Learning something new is like a workout for your brain, strengthening it for future learning. The practice of learning itself makes it easier to absorb more knowledge.
Fourth, it can create new opportunities for earning money. When you acquire a new skill or enhance your proficiency in a certain area, you're more likely to capitalize on that expertise. Even if it doesn’t lead directly to new income, it can help you avoid the costs of hiring specialists.
Finally, it can open up new areas of personal interest. Things that once seemed dull can become fascinating as you learn more. Personally, I've developed genuine interest in many subjects I would have dismissed in the past.
For myself, I typically spend some time each day reading an article or a section of a book that either offers factual information on something I’m not familiar with (but want to learn) or provides a different perspective on a topic than what I usually encounter. As I read, I take notes because I've found that I remember things much better when I write them down by hand.
I make an effort to set aside time at least a few times a week to learn something new. Whether it’s figuring out how to repair something, installing a level shelf, or picking up a new musical instrument, I embrace the opportunity to expand my skill set.
This habit enriches my life in many ways. I find myself more inclined to handle tasks independently. I’m more eager to explore the world around me. I’m more open to stepping outside my comfort zone. All of these actions bring me closer to financial independence.
Embrace the Value of Life's Free Offerings
For me, this practice developed naturally from some of the other habits on this list, especially when I began making it a point to learn new things and skills every day. It also grew from my efforts to distinguish between needs and wants, realizing how much abundance already exists in my life.
The warmth of the sun on my neck and the coolness of the breeze cost me nothing, yet they provide incredible value to my life.
Exploring the woods and discovering fascinating finds like an ancient graveyard, a forgotten house, or a tranquil pond comes at no cost, yet it offers priceless experiences.
Engaging in a series of bodyweight exercises and feeling the surge of endorphins throughout my system costs nothing, but it leaves me feeling energized and refreshed.
Meditating or praying, losing myself in the power of the present moment, requires no financial investment but brings immense mental peace and clarity.
I can easily grab an old board game off my shelf and enjoy it, or pick up a book to read. Borrowing a book from the library is another free and fulfilling way to pass the time.
Starting a collection of rocks I've discovered, birds I've observed, geocaches I've found, or mushrooms I've spotted comes at no cost but fills my life with wonder and curiosity.
It costs me nothing to kiss my wife, hold my youngest son, or hear my daughter laugh that unique laugh of hers that always fills me with warmth.
The more I immerse myself in these experiences, the more I discover the beauty, depth, and joy they hold and how much they contribute to my life.
It makes me wonder why I spend money on so many things, which in turn has helped me spend much less. Unsurprisingly, this shift has led me to achieve many of my financial goals.
Foster Strengthening Relationships
When reflecting on the other points in this article, ask yourself: do the people around you share similar thoughts and actions?
Do the people in your life truly listen when you talk? Do they invest their time in learning new things? Are they thoughtful about their spending habits? Do they enjoy activities that don't cost money, whether with you or on their own?
People like this already embody the core elements of a mindset geared toward financial independence. You can see it clearly in their behavior.
If you're looking to develop a similar mindset, these are the kinds of people you should spend your time with and foster deeper connections with.
Why? The people you spend time with have a big influence on you. Their habits, interests, and quirks naturally weave into your own life. If a friend dedicates a lot of time to a particular hobby, you'll likely become more aware of it. If a friend follows certain daily routines, you'll likely start to find those routines appealing and even adopt them.
Take time to assess the people in your life and determine if their lives are aligned with financial independence and personal growth. When you come across people who are living this way, invest extra effort into building a stronger relationship with them.
By doing so, you'll attract friends who genuinely listen, friends who won’t push you to spend money on unnecessary things all the time, and friends who often offer valuable wisdom on a variety of subjects. Their behavior will influence yours as well.
Concluding Thoughts
Financial independence is most effective when it's not something you keep at arm’s length in your life. Rather, it should be seamlessly integrated into every aspect of what you do, influencing your daily choices, even in situations that don’t directly involve money.
It’s not an instant switch, though. It’s a gradual transformation. No one should cut off all their friends, completely change all their hobbies, or suddenly rearrange their time management—that’s not a healthy approach.
Instead, incorporate these steps slowly into your daily routine. Bookmark this page (or save this email) and review it regularly. When the idea pops into your mind, try adopting some of these practices. Practice patience before making a purchase. Learn something new today… and again tomorrow. Reach out to a friend who exhibits strong financial independence traits and invite them over for dinner. Take a walk in nature and appreciate the world around you.
Each of these steps builds upon the others, gradually shifting your perspective on the world around you.
Images courtesy of Klearchos Kapoutsis, Sebastiaan ter Burg, Polycart, Gareth Williams, Daniel Oines, Karoly Czifra, Jesslee Cuizon and Sakeeb Sabakka.
