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You may feel shy or lack a natural charm, but this isn't permanent. Social abilities are skills that anyone can acquire and refine. Begin practicing being more outgoing when there's little at stake.
As we’ve mentioned before, shyness is simply a habit. With enough practice, you can overcome this habit. One effective method is to challenge yourself to be more outgoing, particularly in casual environments, as Stefano Ganddini advises on College Info Geek:
Start by engaging in low-stakes situations, where you can pretend to be confident and social without much risk. For instance, initiate a short chat with a cashier or a waiter, asking how their day is going or giving them a genuine compliment. The conversations don’t have to be long; the goal is just to get comfortable speaking up.
This approach is beneficial because it allows you to ease into social interactions without high pressure, giving you a chance to fine-tune your social skills.
I tend to do this from time to time without giving it much thought. For instance, I've always struggled with giving compliments. I'd say something like, 'I love your shoes,' they’d respond with 'thanks,' and then... silence. Since I’m not naturally socially skilled, I’d often fall into that awkward moment. However, compliments are kind, so I wanted to improve. I started practicing by complimenting strangers, like a fellow shopper at the grocery store. Or, as Ganddini recommends, I’d compliment a cashier or a server. Practicing doesn’t mean the compliment isn’t heartfelt, but the reduced pressure allows me to get more comfortable doing it. The same method could be useful for other social skills.
You can explore more of Ganddini’s insights by following the link below.
Photo by Bowy Gavid Bowie Chan.
