Buzz
Joining the military is a monumental life choice. In fact, it might be one of the most significant decisions you'll ever make. While marriage has its risks, enlisting in the Army could place you in a war zone in a matter of months. By signing the enlistment papers, you’re surrendering not just your life, but your rights and freedoms as well. In this article, we’ll focus on the United States Army, one of the military's most demanding branches.
You've passed your ASVAB (Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery), aced the medical exam, and survived the dreaded piss test (especially tough for those who enjoy a certain herb). But what’s next? Recruiters are paid well for each recruit they bring in, and some are willing to do or say almost anything to get you to sign. But what's the reality behind all of this?
10. Initial Processing
Let's talk practicality for a moment—when you show up for basic training, leave your favorite sneakers and Gameboy at home. Recruiters insist you pack light, and anything that doesn't meet regulations will be taken from you temporarily. It’s a bit like being booked into jail or prison. For example, no, you won't be bringing your grandfather’s World War II revolver along. Non-religious books are also prohibited, and you'll have to use the Army's official stationery to communicate with anyone outside. Essentially, it’s a case of just the essentials: underwear, socks, running shoes, and the clothes on your back.
At a single Army fort, hundreds of recruits are processed daily. This grueling phase usually lasts a week, during which you'll endure temporary housing, eat dreadful cheese sandwiches with cafeteria milk, and spend what feels like endless hours signing paperwork. After that, they shave your head, dress you in camo (or A.C.U. for Advanced Combat Uniform), and jab you with a series of needles for various inoculations. You’ve officially become property of the Army. Processing is the most exhausting and soul-crushing part of basic training, and you’ll be longing for the day you're assigned to a platoon. It’s essentially a limbo period where they prepare you to look like a soldier, but not necessarily be one yet.
9. Welcome to Basic
Once you’re finally placed into your platoon, your assigned drill sergeants will give you a cold, hard introduction to what you've gotten yourself into. From day one, expect endless push-ups and running. After bouncing around from one temporary bed to the next during processing, having an actual bed to call your own will feel like a luxury. As soon as you're introduced to your barracks, you'll be assigned to clean it—though most recruits struggle during the first few weeks trying to polish the floors with an ancient wax buffer. The first few days will be full of 'smoking' (punishments for small offenses), as the drill sergeants teach you how to think, act, and speak like a private. They'll throw obstacle courses, rank drills, and weapons practice at you, constantly testing what you've learned from the Basic Training Soldier’s Handbook. All the while, the drill sergeants will be keeping a sharp eye on who excels and who falters.
8. Squad Leaders, Weaklings, and Recyclables
Drill sergeants already know who is strong and who isn’t, but in the Army, your fellow squad members will decide who leads. A squad is a small, specialized group within a platoon, typically made up of a dozen soldiers. Squad leaders don’t have direct authority but serve as intermediaries between the drill sergeants and the rest of the squad. Every basic training cycle has at least one recruit who is a total screw-up, known as the 'Gomer Pyle.' Additionally, some recruits who fail a training cycle are sent back for another round, known as 'recycles.' If you fail, you’ll have to repeat the whole training cycle. That’s right, you go through it all over again.
7. Gun Day
You’ll be handed your rifle right away, and while it's exciting to have it in your hands, you won't actually fire it for several weeks. It’s a frustrating yet essential part of your training. Like a puppy being housebroken, you need to learn to never let your weapon out of your sight. Gradually, you'll be taught how the rifle functions, with repeated practice in disassembling and reassembling it. Eventually, you’ll hit the range almost every day. To pass, you need to make at least 23-29 hits out of 40 shots to earn marksman, 30-35 for sharpshooter, and 36-40 for expert marksman.
6. The Grub
The food isn’t terrible. The U.S. government wants you in top condition, so they make sure you’re well-nourished. In fact, if you intentionally harm yourself, you’ll be charged with destroying government property. That said, they do feed you properly.
Breakfast is a big deal at nearly every base I’ve been stationed at. In fact, most bases serve two types of breakfast: the 'Yankee' breakfast, which includes eggs, bacon, English muffins, and sometimes an omelet station (yes, even in basic), and the 'Southern' breakfast with biscuits, gravy, and grits. America is vast, and we don’t all eat the same thing in the morning.
For lunch, you’re usually out in the field during training exercises, and they’ll either set up a tent to serve chicken fried steak or spaghetti with greasy ground beef, or they’ll toss you M.R.E.s (Meals Ready to Eat)—and I mean literally throw them at you, sometimes smacking you in the face with a bag. After hours of exhausting work, everything looks like a gourmet meal. The M.R.E.s come in various flavors, so it’s a fun experience to sit in the dirt, trade and haggle over different entrees or cookie flavors with your fellow soldiers.
Dinner is always hearty—think pot roast, pasta, or even steak. The downside is that there’s really no room for vegetarians or vegans in the military. While the food itself is decent, the catch is you only have about two minutes to shove it down before the drill sergeants start clearing the tables for the next batch of privates. And trust me, you better eat fast or you’ll go hungry.
5. Barracks Life
Most recruits are teens who’ve never been away from home, and many come from tight-knit communities. The sudden exposure to such a wide range of personalities can be a huge shock to the system. You’ll always have a few recruits who won’t bathe in the group showers (think high school football showers, not a private spa) because of insecurities. They’ll end up smelling awful after just a few days of intense physical activity, covered in their own sweat and grime. More often than not, their fellow soldiers have to force them to shower, which can be a traumatizing experience. I remember one guy who went two weeks without a shower, until he was scrubbed down with Pine-Sol under the watchful eyes of the drill sergeants. After that, he never skipped a shower again.
Some recruits are home-schooled or grew up in sheltered environments, making basic training their first real exposure to social life. It’s a huge shock, and sometimes, it can be traumatizing. It's a true sociological spectacle. Some recruits completely lose it, having mental breakdowns, while others realize they’re not as 'cool' or 'tough' as they thought. Basic training challenges your mind and soul just as much as it tests your body. It forces you to realize how bizarre humanity can be, but it also fosters a unique sense of camaraderie. Everyone bonds over the shared experience—there’s a certain 'we’re all in this hell together' feeling.
4. Running
Running plays a crucial role in military life. In basic training, you're up at 0435 hours, with a 0500 start time for running. The running regimen is divided into three groups: Group A, the elite, capable of completing a two-mile run in under fifteen minutes; Group B, the average runners who still need work; and Group C, the recruits who clearly should have done more prep before enlisting. A recruiter likely guided them through the initial tests just for the bonus. From day one, you’ll be assigned to one of these groups.
Here’s a little anecdote: At Fort Leonard Wood, known among us as 'Lost in the Woods', my drill sergeant, seeing I was in Group A, would let me indulge in a slice of key lime pie—under the condition I ate it in front of the Group C runners. Looking back, it was both amusing and cruel.
3. Graduation
You made it! Completing basic training is one of the most rewarding accomplishments you’ll ever experience. It’s comparable to the birth of a child or landing your dream job. You are no longer a civilian; you’ve transformed into a soldier. Over the weeks of rigorous training, you’ve learned not just to survive, but to function effectively as a soldier. No longer the clueless mess you once were, you now take care of yourself, maintain your surroundings, and most crucially, you can defend yourself.
Graduation represents the final connection with those who have stood by you through the toughest moments. In the military, we refer to fellow soldiers as 'Battles.' I remain in touch with my Battles, checking in with them regularly as they do with me. Every so often, I’ll receive a message saying, 'What’s good, Battle?' reminding me that I’ve been part of something extraordinary and accomplished something many cannot. I’m filled with pride for my service, and I hope to offer those who couldn’t or didn’t serve a glimpse into the intense yet rewarding experience I went through over the span of almost three months. Over and out.
If you’re considering a career with the U.S. Army, visit Go Army for more details.
2. Life Beyond the Barracks
When you begin your processing, all your civilian documents are taken, leaving you with only a military I.D. and a debit card for the post exchange where you can buy things like soap and stationery. Even if you manage to escape the barracks, you will have no I.D. and you’ll be trapped within a heavily protected, first-world military base. You'll quickly realize that you're no action hero like Jason Bourne.
You're also deprived of all communication devices. No phones, no tablets, absolutely nothing. Let me stress this once more: Nothing! No emails, no digital communication. Everything operates in an old-fashioned, analog manner. You're allowed to write letters by hand on army-approved paper, and you are granted only three phone calls throughout your training. The first call is to reassure your family that you're safe and provide them with your mailing address. The second call serves as a mental break—a soul reset, allowing you to hear the voice of a loved one. The last call is meant to announce your graduation and success.
Regarding both local and international news, each base publishes its own heavily censored weekly paper, which everyone fights to get just to read the comics at the back. You are deliberately disconnected from the world, as the outside world is seen as a distraction. Your sole focus should be on your training. It’s as simple as that.
1. Wall Lockers and Contraband
In basic training, everything you own is stored in something called a 'wall locker.' These lockers are regularly inspected, and just like your uniform, they must be kept in perfect order. A typical punishment for an entire platoon or company would involve having their wall lockers wrecked beyond recognition, followed by the task of cleaning and reorganizing them to meet the standard again. This makes hiding contraband quite a challenge. But contraband in basic isn’t what you might expect. I had my mother hide candy bars inside new packages of socks and underwear she sent me. A Snickers bar could sell for up to $20—it became a luxury item in the middle of all the chaos. Some people even resorted to drinking Listerine (now banned) or hand sanitizer to get a buzz. Basic training can really drive people to some desperate measures.
