
Do you tend to fade into the background when the music gets loud and people start moving? Do you find yourself watching others dance and wishing you could join in without channeling your inner Elaine from Seinfeld? You're definitely not the only one, but there’s hope. To help you find your rhythm and dance with ease, I sat down with Marlyn Ortiz, a professional dancer and the owner of North Hollywood's M.O.Dance and Fitness studio, to get some expert tips on dancing confidently, even when everyone's eyes are on you.
"Anyone can pick up dancing. It's about learning a few moves and owning them with style," Ortiz shared. "But it all starts with wanting to dance and express yourself in that way." With experience dancing for stars like Madonna, Taylor Swift, Britney Spears, and Mariah Carey, Ortiz definitely has the skills to help you avoid embarrassing yourself at your cousin's wedding.
(If you're more of a visual learner, be sure to check out the video at the end of this article where Ortiz demonstrates some easy, casual dance steps.)
How to Find Your Rhythm on the Dance Floor
The secret to dancing is, of course, rhythm, so being able to feel the beat is crucial. "The easiest way to get started if you're not a dancer is to put on music you enjoy and simply listen to the rhythm," Ortiz explains. "Imagine you're at a party with a live band. You'll hear the instruments, the bass, and the drums vibrating in the air—that's the pulse you should be following."
If you struggle with rhythm and just can't get the feel, you could try counting to the beat. Just count to four, over and over again—that's the song's pulse. If you're still off-beat, watching a tutorial might help you get into the groove. Check out this one:
Now that you've got the rhythm down and can bob your head without looking lost, congrats—you’re dancing! Well, kind of. The next challenge (and maybe the scariest) is moving your feet.
Introducing the "step-touch," the ultimate dance move you'll ever need
Ortiz suggests a simple starting point for dancing: the step-touch. It's an easy move that anyone can master in 30 seconds, yet it’s powerful enough to keep you from looking out of place on the dance floor—just as long as you can stay in sync with the beat.
The step-touch is exactly as its name implies. "Step on one foot, then bring the opposite foot to touch it." It's a basic move, straightforward and minimalistic: stepping on one foot, touching with the other, and using your feet to keep the rhythm of the song," Ortiz explained.
While sticking to just the step-touch can give you a minimalist cool factor, adding a little variety can make you look even better (or at least more fun). Try moving more parts of your body, rather than just nodding your head and stepping.
How do you raise your hands in the air...
Hands can feel awkward when you're dancing, just hanging there. So what should you do with them? Move them! There's no right or wrong way to use your arms when dancing, but certain movements will feel more natural than letting your hands stay in your pockets while you bob your head and step-touch.
"You could try clapping your hands," Ortiz suggests, "But most people don't sync their claps to the beat, so maybe skip that. However, if you want to channel your inner Jersey Shore, go ahead and throw in a fist pump–punch it up high. Or pretend you're hitting a punching bag, boom, boom, boom. Raise your hands to the ceiling, palms open. Just enjoy the movement."
Once you've mastered a few hand moves and are keeping them in time, start to combine everything. "Start connecting the dots," says Ortiz. "You could try a fist pump. You can step touch with a fist pump, then bob your head. Just feel the rhythm. Let your body go with the flow. Don't overthink it, just let go and move."
...and shake them like you really don't care.

For many people, the toughest part of dancing in public is that "just don't care" attitude while waving your hands in the air. Even if you know a move or two, you might feel too self-conscious to groove in front of others. Fortunately, you don't have to dance—it's a free country—but maybe you should dance. Perhaps the things that make us uncomfortable are the ones that help us grow.
If your personal dance struggle is thinking, "I'd like to dance, but I'm afraid I'll look silly," the only solution is to just do it. "Close your eyes, feel the music, and just fucking move however feels right for you," Ortiz advises. "Life's too short to worry about, 'Oh my god, I look ridiculous.' People may or may not notice you, but who cares? Get your body moving and let go of those nerves in your head... Then, you'll release your inner child. That’s the freedom. That's the moment when you're truly free."
Watch someone dance as if no one is watching.
It's difficult to explain even basic dance moves in words, so Marlyn Ortiz kindly demonstrated a few simple, casual steps on video to give you an idea of how it all looks when it comes together.
