Buzz
We've all been in this situation. You agree to join a group dinner, but you’re on a tight budget, so you settle for the soup and a side salad while your friends dive into appetizers, order main courses, and sample extravagant cocktails. You helplessly watch as the bill arrives, and your friend’s boyfriend, whom you’ve never liked, drops those dreaded five words: “Should we just split it?”
Welcome to Budget Bites Week! With food prices soaring, it may feel like your only affordable options are fast food or instant noodles. But it doesn’t have to be that way. This week, we’ll show you how to shop, cook, and eat without breaking the bank, all while keeping it fun and flavorful.
For someone with a much smaller income than their friends, this can lead to weeks of scrimping and saving to make up for a single meal. You didn’t want to come off as cheap, but shouldn’t your friends understand that money’s tight for some of us?
If this sounds familiar, here are some helpful tips to keep in mind when your financial situation differs from your friends’.
Stay In
This might not be the most exciting choice, but setting a dining out budget is important. If you suspect the place will be too pricey, it’s okay to skip it.
“Be upfront with your friends about what you can actually afford,” advises Dara Luber, TD Ameritrade’s Family Finance Specialist. True friends will understand and won’t take offense if you need to bow out of an event or two.
It’s hard at first—especially when you’re younger—but ultimately, it’s the best decision. Missing a dinner or two isn’t the end of the world (and if your friends are always choosing places you can’t afford, it might be time to rethink some friendships). Just suggest a more budget-friendly outing for a later date or explain why you can’t make it. If they value your presence, they’ll be more considerate next time.
Request Separate Checks Before the Meal Begins
Let’s say staying in isn’t an option—you’re already at the restaurant, you’ve had a soda and an appetizer, and now your friends expect you to chip in for everything (entrées, desserts, and the three bottles of wine). Or maybe it’s your friend’s birthday and you really want to be there for her. What can you do?
“If you’re at dinner and one person orders the lobster while another orders a salad, don’t hesitate to speak up when the bill comes,” advises Luber. “It may feel awkward, but true friends will get it.”
Even better, Chantel Bonneau, wealth advisor at Northwestern Mutual, suggests asking the person organizing the meal for separate checks before the meal starts. This way, you can avoid any awkwardness and the stress that comes when the bill arrives.
“Be honest and don’t hold back. Sometimes those in more fortunate financial situations may not realize the stress of sticking to a budget,” says Bonneau. “Being transparent could help them become more mindful of planning budget-friendly outings in the future.”
You could also ask a trusted friend to speak on your behalf at the end to help alleviate any potential awkwardness.
Take One for the Team
If you didn’t request separate checks earlier, consider whether the difference in cost is worth the trouble when it’s time to pay. If it’s only a few bucks, you might just let it go.
Set a spending limit in your mind. If you really have a strict budget, you can still ask for a separate check at the end. Just be honest with your friends. It might be a bit uncomfortable at first, but chances are, it won’t matter in the long run, and honesty about money is something we could all practice more often.
One thing to remember: If you end up paying more than your fair share, don’t take it out on the server by leaving a lower tip. This is how they earn their living, and it’s not their fault your group decided to split the bill this way. If it’s a real issue, ask a friend who ordered more than you to leave a bigger tip to make up for the difference.
Bring Cash Along
You don’t want to appear cheap, but at the same time, you don’t want to end up covering everyone else’s steak and wine when you only had a house salad and seltzer. If you’re working with a set amount of cash and no card, this gives you a better reason to pay just your portion. Be sure to bring enough bills so you can pay exactly, including the tip.
Alternatively, you could use an app like Venmo to cover your share, though this might make you seem a bit tight with money.
Offer a Potluck Option
If dining out is a regular thing with your friends, suggest hosting a dinner at your place or at someone else’s home instead. It’s more personal and often more affordable. You could even recommend a BYOB restaurant to save on drink costs.
If the extra cost really bothers you, be honest with your friends. Let them know you’re sticking to a budget and that you only ordered what you could afford on purpose. It would mean a lot if everyone could cover their own share moving forward. Your friends will likely understand.
