Buzz
It’s something almost everyone experiences. You start to make progress, feel good about your efforts, and then – your closest loved ones unknowingly undermine your fitness journey. Let's explore why this occurs.
Sabotage comes in many familiar forms, much like fitness quotes: "I preferred you the way you were before," "you’re wasting your time," or "what’s the harm in having pizza every now and then?" Does your family dislike you? Probably not. They’re simply being human. There are both physiological and psychological factors behind their well-meaning interference.
One reason for this behavior lies in a psychological concept called cognitive dissonance, which occurs when we experience conflicting desires. Prolific weight loss coach Adam Gilbert explains this idea here:
For instance, a smoker might justify their habit by convincing themselves that only a few people get sick from smoking, it’s only those who smoke more than they do who face the consequences, if smoking doesn’t kill them, something else will, they’ll quit next year, it’s too expensive to quit, or they deserve to smoke because they only live once. In short, they either need to take action (quit smoking and seek help) or they’ll rationalize their smoking behavior, which is what most people do.
One way your closest family members cope with their own cognitive dissonance is by unintentionally sabotaging your goals. In fact, their concern for you may be the very reason behind their actions. A recent study from The Oxford Journal of Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience reveals that loved ones often criticize your life changes because they are simply projecting their own insecurities.
What does this mean for you? If you embark on a weight loss journey, expect some resistance from those closest to you. The best approach is to brush off their negativity by understanding that it’s simply because they are human, and humans tend to act foolishly. If they didn’t care so much about you, they probably wouldn’t be so concerned about your efforts.
Photo by Stéfan.
