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Learn how to excel in your job and manage family life simultaneously. Explore more parenting images for inspiration.
LWA/Getty ImagesWhat should enhance our lives often ends up becoming a stress factor. While technology is meant to save time, its constant notifications can instead take a toll on our well-being. Finding time for fun activities can feel like just another task. As a working parent, it can be tricky to figure out who demands more of your attention – your boss or your children.
Feeling overwhelmed is a common psychological state, usually temporary rather than long-lasting [source: Families and Work Institute]. With a more competitive global economy, there's immense pressure to work harder to secure our jobs. Companies are cutting down on unnecessary expenses, and employers are increasing expectations. The advent of technology, while enabling communication and saving time, also means constant availability, especially in certain industries.
The good news is that you can regain control with effective strategies. Establishing a solid work-life balance helps you focus on yourself and your relationships. By prioritizing self-care, you can integrate healthier habits into your routine. Picture how much calmer and more in control you'd feel if you exercised a few times a week and enjoyed healthier meals. While extra sleep might seem like a luxury, it’s crucial for your health and will give you more energy.
Achieving a balance between work and home life requires effort, so you must be ready to put in the work. Keep in mind that this doesn’t mean achieving perfection; rather than trying to cram in more, focus on doing less. To get the most out of this article, understand that you can’t do everything. Prioritize what’s essential at work and what’s feasible at home. Keep reading to learn how to get started.
How Work Affects Parenting
"Work-life balance doesn’t exist," said Jack Welch, former CEO of General Electric. He explained to the Society for Human Resource Management why it's nearly impossible to balance raising a family with maintaining an executive-level career [source: Tuna, Lublin].
Welch gave this speech in June 2009. Since then, many Americans have lost their jobs or faced the fear of unemployment [source: Goldman]. Providing for a family during tough times is challenging, but it's still vital to preserve some level of personal fulfillment. The Mayo Clinic reports that dual-career couples are increasingly common, making it harder to honor commitments outside of work [source: Mayo Clinic]. This also means that in households with children, both parents face the pressure of working full-time while trying to raise a family [source: University of Chicago News Office].
When women decide to have children, they often face the challenge of being perceived as less committed to their careers. While maternity leave is federally protected, taking time off to care for a newborn can negatively impact a mother's professional advancement [source: FamilyEducation.com]. In some workplaces, factors like visibility—how you're seen and perceived around the office—can be just as significant as actual job performance. As Welch stated, you may not get promoted if you're "not there in the clutch" [source: Tuna, Lublin].
Researchers from the University of Chicago found that the time parents can spend with their children is crucial. If that time diminishes, it can lead to feelings of estrangement or neglect from the child's perspective. Stress and exhaustion from work can also cause negative emotions to affect the home environment. However, studies show that mothers can alleviate stress by spending time with their families, and fathers who invest quality time with their children are less likely to let work issues interfere with family time [source: University of Chicago News Office]. Remember, never feel guilty for being a working parent and having a family.
Even though your children may be your top priority, you must remember to take care of yourself first. On the next page, we'll explore how maintaining a work-life balance is essential for your overall well-being.
According to a former CEO of General Electric, probably not. In June 2009, Jack Welch argued that women can't reach the top unless they prioritize their careers over family [source: Tuna, Lublin]. He pointed out that women like Patricia Woertz, CEO of Archer Daniels Midland Co., and Ellen Kullman, CEO of DuPont Co., are exceptions. It requires a unique kind of mother to achieve such a feat: Woertz, for instance, drove herself to the hospital from a meeting just before giving birth to twins [source: Birger].
Career coach Dr. Lois Frankel believes it's possible for women to succeed without giving up their personal lives. She argues, "It's a fallacy that you have to give up your life to have a successful career." To show dedication to your job, she advises minimizing family focus at work. While having a few family photos at your desk is fine, overdoing it can reduce your professional credibility.
When asked to stay late or travel extensively for work, Frankel advises women never to cancel plans with their children unless it jeopardizes their job. Continuously prioritizing work over family can make you seem like a follower, not a leader [source: Frankel].
The Effects of Being Overworked
Even if your job doesn't demand excessive time away from home, the stress of being overworked can impact your interactions with others. You'll find it harder to nurture relationships with friends, your partner, and, as mentioned earlier, your children. With kids, it’s crucial to be present and provide guidance. However, it’s also important to recognize the toll unhealthy relationships can take on you, and you deserve occasional time for yourself [source: Weiss].
When personal time becomes scarce, it's easy to neglect essential activities like exercise and sleep. If you find yourself juggling other responsibilities just to make time for your hobbies, you're likely to enjoy them less, and it may even add to your stress. A helpful approach is to view your personal time as a relationship and prioritize it in the same way you would with any other important connection [source: Rauh].
According to the Families and Work Institute study, individuals who feel overworked tend to harbor resentment toward their coworkers and are more likely to be dissatisfied with their companies [source: Families and Work Institute]. When you're constantly thinking about what you'd rather be doing, your work becomes less fulfilling, and your motivation to climb the corporate ladder or take on new challenges diminishes. This negative mindset could impact your attitude, potentially hindering your progress or even leading to job loss.
Studies indicate that overworked employees are less productive, incur higher health care costs, and compromise workplace safety [source: Families and Work Institute]. On the bright side, some companies understand the value of treating their employees well. Numerous magazines and websites rank companies based on input from HR departments and happy employees. We’ve highlighted some of the benefits that matter most to working parent families, and you can also search online according to your priorities, such as industry, location, and specific perks.
Ready to make a change? In the next section, we'll dive into strategies that can help you start balancing your work and personal life.
Fortune ranks the "100 Best Companies to Work For" by evaluating key factors such as child care, health care, telecommuting, sabbaticals, unique perks, and overall work-life balance. On the 2009 list, 32 of these companies offered on-site child care, 75 provided a compressed workweek, and 83 supported telecommuting [source: Fortune].
The magazine Working Mother publishes an annual list highlighting companies with female-friendly policies and unique benefits. Some notable mentions from 2009 include Boston Consulting Group, which surveys its female workforce multiple times a year to assess benefits. MassMutual Financial Group fosters a welcoming environment for expectant mothers, offering an on-site clinic and phone-based health support. Patagonia stands out by encouraging employees to intern with environmental nonprofits, and it offers paid parental leave, child care, even for business trips [source: Working Mother].
Many organizations offer flexible working hours and employee assistance programs that provide access to professionals such as doctors, counselors, psychologists, and time management consultants. These programs are usually free and confidential, and they help employees manage personal issues like relationship challenges and financial difficulties.
Suggestions for Balancing Professional and Personal Life
To begin, track your daily activities for a full week. Once you have your schedule, analyze it and eliminate any unfulfilling or time-consuming tasks. This is the moment to evaluate your responsibilities and set your real priorities [source: Mayo Clinic]. Be honest about what truly matters to you, rather than what you think should be a priority. Letting go of unnecessary obligations can be tough, but experts agree that it’s a crucial step you can take.
Even if you manage your time efficiently, you’ll still face interruptions and distractions, particularly as a working parent. With all the extra time you've managed to find, others may assume you have the bandwidth to organize the school bake sale or head the holiday party. Learn to say no, politely but firmly, and avoid committing to extra tasks that either don't interest you or aren't essential. Your time is valuable, so don't let others take it away from you.
If you find yourself constantly cleaning whenever you're home, consider lowering your expectations a bit:
- Learn to overlook small messes that do not pose any health or safety risks.
- Make clear communication a habit. You'll save time and effort by giving and receiving precise instructions, ensuring tasks are done right the first time.
- Resist the misconception that the number of hours worked is the best way to gauge work performance.
- Understand that a content home life makes you more motivated to tackle work challenges, giving you the confidence to discuss scheduling flexibility with your boss.
- Use your commute as a mental break, creating a clear divide between your work and personal life.
- Turn off your phone and computer after hours, and leave work-related concerns for the next day.
- Dedicate time each day to unwind, and set aside time each week for an activity you love. Focus on nurturing relationships with yourself, your friends, and your family. By building strong connections, you create a support network that you can lean on—and reciprocate for when they need help. To ensure you get personal time, try swapping babysitting duties with friends or neighbors to enjoy a night off and reduce childcare costs [source: Rauh].
Even the most efficient employees need support now and then. Research indicates that workers with flexible schedules feel less overburdened than those without, even when the total hours worked are the same [source: Families and Work Institute]. When discussing flexible hours, focus on how this will benefit your employer and highlight that you consider yourself an asset, which underscores the importance of keeping you satisfied.
Concentrating while at work reduces the chances of being seen as uncommitted (even if you're cutting back on overtime). Dr. Frankel advises against sharing too much personal information at work, such as your personal obligations and hectic schedule, which might give the impression that you struggle with stress. Protect your privacy by keeping family matters private.
If you wonder whether you're spending too much time at work, Dr. Frankel offers this advice: "You owe the company an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. You owe the company a reasonable amount of overtime (with or without pay, but always without complaint). You don't owe the company your soul" [source: Frankel].
