Buzz
Just a few weeks into 2022, and there’s already no shortage of reasons to feel frustrated. This has been a recurring theme, particularly over the past two years as the world has navigated the challenges of a pandemic.
While it’s tempting to remain in a constant state of irritation—angry at both the trivial and the significant—there comes a moment when you might pause and reflect on the root of your anger. Is it solely due to external circumstances, or is there a deeper, more intricate issue at play? Here are some indicators that you may be grappling with suppressed anger.
Understanding the Concept of Repressed Anger
Anger is a universal emotion, yet people handle it differently. Some react impulsively with outbursts, while others suppress their feelings entirely. For instance, individuals with suppressed anger deliberately choose to ignore these emotions.
However, those with repressed anger unconsciously avoid expressing it, often driven by fear or shame, as Nicole Arzt, a licensed marriage and family therapist, describes in an article for Choosing Therapy.
What are the indicators of repressed anger?
Artz notes that repressed anger can manifest in numerous subtle ways, affecting a person’s emotions, thoughts, and actions. Frequently, it remains unnoticed until the anger reaches extreme levels and results in an outburst.
Rather than reaching that breaking point, watch for these signs of repressed anger, as highlighted by Artz and clinical psychologist Terri Cole:
Defensiveness
Do you become defensive when someone mentions that you seem angry? Artz explains that individuals with repressed anger often refuse to acknowledge their frustration, even when it’s evident to others. “This defensiveness prevents them from accepting and identifying their anger, leading them to downplay, overlook, or reject it,” she notes.
Sarcasm
Are you excessively sarcastic? “Sarcasm is essentially a passive-aggressive method of conveying anger, disappointment, or frustration,” Cole mentions in a blog post. “If you frequently catch yourself expressing the opposite of your true feelings with a sarcastic tone or an eye roll, it’s worth exploring why this feels safer than being straightforward.”
Passive-aggressive behavior
When conflict is unavoidable, do you often resort to passive-aggressive behavior in your interactions? “Passive aggression is a way of indirectly expressing anger,” Cole clarifies. “Direct communication is far more effective. While acting out your anger passively might feel ‘safe’ and seem like it respects your emotions, it ultimately doesn’t resolve anything.”
These are just a few of the numerous signs of repressed anger. For more examples and in-depth insights, refer to the articles by Artz and Cole.
How to address repressed anger
If you realize that you’ve likely been suppressing your anger, you’ll probably want to begin addressing—or at least start processing—it. This is a subject we’ve explored in detail at Mytour, so you can start your journey here. If therapy is accessible to you and your repressed anger is significantly affecting your life, it might be worth considering as an option.
