Buzz
You might be familiar with the famous book, 'What to Expect When You're Expecting'. Perhaps your friends and family, especially the women, keep offering their advice. Maybe you've been through pregnancy a few times. But there are some topics that don't get as much attention when it comes to pregnancy. It's time to share the unspoken truths.
Pregnancy, like each child, is one-of-a-kind. You could face some or none of the challenges listed below, depending on how lucky you are. While typical physical symptoms—like morning sickness, exhaustion, and intense cravings—are well-known, the emotional impacts of pregnancy are often overlooked. So, to all current and future mothers, here’s a heads-up about what you might experience.
Your Body Becomes Public Domain
As soon as you reveal your pregnancy (or when it becomes obvious), the personal space you once had disappears. You'll start receiving plenty of unsolicited advice on what you should or shouldn't eat (hint: avoid drinking coffee in public), hear shocking birth stories, and deal with probing questions and uncomfortable remarks that no one without a baby will have to endure. Examples include 'Did you undergo fertility treatments?' or 'I hope you can shed all that weight after giving birth.'
And then there’s the unsolicited touching. Something about your baby bump seems to give strangers the impression that it’s okay to touch you, often without asking, which can be quite unsettling. Pennsylvania even passed a law affirming that pregnant women have the right not to be touched by strangers without their consent.
The message is loud and clear: Many people treat pregnancy (and the entire process of giving birth and raising a child) as something that belongs to the public. To deal with rude advice or comments, you can tell those who want to rub your belly (as though you’re a good luck charm) that you're about to be overwhelmed by morning sickness. If you're facing unsolicited remarks, simply respond with 'interesting' or 'yep,' as SheKnows advises. Everyone has an opinion when it comes to pregnancy and babies, so you'll find yourself biting your tongue a lot more than expected. It’s great practice for the future.
But it’s not just strangers offering unsolicited advice—it’s your family and friends (who might start sounding a bit unhinged) and everyone else who’s concerned. Don’t hold it against them. Just wait until you’ve had your baby and spot someone else pregnant—you’ll become just as insufferable with your advice!
You Might Start Feeling Like a Lab Rat
Your body is no longer entirely yours (as mentioned earlier). Even if strangers leave you alone, you’ll still be poked, prodded, and continuously monitored by your doctors to ensure both you and your baby are healthy. The older you get, the more justified these checkups seem to become. It’ll feel like you’re spending more time in doctor’s waiting rooms and around people wearing latex gloves than anywhere else. And if you didn’t realize it yet, nothing is just about you anymore.
It’s a mix of comfort and anxiety. You eagerly await the sonograms, the weekly blood test results, the sound of your baby’s heartbeat (steady and strong), and the assurance that everything is progressing smoothly. For some, this constant checking is reassuring, but for others, it can be unsettling.
I had a smooth pregnancy, but I was nervous at every appointment, constantly being poked and prodded, so I can't even imagine what it’s like for someone with a more complicated pregnancy. I wish someone had told me that once you get pregnant, you’re placed on a different conveyor belt—one where you’re examined much more frequently, and that can make you feel at least a little paranoid. (Wore heels during pregnancy? Who knows how many IQ points you might have taken from your child!) All this testing is uncomfortable and humbling in ways you might not expect, but it’s just part of the journey.
Find the best doctor you can, someone you truly trust. I can't stress this enough because even a good doctor might leave you with doubts. (For all the poking and prodding I endured, I still felt let down by my doctors, which only proves that the unexpected is bound to happen.) Get to know your tests and their results as much as you can, so that at least you’ll have a voice in what happens.
You’ll Join a Whole New Community
It’s funny—while the constant intrusion from others might annoy you during pregnancy, you might find yourself unable to resist sharing that special glow. Found out you’re expecting? Time to post those pictures of the pregnancy test results!
Honestly, even if you consider yourself a shy person, pregnancy might push you to share things on Babycenter or other parenting forums that you’d never admit to your closest friends or even your partner. Pregnancy leads to—and even makes you want to share—some pretty strange things: dreams about your baby’s gender, the name you'd choose for your newborn (if you had full control), the unusual scent of your urine (whether or not it's pregnancy-related), how varicose veins in certain areas have become more visible, and the frustration you feel trying to do basic things you once could—just because you're pregnant. It’s a mix of bonding and bragging.
There are a lot of other things I think women should be warned about before they get pregnant, but you've probably heard many of them already. Women will only experience this unique stage a few times in their lives, so make the most of that rollercoaster of a journey—terrible yet wonderful.
Photos by Agnes Yves, Editor B, TipsTimesAdmin.
