Why it's more effective to distract yourself than rely on 'positive thinking'

Toxic positivity has faced significant criticism recently. While it's important to avoid harsh self-criticism and find value in positive affirmations when anxious (I personally repeat, “I have all the skills I need,” a bit like a second-rate Stuart Smalley before doing something nerve-wracking), there's also real merit in simply allowing ourselves to experience negative emotions instead of masking them with cliched phrases like 'good vibes only,' 'everything happens for a reason,' or the hollow 'you got this.'

Studies show that distraction is more effective in reducing anxiety than forcing positive thoughts

When we're anxious, conventional wisdom tells us to bombard ourselves with optimistic thoughts. While that’s not necessarily harmful, this research revealed that distraction is actually a more powerful tool for alleviating anxiety than 'positive anticipatory thoughts.' In the study, adolescents were told they would perform a basketball jump shot—being judged by a gym teacher they’d never met—while their classmates watched. (Anyone who had to climb that dreaded rope in 8th grade gym class during the now-defunct Presidential Fitness Test can immediately understand the anxiety. For adults, it's the equivalent of being asked to share a personal tidbit in a meeting.)

In preparation for the jump shot test, half of the students were instructed to focus on repetitive positive thoughts about themselves, while the other half distracted themselves by thinking about mundane topics like 'three birds on a branch in a tree' or their father’s car. The study revealed that those who engaged in distraction maintained lower levels of anxiety, while those who focused on positive thoughts experienced significantly higher anxiety, more catastrophic thinking, and negative predictions about their performance and appearance in the sport.

Why distraction doesn’t work as a long-term fix

According to Verywell Mind, the key to effective distraction is using it to temporarily shift your focus away from strong negative emotions. While distraction can reduce their intensity in the short term, it’s not meant to be a permanent escape or avoidance method. (They recommend revisiting the emotion once its immediate impact has diminished, and managing it using techniques like expressive writing.)

Healthy methods of distraction

As adults, healthy distractions can range from simple mental exercises like counting backward in increments of 8, observing and recalling colors and objects around you, or solving mental challenges such as crossword puzzles or Sudoku, to activities like exercise, chores, and video games. In her book SuperBetter: The Power of Living Gamefully, Dr. Jane McGonigal supports the idea that the “constantly escalating challenge” in gaming can help build resilience, confidence, courage, and perseverance, which in turn helps us achieve more difficult goals.

While excessive distraction can lead to negative consequences (such as difficulty concentrating, social media dependency, reckless driving, or a mountain of 673 random papers piling up on my kitchen counter), it remains a legitimate short-term coping mechanism for handling stressful situations.

So, the next time you're feeling anxious about that first date or an upcoming presentation at work, you’ve got the go-ahead to hit the tennis courts, dive into Call of Duty, or binge-watch Money Heist, after all.