Buzz
1. Still under review
The young man returned home after his driving test with a confused expression:
– This is a real mess – he said to his father – The truck is having issues.
– Does that mean you failed?
– Not exactly. The entire panel of judges is gone!
2. Where did you get that from?
During a maritime graduation exam, the professor asked a student:
– If a storm comes from the right side of the ship, what will you do?
– I will drop the anchor.
– What if it comes from the bow?
– I’ll drop the second anchor.
– And if it comes from the stern?
– I’ll drop another anchor.
– Where are you getting all these anchors from?
– Well, where do you get all these storms from?
3. A costly mistake
The employee arrived at work with both ears bandaged. His boss, surprised, asked:
– What happened to you?
– Yesterday, my wife was away, so I had to do the ironing. When she called, I mistakenly picked up the iron to answer the phone.
– That’s ridiculous! Why is the other ear also bandaged?
– Well, I made another mistake while hurriedly calling the doctor.
4. Người hành tinh khác
Hai chú say gặp nhau, một chú chỉ tay lên trời và hỏi chú kia:
– Thưa ông, trên kia là mặt trăng hay mặt trời?
– Dạ, xin lỗi ông, tôi không phải là người địa phương nên cũng không rõ
5. The Ultimate Trick
A girl studying in Hanoi received a message at midnight: “Hi, can we get to know each other? Do you have a boyfriend yet?” “I already do!” “Oh, is that so? Well, this is your dad. Tomorrow, I’m coming to your place for a family meeting about this!”
The next day, the girl stubbornly refused to go home. That night, another message came through: “What do I need to do to become your friend? Can we get to know each other? Do you have a boyfriend yet?” “No, I don’t!” “You’ve really disappointed me. A simple test could have shown us if we were meant for each other. I think we should break up.” “Oh, I’m so sorry, I thought it was my dad. Please explain!” “Explain what? I’m your dad! If you don’t come home tomorrow, don’t bother coming back! And bring your boyfriend along too!”
6. Bố khổ là tại ai?
Vừa về đến nhà thấy con trai khóc rấm rứt, bố vội hỏi:
Có chuyện gì thế con trai cưng của bố?Cậu con trai ấm ức:- Mẹ lại mới mắng con suốt mấy tiếng đồng hồ. Tất cả là tại bố, nếu ngày xưa bố lấy một người vợ hiền dịu thì giờ con đâu khổ thế này!Vỗ về an ủi con trai hồi lâu, bỗng dưng nghĩ ra điều gì đó bố quát:- Đừng có đổ lỗi bừa! Không có mày thì bố mày cũng không bị ép cưới đâu con ạ.- !?!
7. The secret to wealth for men
Devastated by his failed startup, To lamented to Teo:
– Brother, I've failed again!
Teo patted his friend on the back and spoke calmly:
– You’re still young, when I was your age I had nothing. I had to struggle through many jobs to make money and build a stable future. I never gave up on my dream of success, even when it seemed like I was on the brink of collapse. Look at me now, success finally came.
To wiped his tears and asked:
– Please, give me some advice, I feel so lost.
– Marry a rich woman. – Teo replied.
– !!!
8. The Father of the Victim
A traffic accident just happened on the street. Curious onlookers crowded around, eager to see what had occurred. A soldier arrived late and couldn’t get through. Frustrated, he shouted loudly:
– I’m the father of the victim!
The crowd turned in surprise and quickly made way for him. The “victim” turned out to be… a dog that had been hit by a car.
9. Even the talented can't win!
On the day of the apocalypse, Heaven and Hell were disputing territory on Earth. At the negotiation table, Satan – the representative of Hell – proposed a football match to resolve the issue. Satan's assistant whispered:
– This could be very disadvantageous for us, since all the skilled players have ascended to Heaven.
– Don't worry, don't you remember that all the referees are down in Hell?
10. Not a small matter
A prisoner asked his cellmate:
– Why are you in here?
– I left my wife...
– That's it? That's nothing serious!
– ...I jumped from the third floor.
