1. To understand someone's upbringing, observe how they treat the elderly and children
The elderly and children are often difficult to please, so if you want to know if someone has been raised properly, observe how they behave towards them. If they remain polite, calm, and composed, it shows that they are rational, thoughtful, and have been taught values that respect human dignity.
You should take every opportunity to observe them in situations where they don't expect it, such as interacting with a server, a beggar, a child, or a stranger. This type of observation is more revealing than controlled situations, as the person is unguarded, showing their true nature more clearly.


2. To understand someone's character, observe how others treat them during tough times
As the saying goes, 'Only in times of hardship can one truly understand the heart of a person!' Don't boast about having many friends or close acquaintances. True friends are those who stay by your side during tough times, offering support and staying loyal. Only then will you know who truly values your friendship.
Those who are ready to help without expecting anything in return when they face challenges are certainly good people—those who live with integrity and know how to choose the right people to form meaningful relationships with.


3. To understand their future, observe if they are eager for small, petty gains
People with the potential for great achievements usually have a broad vision, decisive character, and won’t be tempted by small, immediate rewards. They focus on larger, long-term benefits. Such individuals are also open-minded and full of determination.
In ancient times, it was believed that a person’s true nature is revealed when they encounter something they desire the most. For example, someone with a strong love for food can’t resist a delicious dish, a person obsessed with beauty will be attracted to beautiful faces, and someone driven by greed will be drawn to wealth. By observing these desires, you can better understand a person’s true character.
In practice, you can set up situations where they are exposed to these desires, making them forget their role and revealing their true nature.


4. To determine if someone is trustworthy, observe their promises
A trustworthy person will always keep their promises. They never make empty promises just to win others over.
It's essential to evaluate whether their words align with their actions. A person who speaks but does not follow through is one who lacks integrity and will soon lose the trust others have in them. Trust is the foundation of character. "A person without trust cannot stand," meaning someone who fails to honor their word will find no place in the world.
As Zhuge Liang stated: “Words without integrity show one's incapability,” meaning a person who talks but doesn’t act is someone without trustworthiness. Therefore, to truly understand someone's credibility, observe how they work. Actions speak louder than words—listening to what someone says is important, but watching what they do is more insightful.


5. To know someone's true nature, observe their eyes
As the ancients said, the eyes are the window to the soul and the only thing that cannot lie. Therefore, to understand someone's true character, pay attention to their gaze when they communicate.
If the person is composed and serious, their eyes will be firm and direct. However, if they are deceitful, cunning, or calculating, their eyes will dart around like a snake’s, revealing their dishonesty and hidden motives.


6. To determine if a person is well-cultivated or their character good or bad, observe their meal
A person with good character knows table manners, exhibits composure and respect while eating, and shows consideration to both the servers and those they are dining with. These seemingly small actions can reflect the true nature of a person.
A person who is picky about food often displays a shallow, untrustworthy nature. Life is full of complexities, and a meal is a small test — the words and actions in front of others can determine success or failure. Even the most hidden motives are hard to conceal, especially in everyday activities.
Life is governed by cause and effect: the actions you sow will determine the harvest. If you live earnestly, accumulate virtue, and appreciate the nourishment you receive, you will be rewarded. Conversely, a life marked by selfishness, disrespect for food, and poor habits will eventually lead to repercussions. Life surprises you with the outcomes of your past actions, especially in times of hardship.


7. To understand someone's temperament, observe how they behave with alcohol
Alcohol is one of the best "measures" for understanding a person's true nature. The popular saying goes, "When the wine enters, the words come out." A person’s true character, often deeply hidden, can be revealed once they are intoxicated. This means that when someone is drunk, you can see their true morals and personality.
Don’t underestimate this method of gauging someone. In Chinese history, many literary officials and military leaders were executed for crimes committed while drunk. Even the founder of the Song Dynasty, Zhao Kuangyin, successfully used the strategy of "disarming soldiers with alcohol" to consolidate power.


8. To understand someone's family background, observe their circle of friends
A person's friends are a reflection of their lifestyle, behavior, and character. If they are good people with a healthy lifestyle, they will naturally avoid associating with complex or dangerous individuals, preferring the company of those who share similar values and habits.
The saying, "Birds of a feather flock together," holds true in this case. Therefore, when a friendship or relationship dissolves, it often comes down to incompatibility. If two people are truly a match, regardless of their backgrounds, they will find harmony together, whether in good times or bad.


9. To understand someone's personality, observe their morning routine
A person who wakes up with a cheerful face is surely someone with a pleasant, upbeat personality. On the other hand, someone who starts their day with a frown is likely to be grumpy, difficult to approach, and prone to worry.
Those who go back to sleep after waking up tend to be lazy. People who lie in bed staring at the ceiling are often dreamers, trying to hold onto the dreams from the night before and pondering life. They tend to be creative, philosophical, and deep thinkers. If someone immediately checks social media upon waking, it indicates they live in the virtual world and care more about distant people than those around them.


10. To know if someone truly cares about you, wait for the difficult times
The most telling moment of a person's true character is when you're facing difficulties in life. If they stand by you, offering support through tough times, then congratulations, you've found someone sincere and kind-hearted.
Life has its ups and downs. In times of adversity, don't hesitate to open up to your friends. A true friend will listen, provide constructive advice, and offer genuine help rather than distancing themselves from you.
As the saying goes, adversity reveals true loyalty. When you're at the peak of success, many people may surround you, but when you're in a tough spot, that's when you find out who the real ones are. These are the true friends, the ones with integrity.


