While parents undeniably love their children, it's essential to recognize a crucial piece of advice: don't overprotect them. If parents handle every task for their kids, from the smallest to the biggest, out of fear or overprotection, it can backfire. Children will grow dependent and not know their own capabilities without their parents' help. As they mature, they will rely solely on their parents in times of trouble, never learning how to resolve issues on their own. This dependency leads to a lack of confidence, and they may feel discouraged when facing failure.
In Eastern cultures, parents tend to be more protective compared to their Western counterparts, leading to children becoming more dependent and less creative. Therefore, parents should reconsider how they express their love to allow their children to grow naturally and independently.
Avoid overprotecting and excessively pampering your childIf your child is playing and you want them to take a shower, give them a moment to finish their activity before they switch tasks. Never force them to comply immediately. Children find it difficult to follow orders on the spot, so instead of demanding they finish homework before playing, let them take a break and return to their work later. Teach them in a way that respects their pace and needs. Avoid being overly strict or dictatorial if you don't want to be seen as an authoritarian parent.
Don't force children to follow your commands without flexibility
3. Don't Be Too Lenient with Your Child
In the past, there was a belief that "parents give birth to children, but the sky gives their nature". This led some parents to let their children do whatever they want. In other families, parents were too busy with work to focus on raising their children. This is a huge mistake. The family is the first foundation where a child grows and where their character is formed. If parents don’t guide and teach their children properly, how can they expect them to grow up well? Parents must not neglect their role, or else their children may go astray, indulging in harmful behavior. Don't allow your children to do things beyond acceptable limits, as you may regret it later when it's too late.
Don’t neglect your children, or they may go astray
4. Avoid Lecturing and Talking Too Much
In many families, it's often the mothers who tend to over-explain. When a child makes a mistake, the mother might provide endless reasons for why the child shouldn't do something, or why they should behave differently. She will repeat the same mistake her child made over and over again, creating a lengthy discussion. This approach isn't effective for the child. All the child feels is frustration and fatigue, and they don't truly understand what the mother is trying to teach. Therefore, mothers should instead offer gentle reminders, explaining the situation simply and concisely, rather than constantly nagging throughout the day.
Không suốt ngày nói nói và nói
5. Không lúc này lúc khác, hãy nhất quán
Khi bạn dạy con điều gì thì hãy kiên định với những điều mẹ đã dạy con, đừng lúc thì bắt con làm thế này, lúc thì nói con làm thế khác. Trẻ sẽ bối rối không hiểu mẹ thật sự muốn trẻ làm gì? Cha và mẹ hãy nhất quán trong quan điểm nuôi dạy con cái, nếu không trẻ ở giữa sẽ cảm thấy ấm ức, khó xử vì ba thì bảo một đường, còn mẹ thì bảo một nẻo nhé.
Cha mẹ hãy nhất quán trong cách dạy trẻ
6. Don't Restrict, Let Your Child Be a Child
Parents should avoid imposing their own thoughts on their children. Don’t restrict them or try to control every aspect of their lives. When your child prefers to play instead of studying, remember that it's natural for kids to want to play. Give them some free time for fun, and studying can follow later. If your child wants to hang out with friends you don't approve of, don’t simply forbid it because you assume they’ll have a negative influence. Ask your child why they want to spend time with those friends, and you might be surprised by the reasons. Allow your child some freedom to play, make choices, and decide what they want, all while staying involved and offering guidance and supervision.
Give your child the right to play, after all, they’re just a kid
7. Don’t Give Your Child Too Much Money
Money is a tool, not a decoration, and it comes with both positive and negative consequences. It's like a double-edged sword — if you’re not careful, it can hurt you. Even though we live in an era where life is easier, money is still something parents must manage wisely. Teach your children how to earn and spend money responsibly. Giving your child too much money and buying expensive things for them from a young age will make them lose sight of the true value of money, and as a result, they won't appreciate what they have.
Parents should manage money wisely
8. Don't Act Like a Misbehaving Child in Front of Your Kids
Parents have a duty to set an example. Your children should see you as a responsible, honest person who completes tasks. Avoid complaining or whining about everything in front of them. Parents should never argue or physically fight in front of their children. Particularly, we must never use violence in front of them. Acting like an immature or reckless adult in front of your kids teaches them bad behavior. Consider this: if parents argue and fight in front of their children, what’s to stop those children from doing the same when they grow up? So, always strive to be respectful and civilized in front of your children!
Never argue in front of your childrenWhen parents humiliate or belittle their children, they unintentionally damage their child’s self-image and disregard all the effort the child is putting into improving themselves. Instead of putting them down, allow your child to recognize their own shortcomings. Encourage and motivate them to strive for better results. Words of encouragement when they need it will be the most effective driving force for progress, unlike negative comments like, 'You're useless' or 'You can't do anything right.' These kinds of remarks won’t push the child to try harder but will hurt them emotionally instead.
Don't humiliate your child
10. Never Hit or Threaten
Many parents struggle to find effective ways to get their children to obey, often resorting to physical punishment. Children can be stubborn, and some parents believe they will only listen when faced with pain. For younger children, some even resort to threats to get them to behave. For example, they may say things like, 'If you don’t eat, the police will come,' or 'If you don’t go to sleep, the boogeyman will come,' or even 'I’ll lock you in your room if you don’t listen.' While these threats might make children comply, it’s important to understand that children raised in violent or threatening environments often become aggressive, violent, and more likely to resolve problems with force. Children who are frequently threatened may develop anxiety, fear, and even panic disorders. It’s crucial that we, as adults, stop hitting and threatening our children so they can grow up in a healthy, natural environment.
Never hit or threaten your children
11. Never Force Children to Make Promises
When a child makes a mistake, after some correction, parents often ask the child to promise not to repeat the same thing again, or to assure that they won’t do it next time. The truth is, only the parents remember these promises; the child forgets them. Even if the child remembers, they might just go ahead and do what they want, despite the promise. They’ll think, 'It’s no big deal, I can promise, and things will go back to normal.' Constantly making promises without keeping them will eventually teach the child to be someone who makes empty promises. So, parents should never force children to make promises. Instead, encourage and motivate them to do better next time.
Don’t force your child to make promises
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