How to encourage someone to seek therapy

Therapy has been proven to be effective in helping people of all ages overcome issues ranging from depression and anxiety to phobias and substance abuse. Many individuals feel hesitant or resistant to therapy for various reasons. If someone close to you or a friend needs therapy, there are ways to bring it up without making them feel ashamed or embarrassed. It's essential to approach the topic delicately in order to encourage your loved one to accept the help they need.

Tell your loved one or friend that their feelings are normal. Whether the person you're trying to persuade is struggling with addiction, a mental health disorder, or simply going through a tough time, telling them that what they are experiencing is natural is the first step in removing the stigma from therapy. Remind them that many others in their age group, gender, ethnicity, and nationality are also facing similar challenges and have used therapy without feeling embarrassed or ashamed.

Remind your loved one that their issues are caused by medical conditions. Depression, anxiety, and phobias are all medical problems. At their core, addiction is also a health issue.

• Try comparing therapy to visiting a doctor for any other illness. Ask your loved one, 'You wouldn't avoid seeing a doctor for heart or lung problems, right? So what's different here?'

Remind them that everyone needs help at some point. Recent studies show that 27% of adults in the U.S. have sought and received some form of therapy for mental health issues, meaning over a quarter of the population, or 80 million people.

• Try saying something like, 'I'm always here for you, no matter what. I’ll never look down on you for needing help.'

Let your loved one know that you fully support them. By assuring them that you won’t view them any differently for accepting therapy, you confirm that there is no shame associated with seeking help through therapy.

Ask your loved one to share what they fear. Encouraging them to open up about their specific fears and anxieties could be the first step in persuading them to see a therapist.

• Start the conversation by admitting some of your own fears and concerns. This might make the discussion feel more like a conversation about fears and therapy rather than a demand for help.
• If other friends have successfully gone through therapy, mention them as examples to show how effective therapy can be.
• You could also ask a friend who has been through therapy to share their experience with your loved one, which could help ease their fears and answer any questions they might have.

Use logic to address each fear. Logic and reason are the only things that can effectively dispel fear and negative thinking.

• If they fear that therapy will become an endless cycle, reassure them that this is not the case. Most cognitive-behavioral therapy typically lasts 10-20 sessions, though it may be shorter or longer depending on the individual. Some psychological therapy programs may last 1-2 years, depending on the issue being addressed, but some patients feel better after just one session. Also, remind your loved one that they can always decide when they've had enough. There is no fixed agreement on the duration.
• If cost is a concern, help them find a therapist who accepts insurance or offers lower-cost options.
• No matter what your loved one fears, try to alleviate their worries by saying, 'That's not a problem' and suggesting solutions or action plans.
• Some therapists offer free phone consultations before the actual therapy session. This gives your loved one a chance to voice their concerns and begin familiarizing themselves with the therapist.

Help your loved one find a therapist. You can easily search online for a therapist who fits their needs. The American Psychological Association offers a free service to find a psychologist at http://locator.apa.org/.

Offer to accompany them to their first therapy session. While you likely can't attend the entire session, having someone supportive with them can make starting therapy easier. Some therapists may even allow you to join the session, but only with the client’s consent.

Explain the confidentiality between the therapist and the client to your loved one. What your loved one shares with the therapist is typically protected and kept private.

• Remember that confidentiality laws vary by country and state, but all therapists are required to clearly explain the details of confidentiality in both verbal and written form. You can request a copy of the confidentiality agreement before scheduling the appointment.

Ask your loved one about the weaknesses that concern them. Remind them that crying or talking about their troubles with someone can be a great relief. According to a recent study, nearly 89% of people feel better after releasing emotions, such as crying, and doctors often recommend talking about problems as a way to find emotional relief.

• Try telling your loved one, 'It's completely normal to open up to someone. We often confide in our friends and people who matter to us. You need to build a relationship with your therapist, and honesty is key to making that happen.'
• Remind them that facing emotions can be daunting, especially if they’ve been suppressing those feelings, but therapists are trained to help clients process and confront strong emotions safely to avoid feeling overwhelmed.

Remind them of the potential outcomes. The worst-case scenario is that nothing changes. However, the best-case scenario is that your loved one finds comfort, relief, and a new perspective on life.

• Reassure them once again that you care for them and will stand by them no matter what.
• Encourage them to be open and honest with their therapist and explain if something isn’t working. A therapist may try different approaches or help the client find a more suitable professional.