Buzz
If your boyfriend is going through a tough time, you'll want to brighten his day as soon as possible. Unexpected challenges can arise at any moment, so it's helpful to know exactly what will make him smile. In this guide, we’ll explore numerous ways to offer him comfort even when you're not physically together. Check out these helpful suggestions for cheering your boyfriend up over the phone—choose the ones that resonate most, and he’ll know that you’ve got his back, no matter what.
This article is based on an interview with John Keegan, founder of The Awakened Lifestyle, a professional dating coach. Read the full interview here.}
Steps
Let him know you’re always there to listen.
Assure him that he can reach out anytime he needs to talk. Even if your day is busy, let him know it's perfectly okay to send a message. Let him know you’ll find a moment to focus on him fully. Remind him that you’re always there to support him, around the clock. You can say things like:
- “Text me whenever you need, love. ❤️ I’m always here for you.”
- “I’m free after 6 PM, all evening. 😚 I’ll answer as soon as you call.”
- “You’re never alone. 💕 Just send a message, and I’ll be there.”
Encourage him to open up about his emotions.
Hold off on trying to solve his problems to honor his autonomy. He may want to find his own answers. Ask him to share his perspective so you can better understand what’s troubling him. Then, check in with him about the best way he prefers to communicate—whether it’s through a phone call or longer text messages that help him express his feelings. You can show your support by saying:
- “You seem a little down. 😔 Want to talk about it?”
- “If you’re up for it, I’d love to hear more about how you’re feeling.”
- “What works best for you? Texting or a call? I just want to know what’s going on in your mind.”
Show appreciation for his honesty with you.
Appreciate his openness to create a safe space for your conversations. Regardless of how he’s feeling—whether frustrated, sad, or anything else—let him know that his emotions are always valid. Even if he expresses himself differently than you would or sees things in a way you don’t, embrace his perspective. For example:
- “That makes so much sense. 🫂 Thank you for sharing that with me.”
- “I can really relate to what you said. You explained everything so well. 💖”
- “I appreciate your honesty. From what I understand, you’re feeling… Does that sound right?”
Send words of support and motivation.
Helping boost his confidence can ease stress and worry. If he’s feeling anxious or uncertain, it’s important to first validate his feelings so he knows you’re listening to his concerns. Then, give him a boost of encouragement. This will help calm his nerves and remind him that he’s capable.
- “I know you’re stressed, but you’ve got this! 💪 😚”
- “I know you're nervous about the test, but you studied hard. I believe you’ll ace it! 💯 ❤️”
- “It’s natural to doubt yourself. But trust me, you’re an amazing public speaker! 🎤 🤩”
Check if he might need some personal space.
Sometimes, the best way to support him is by giving him room to breathe. In order to work through his emotions, he may need to spend some time reflecting on his own. Alternatively, he might need to dive into hobbies, activities, or socializing to shift his mood.
- “Hey, would you like some space? I totally understand if you do.”
- “Do you need a bit of alone time? Maybe play that new game 🎮?”
- “Would it help if you hung out with your friends? Isn’t it fantasy football season? 🏈”
Send him an uplifting voice message.
Hearing your voice will make him feel like you’re right there beside him. When he listens to your message, it will brighten his day and make him feel less alone. He can even replay it whenever he’s feeling down.
- “Hey, just wanted to remind you how much I adore you! Mwah!”
- “Hope your day is as amazing as you are, sweetheart!”
- “Babe, my life changed the moment I met you. I’m so grateful.”
Tell him you're preparing his favorite comfort food.
This will help shift his focus from stress to dishes that bring back fond memories. Tease his appetite by describing a meal he's mentioned loving or one that reminds him of his childhood. Send a photo to add an extra touch—it’ll lift his spirits and leave him craving more!
- “I’ve got all the ingredients for a three-layer lasagna! Here’s a picture so you know what’s coming tonight. 😉 🖼️”
- “Here’s a video of me making baked mac and cheese! See how it’s bubbling? It’s going to be amazing! 🧀 🎥”
- “I baked a bunch of oatmeal muffins! 🧁🧁 I didn’t even know they existed until you mentioned them!”
Spoil him with affection.
When you send affectionate texts, he’ll feel truly loved. Remind him of the sweet connection you share and use words that emphasize closeness. He’ll picture you holding him and feeling cherished. Adjust your tone to what he likes—whether it’s playful, tender, or romantic!
- “Hey, cutie. Here’s a kiss just to remind you I care. 😘”
- “Quick snuggle coming your way! 🚗 😻 Couldn’t resist!”
- “You’re my everything! 🌹❤️ I wish I could hold you right now!”
Shower him with heartfelt compliments.
Complimenting him can remind him of his amazing qualities. Let him know how much he impresses you. Highlight how others benefit from his presence too. When you steer the conversation towards appreciation, you’ll trigger the release of “oxytocin,” also known as the “love hormone.” This will bring you both closer, even when you’re apart. Give his confidence a lift with something like:
- “You’re such a great listener. 👂🏾 I love how you make everyone feel valued.”
- “You’re brilliant! 🤯 I feel like I grow every time you speak.”
- “You blow me away every day. Your creativity is incredible. 🎨”
- Reader Poll: We surveyed 486 Mytour readers, and 65% said that the gesture they think would make their long-distance boyfriend feel the most special is sending him sweet messages. [Take Poll]
Flirt with him.
Playfully tease him to let him have fun and join the game. Add a bit of spice and flair to your conversations. Your playful efforts will likely make him smile, and he may even get swept up in the fun. Say something charming and passionate like:
- “I can’t stop thinking about you. 💭 🤤”
- “I’m absolutely smitten with you. 🥵”
- “I’m so lucky to call you mine. So lucky. 😈”
Send a cute selfie.
He’ll be excited to see a photo of his favorite person—YOU! Send him a selfie with your happy, flirty, or silly expressions and poses. Entertain him with a snapshot of yourself and send along something like:
- Give him a big smile and text, “Me when you call me! 💖”
- Make a funny face and ask, “Do you still love me when I do this? 😜”
- Show off a new outfit and say, “Got this just for you! 😏”
- Research shows that when he sees your face, he’ll experience the same emotions you’re showing—for example, if you smile, he’s more likely to smile and feel happier too.
Try a video call.
Nothing beats seeing each other's face! If you can’t meet in person, video calls are the next best thing. Make sure you schedule some uninterrupted time, find a cozy spot, and set the right vibe. Here are some ideas:
- In the morning, enjoy a cup of coffee or tea while discussing how you’ll both make your days amazing.
- After work or school, catch up while cooking dinner together and share details about your day.
- Before bed, light candles, slip into comfy pajamas, and have a laid-back, sweet chat to end the day with a warm “goodnight.”
Ask him if you can help with anything.
Helping out with errands can ease his stress. If he’s overwhelmed, offering to take care of a small task can make a big difference. See what he’s been meaning to get done and offer your assistance. You can also help with things he’s been postponing.
- “Why don’t I stop by? I’ve got a perfect plan to organize your closet! 👔 👞”
- “I’ll take your car to the shop for an oil change. 🛢️ You deserve a break!”
- “Let me handle that customer service call and sort out your return. 📱😝 It’s no problem!”
Send a picture of a gift you bought for him.
Showing him that he's your one and only will make him feel truly appreciated. Whether it's something over the top or simple and sweet—it all depends on what you know he loves! Just trust your instincts and be spontaneous. If you spot something that could brighten his day, go for it.
- "I got you some cozy fleece joggers! 👖 I know you’ve been wanting a new pair!”
- “Picked out this awesome waterproof watch for you! 🌊 🚫"
- “Went thrifting and found a whole collection of vinyls for you! 🎶 💋”
Set up some fun activities together.
Give him something exciting to look forward to. Think about what will entertain him and ease his stress. Share all your fun ideas with enthusiasm, whether it’s through texts or calls. You can suggest something he enjoys, try something new, or find a bonding activity. For example, you might say:
- "How about some tennis tomorrow? 🎾 I’ve got the perfect outfit for it! 😏”
- “I read about bioluminescent kayaking! Let’s try it out! ✨ 🚣🏾♂️"
- “Want to do a sci-fi marathon and cuddle tonight? 🤖 🫂”
- “Let’s mix it up! How about indoor skydiving together? 🤸♂️🤸♀️”
Keep things light with some jokes.
Laughter is a great way to reduce his anxiety. Send him a funny meme or a silly gif out of nowhere. You can also share a joke you find or make up one yourself—whether you're a comedy expert or just naturally funny, he’ll appreciate all your effort! For instance:
- Send him links to your favorite funny videos from a show or influencer.
- Watch a stand-up comedy special together.
- Text a funny pick-up line like, “Do you know CPR? Because you take my breath away. 😳”
Discuss your shared goals together.
Talking about your bright future together will keep him hopeful. If he’s had a tough day, encourage him to look toward what’s ahead and focus on his dreams. Talk about what he wants to achieve in the next month or even 5-10 years. Visualize the milestones you hope to reach as a couple.
- “You’ll wrap up your marathon training next week! 👟 You’re going to ace the race!”
- “Have you thought about where you’ll be in 5 years? 🤔 I can already picture you being incredibly successful!”
- “No matter what comes our way, we’ll build a beautiful life together. I promise. ❤️❤️”
